In the Dark - Part Three
Title:In The Dark
Author(s): escapes
Artist: x_serenade
Rating: R
Disclaimer:Don't own them, making no money. I only own the order I put the words in.
Characters/Pairings: Luke / Noah
Word Count: 13,766 words
Warnings: Boys kissing, touching, making out.
Spoilers:None.
Summary: On Valentine's Day Luke and Noah spend the day together doing a marathon of the Lord of the Rings movies and Casey is a hobbit. This is the movie night that is alluded to in Divergence, but it's not necessary to have read that story to read this.
Author’s Notes: Thank you to noelleleithe for the beta. She whipped me my commas and grammar into shape. Thank you!
Link to Art Master Post: http://x-serenade.livejournal.com/47599.html
Link to Story Master Post:
PART ONE PART TWO
Luke chuckles and tilts his head to the same angle for a second as he leans in to give his boyfriend a peck. "Well damn," he drawls, "I was looking forward to sucking my initials into the side of your neck."
Noah stifles the groan that wanted to come out at that thought. "Go ahead," he says, biting his lip to keep from chuckling at the surprise on Luke's face. "As long as I can do the same to you, keeping in mind we both are expected for dinner at the farm tomorrow night."
Luke narrows his eyes at Noah, looking like he's weighting the pros and cons of matching hickey initials, but grins when Noah's face starts to look vaguely horrified that Luke might actually do it. "You are so easy to freak sometimes, Mayer," he says.
Noah lifts his head upright again, raising his eyebrow at Luke. "Just for that," he says, taking his hands and wrapping them around the sides of his own neck, "no neck for you."
Luke's mouth drops open and he grabs Noah's wrists, trying to pry Noah's hands away from where his lips and tongue wanted to be. "Hey! No fair!" he whines. "Like you wouldn't have done the same thing!"
Noah has to concede that he probably would have, but that's beside the point. He knows that Luke isn't as upset as he is letting on, and a frustrated Luke is a creative Luke. Keeping his neck covered, Noah shakes his head. "Not the point. No neck for you," he sing songs the last part, just to irritate his boyfriend.
Luke curls his lip as he mockingly sing songs 'no neck for you' back at Noah. Then he starts to plot, narrowing his eyes as they dart from sensitive spot to sensitive spot.
Noah thinks he may have underestimated Luke when he sees the spots that Luke's gaze is moving to and from. Noah sees Luke's eyes zero in on his side for a tickle attack, feels Luke sit back a little until he's sitting lightly on the spot on the top of his kneecap that literally caused a knee jerk reaction out of him, then Luke's gaze drops between them and Noah feels his own body reacting to the weight of that stare, reminding him of the tightness in his pajama pants that has not gone away.
When Luke slides back even more, until he's sitting on his haunches, his knees beside Noah's hips, Noah feel a ball of anticipation start to tingle in his gut. Noah knows his boyfriend is definitely plotting something. The question is, what?
"Luke, what are you doing?" Noah asks, half afraid, half holding his breath in anticipation.
His question is answered a second later when Luke springs into movement, surging forward to straddle Noah's lap again, but using the momentum of that forward move to overbalance them and push them over.
Noah felt himself falling backwards and flails his arms out to break the fall, a startled "FWAAAAH!" coming out of his mouth.
The second that Noah's arms hit the blankets, Luke has their palms pressing together and their fingers intertwined as he lightly holds Noah's arms down. Smiling smugly, Luke leans down and licks a stripe up the forbidden side of Noah's neck, adding a bite to his boyfriend’s earlobe for good measure. "Bet'cha didn't see that coming," he says, and even though Noah can't see Luke's face, he knows that Luke is still smirking.
His top teeth biting into his bottom lip, Noah squeezes Luke's fingers where they're woven with his own. "Having you rush at me like some quarterback on a mission? No, I can't say I saw you pulling that one," he says.
