"Somebody somewhere is working harder than you."
Every morning I wake up and see that paper on the ceiling and every day I attempt to prove it wrong.
225lbs and steadily dropping 1-2lbs/week as planned. I came out of hibernation and caught the rays for 20 mins or so and I forgot how much I can look like Count Drogo when I have the tan going on.
Body building has been a roller-coaster so far. I've developed these ugly traits that are extremely uncharacteristic of me. Insecurity, self-consciousness, envy... and it's what the sport demands! I had to sacrifice my own self comfort just to participate. Shit, one of the reasons why my last relationship ended was because of the dirty-bulk. Think about that for a second. I had to become so unattractively large in preparation for this show, that my long-distance girlfriend used it against me during the ruination of our relationship.
The worst part is, whatever change comes is so subtle from one day to the next that I cannot notice it. Like a growing puppy that still thinks he can fit in your hand yet you can barely pick him up. I am suffering from some mean body dysmorphia. So forget the food prep, the diet maintenance, the calorie counting, or even the countless hours/week we spend in the gym; the psychological aspect of this sport is the most taxing by far.
But the truth is, I would have never been able to empathize with a client if I had never tried it. Oh, and I'm going to be in the best shape of my life if I'm not so already.
"The day you started lifting is the day you became forever small. Because you will never be as big as you want to be." -Dom