Chuckling lowly, Luke raises himself off of Noah enough to look down at him. "It was more of a modified offensive move from my basketball days, but close enough," he says, then wiggles his eyebrows at Noah suggestively. "Well, now that I have you right where I want you, what am I going to do with you?" The tone he uses says he knows exactly what he's going to do.
Noah looks up at Luke.
Luke looks down at Noah.
When Luke does nothing but keep staring down at him, Noah tries to move his hands from under Luke's. "Luke! Do something!" he says, growling in frustration when Luke won't let go of his grip on Noah's hands.
Noah huffs out an exasperated breath and then is struck by a way to get Luke to move things forward. "Luuuke," he growls, his voice dipping into its lower, raspier registers, giving Luke one last chance.
Luke swallows deeply at the timbre of Noah's voice. Lying chest to chest like they are, the rumble of it vibrates along his skin and he has to tamp down on the need to shiver in response.
When Luke doesn't make any sort of move, Noah relaxes back into the mattress below him for a second, feeling Luke's body relax in response. It's the cue that Noah is waiting for and he bucks his body upwards, rolling them both over again and making Luke let out a startled cry of his own.
Noah looks down at him. "Enough of the teasing," he growls and kisses Luke before the other man can even try to respond.
Luke's smile is swallowed inside of the kiss. Luke has learned that when dealing with Noah and anything that moves them forward on the path to actually, maybe, someday having sex, Luke can't push Noah along at the pace he himself wants to go. Luke figures it's a holdover from Noah having no choice and no options in the days of living with the Colonel, where it was his way or isolation from everyone and everything. Whatever the cause of it, Luke has learned that he needs to wait until Noah makes the move that nudges them forward.
Even though Luke knows that Noah would never think that Luke forced him into something he didn't want, Luke also knows how persuasive and insidious that voice in the back of your head can be.
As soon as that thought goes through Luke's head, it's wiped right out by Noah's hips moving forward and rubbing their cocks together, making any thoughts other than more, harder and nownownow judged as taking up way too much room and thrown out of Luke's head on the heels of Noah's next thrust against him.
Noah keeps his hips in motion, knowing better than to give Luke any leeway to take control again. The sensations are throbbing through him like fire through his veins and as good as it feels, it's not long until Noah wants more. Needs more.
Noah raises his hand and uses it to cup Luke's jaw as he pulls out of their kiss. Tilting Luke's head back, Noah kisses a path from the strong line of Luke's jaw to the dip in Luke's sternum at the base of his throat. Noah flicking his tongue in that dip makes Luke's hands fist in the blanket below them as his mouth drops open and the loudest sound in the room becomes Luke's thundering breathing, the last part of each exhale ending on a moan.
Noah lets go of Luke's jaw and slides his hand down Luke's side, fingertips riding over the ticklish skin that covers his ribs. Instead of squirming away from the feeling, Luke gasps as it expands the sensation going through him at a lightning pace, leaving Luke feeling like every hair on his arms and the back of his neck is standing straight up.
Luke has to concentrate to let go of the blankets, and when he does, he moves one arm to Noah's shoulder, his fingers tangling in Noah's hair. The other works its way downwards, first his fingertips, then his whole hand sliding under the waistband of Noah's sleep pants and splaying around the curve of Noah's ass as it flexes with every movement forward against Luke's hips.
Feeling his eyes wanting to roll back into his head from the friction building between the two of them, Luke tightens his hold around Noah's shoulder and buries his head in the crook of Noah's neck as his legs tighten on Noah's sides. "Oh god, Noah," he breathes. "It feels so good. So...oh my god...."
The heat of Luke's breath across his collarbone is nearly Noah's undoing. His sleep pants are so tight that they're bordering on painful, but instead of it being a bad thing, it's just adding to fire in his bloodstream.
Noah's shoulders are burning from holding him halfway up, his hips and the small of his back aching from the tension of overuse and what feels like every nerve ending in his body being wired there.
When the burn shifts into a throb that thrums along with his heartbeat, Noah knows that he's not going to last much longer. "Luke...so close...oh god...love...ohohoh...," he grunts out between shuddering breaths.
And just like that, Noah goes from knowing he's heading for the edge to actually being there in what seems like the space between heartbeats. He opens his mouth to warn Luke.
Luke groans. His entire body feeling like it's burning up from the inside out, the feeling like every drop of blood in his body has filled his groin to the point of painful fullness. His fingertips dig into the flesh of Noah's ass as his other hand tightens in Noah's hair hard enough to draw a gasp of pain from his boyfriend. Luke knows he can't hold on any longer. If he does, he's afraid the knot inside of him will tighten even more and kill him. He opens his mouth to warn Noah.
Before either of them can utter a sound, they tumble over the tipping point, and they can only cling to each other as their bodies burn up, empty out and shake apart. Even their voices are beyond their control, the sounds of relief and pleasure too new and sharp to be stifled and controlled.
When the rush wanes and Luke and Noah's sated and exhausted bodies relinquish control back to them, they're lying side by side, staring at each other, dazed.
Luke licks his lips, taking a few breaths before he's sure he's found his vocal chords again. "Noah?" he softly says. Luke wants to say more, to say how he's feeling and how his mind is completely blown at this moment, but as completely wrecked as he is, Luke knows that this was a huge step for Noah. He just doesn't know if it was a step Noah was comfortable with taking.
Noah hears the question in Luke's voice and knows that Luke is feeling him out to see if he's freaking out about what they've done. Licking his own lips, he takes a deep breath and does an inventory of what's going through what's left of his mind.
For the first time that he can remember, Noah can't hear that voice in the back of his head. All he can hear and feel is the hum of satisfaction that's running through every part of him. He reaches out a shaking hand and cups the side of Luke's face, smiling. "Luke," he says, letting the contentment he's feeling right now add a warm tone to his shredded voice that he knows that Luke will hear.
Luke smiles back, his relief showing on his face, and to Noah it spreads warmth over him like summer sunshine. He wants to tell Luke that he has nothing to worry about, that this had felt way more right than the desperate sex he'd had with Maddie in Branson and anything they'd done after that. If this is how it feels half clothed, Noah thinks, and it blows anything that he and Maddie did out of the water, he can't wait until they're both ready to go further.
Not that he's ready for that. Yet.
Seeing Noah's unfocused eyes, Luke reaches out and taps his fingertip on Noah's forehead. "Stop thinking so much," he says.
Noah blinks as he comes out of his thoughts and gives Luke an embarrassed smile when he realizes he's been busted. "I'm trying to find the pieces of my blown mind," he teases.
Following Noah's lead, Luke takes up Noah's teasing mood. Stretching his arm upwards and lengthening his body in a stretch, Luke grins. "It was pretty awesome, wasn't it?" he boasts.
Noah laughs softly, then a little louder when Luke's stretch presses his groin into the wet front of his sleep pants and Luke lets out a disgusted noise. Noah isn't enjoying the rapidly cooling, clammy feeling in his pants either.
Luke flops onto his back and takes a deep breath. "I think I have a pair of sleep pants that will be long enough for you," he says, staring upwards in the direction of his room.
Noah lies on his back as well and nods. "Anything is going to feel better than the mess we both have going on," he says.
Both of them keep lying on their backs, their hands lightly touching in the space between them, until Luke grunts and sits up. "Okay, moving now. Be back in a minute."
Noah watches Luke pull the front of his pants outward in a vain attempt to keep the wet material from making him walk funny. It doesn't work and Noah chuckles at the duck walk Luke is doing as he goes through the door that leads to the kitchen and to the back stairs.
Raising his head off of the mattress, Noah looks around at the snack carnage around them and gets to his feet. Trying to move as little as possible, he piles all their mess into the popcorn bowl and looks down at the blanket, making sure none of their mess had gotten on it.
Luke comes back into the room, a new pair of sleep pants on and a pair in his hands for Noah, along with a clean pair of boxer briefs.
Noah takes the clothes from him and reaches out to curl his fingers around the back of Luke's neck, using the grip to pull his boyfriend closer and kiss him. "Thanks," he says.
Luke shrugs. "They're just sleep pants," he says.
Noah ducks his head to look directly into Luke's eyes. "Not for that," he says, then amending it when Luke's eyebrow raises. "Okay, not just for that. For being patient, for knowing just how far I can go and waiting for me to get there." He shakes his head when he feels like he's not being clear enough. "Do you understand what I mean?" he asks, frustrated with his ongoing problem with finding the words he needs when he needs them.
Luke presses two fingertips to Noah's lips, quieting him. "I understand. And you don't have to thank me. I'm just feeling things out the same way you are." He blushes when Noah's eyes sparkle with humor at Luke's phrasing. "Shut up. I totally didn't mean that as dirty as it sounded."
They both laugh, the moment giving them the levity they desperately wanted. Luke nods at the clothes in Noah's arms. "Go get changed before that mess dries and you're cemented in those pajamas and we have to chisel you out."
Noah makes a face at that mental image and nods. "I'm going, I'm going," he says. "We can throw on the special features disc when I get back."
Luke nods, knowing that it'll probably not even be half done before they're both asleep. The sluggish feeling that always descends after he's had an orgasm is bearing down on him harder than he's ever felt, but he's not surprised at that, considering he’s never had any experience other than his own hand. He smiles as he brings their mess into the kitchen and starts sorting it into the garbage and dishwasher.
Looking out the window over the sink, at the edge of the darkness, he can see his Grandma Emma's porch light shining, and now that he and Noah have taken this step forward in their relationship, the distance between his room and Noah's seems to have tripled. They have to start finding more time alone.
Luke lets his mind wander further. Maybe it’s time for him to think about moving into the dorms, or they could find an off-campus apartment to rent, together. Luke's heart speeds up at the thought of having a place all their own. Maybe he can talk to his Grandmother about moving into her cottage. That way he'd still be close to family to appease his parents, but he knows Lucinda would let him and Noah do their own thing.
Hearing the sounds of Noah making his way down the hallway, Luke turns away from the window and pulls himself back from his thoughts. Too much, too soon. He has faith that Noah will start thinking about the same things eventually and maybe then he'll lay out the plans he has for his grandmother's cottage.
Luke follows Noah back to the sofa bed, and they snuggle together under the blanket after Noah loads the special features DVD and sets it to play.
Luke burrows closer to Noah's side as he feels his eyes getting heavier.
Noah intertwines his fingers with Luke's across his stomach and sighs softly, wanting this moment to last for as long as it can. He finally is starting to feel comfortable in his own skin, not like everyone's eyes are on him just waiting for him to screw up, so they can take everything away from him.
Pulling Luke's sleeping body closer into his side, Noah leans his head down to kiss Luke's forehead before falling asleep himself.
Epilogue:
Luke stands at the sink of the farm, the quiet of the house settling around him as swishes the water in his mouth, hoping that it will wash the taste of wedding cake, vomit, and bitterness out of it.
He sees the porch light from his parents’ house shining out in the darkness, and Luke remembers the night of the movie marathon. It seems like it was years ago, instead of just over a week.
They'd been so happy and closer than they'd ever been, but that was before a letter from Statesville, a strange woman in a head scarf and Noah's need to make up for the sins of his father kicked in. Now Luke feels like he's lost Noah for at least the next however many years this farce drags on, maybe forever.
He presses his hands flat against his stomach as it rolls again, and he hopes that the puddle of sick he'd left on the ground behind the barn wasn't going to be joined by another one.
Spitting out the mouthful of water into the sink, he takes a long, slow drink, hoping that it will calm his stomach down.
Putting down the glass, Luke braces himself over the sink with his hands, taking a few deep breaths until the nausea passes.
When it does, he straightens up and makes his way to the door to the stairwell, brushing his fingers down the light switch to leave only the one light his grandmother kept burning through the night on.
Making his way up to the room that has always been his at the farmhouse, Luke walks quickly down the hall, never lifting his eyes off the well-worn wood floor under his feet and refusing to let his feet pause outside of the room that used to be Noah's and now housed his wife.
When he makes it to his own room, he closes the door behind him and leans against it, closing his eyes. He doesn't think he can do this. Maybe it would be better to just cut his losses and move back to his room at his parents’ house in the morning, instead of staying here and watching Noah bury himself further and further inside of the lies they’re telling.
When he thinks about how happy his family had been to celebrate this wedding, even if it was a lie from beginning to end, he's not even sure his parents’ place is where he wants to go.
Emma's fussing and his family’s happiness at the ceremony feel like the worst kind of betrayal to Luke. Like they were rubbing in the fact that he is never going to have this. That even this sham of a marriage is more accepted than Luke's marriage to another man someday will ever be.
Luke's eyes snap open when he realizes that, for the first time, when he thinks of his future and standing in front of friends and family saying vows… Noah's face isn't the one that's sharply in focus across from him.
Not wanting to look too closely at that, he pushes himself off of the door and forces himself to brush his teeth and get changed for bed, hoping like hell that he won't run into her on his way to or from the bathroom this part of the house shares.
He doesn't, and makes it back to his room undisturbed. Sliding in under the cool sheets of his bed, Luke snaps the bedside light off and turns on his side, sliding his hand under his pillow and frowning when his fingertips brush into something that crinkles.
Sitting up, Luke snaps the light back on and vows to wake up the whole house if some asshole thought it would be amusing to put a piece of wedding cake under his pillow like the stupid myth about dreaming of the person you will marry tells you to.
Lifting the pillow, Luke sees a folded piece of paper lying there. Lifting it up, he opens it and sees his name in Noah's handwriting.
Luke,
Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen.
Noah
Luke reads the words, mouthing them silently, recognizing them from the scene where Aragorn is leaving with the fellowship and he is trying to persuade Arwen to go to the undying lands with her people.
He mouths the words again, the translation floating to the front of his memory and burning itself there. 'If you trust nothing else... trust this. Trust us.' He's surprised that Noah has gone to the trouble of looking up this translation from the movie, but strangely touched that he'd done it.
Luke folds the paper closed again and presses it between his palms for a moment, letting the words somehow try to work their way through to the part of him that is raw and hurting.
During the marathon, when they'd been assigning characters to the people in their lives, Luke had made a case that Noah was Aragorn, but with everything that's happened, he knows now that he was wrong. So was Noah.
Noah had called himself Samwise Gamgee to Luke's Frodo, but as he sits here in his bed, Luke realizes that they'd gotten it backwards.
Noah is the one that has taken them on this mission, not knowing where it's going to lead and what's going to block their path, only knowing he needs to right a wrong.
It's Noah that is the ring bearer, not him. It's Luke that is Samwise, taking care of Noah, his Frodo, on this twisted journey they've started themselves on. Knowing that the power of the ring is going to come between them, but powerless to stop it from happening. It had already started.
Luke's eyes stray to his bookshelf. Just like in the books, his, Noah's and Ameera's fates are all bound by the plain gold ring circling Noah's finger, along with everyone that knew the secret behind the this marriage.
Holding Noah's ring before the ceremony, he'd felt the weight of it and all it stands for. Even now, he can feel the ghost of it there, branding him.
Placing the paper back under his pillow, Luke closes his eyes, traces a fingertip over the folded edge of it and tries to let himself trust.
He starts to mouth the words on Noah's note again, but instead different words come off his lips, unbidden, the sound of them breaking the quietness of the sleeping farmhouse.
"Ash nazg durbatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul."
One ring to rule them all and in the darkness bind them.
Author(s): escapes
Artist: x_serenade
Rating: R
Disclaimer:Don't own them, making no money. I only own the order I put the words in.
Characters/Pairings: Luke / Noah
Word Count: 13,766 words
Warnings: Boys kissing, touching, making out.
Spoilers:None.
Summary: On Valentine's Day Luke and Noah spend the day together doing a marathon of the Lord of the Rings movies and Casey is a hobbit. This is the movie night that is alluded to in Divergence, but it's not necessary to have read that story to read this.
Author’s Notes: Thank you to noelleleithe for the beta. She whipped me my commas and grammar into shape. Thank you!
Link to Art Master Post: http://x-serenade.livejournal.com/47599.html
Link to Story Master Post:
PART ONE PART TWO
Luke chuckles and tilts his head to the same angle for a second as he leans in to give his boyfriend a peck. "Well damn," he drawls, "I was looking forward to sucking my initials into the side of your neck."
Noah stifles the groan that wanted to come out at that thought. "Go ahead," he says, biting his lip to keep from chuckling at the surprise on Luke's face. "As long as I can do the same to you, keeping in mind we both are expected for dinner at the farm tomorrow night."
Luke narrows his eyes at Noah, looking like he's weighting the pros and cons of matching hickey initials, but grins when Noah's face starts to look vaguely horrified that Luke might actually do it. "You are so easy to freak sometimes, Mayer," he says.
Noah lifts his head upright again, raising his eyebrow at Luke. "Just for that," he says, taking his hands and wrapping them around the sides of his own neck, "no neck for you."
Luke's mouth drops open and he grabs Noah's wrists, trying to pry Noah's hands away from where his lips and tongue wanted to be. "Hey! No fair!" he whines. "Like you wouldn't have done the same thing!"
Noah has to concede that he probably would have, but that's beside the point. He knows that Luke isn't as upset as he is letting on, and a frustrated Luke is a creative Luke. Keeping his neck covered, Noah shakes his head. "Not the point. No neck for you," he sing songs the last part, just to irritate his boyfriend.
Luke curls his lip as he mockingly sing songs 'no neck for you' back at Noah. Then he starts to plot, narrowing his eyes as they dart from sensitive spot to sensitive spot.
Noah thinks he may have underestimated Luke when he sees the spots that Luke's gaze is moving to and from. Noah sees Luke's eyes zero in on his side for a tickle attack, feels Luke sit back a little until he's sitting lightly on the spot on the top of his kneecap that literally caused a knee jerk reaction out of him, then Luke's gaze drops between them and Noah feels his own body reacting to the weight of that stare, reminding him of the tightness in his pajama pants that has not gone away.
When Luke slides back even more, until he's sitting on his haunches, his knees beside Noah's hips, Noah feel a ball of anticipation start to tingle in his gut. Noah knows his boyfriend is definitely plotting something. The question is, what?
"Luke, what are you doing?" Noah asks, half afraid, half holding his breath in anticipation.
His question is answered a second later when Luke springs into movement, surging forward to straddle Noah's lap again, but using the momentum of that forward move to overbalance them and push them over.
Noah felt himself falling backwards and flails his arms out to break the fall, a startled "FWAAAAH!" coming out of his mouth.
The second that Noah's arms hit the blankets, Luke has their palms pressing together and their fingers intertwined as he lightly holds Noah's arms down. Smiling smugly, Luke leans down and licks a stripe up the forbidden side of Noah's neck, adding a bite to his boyfriend’s earlobe for good measure. "Bet'cha didn't see that coming," he says, and even though Noah can't see Luke's face, he knows that Luke is still smirking.
His top teeth biting into his bottom lip, Noah squeezes Luke's fingers where they're woven with his own. "Having you rush at me like some quarterback on a mission? No, I can't say I saw you pulling that one," he says.
Chuckling lowly, Luke raises himself off of Noah enough to look down at him. "It was more of a modified offensive move from my basketball days, but close enough," he says, then wiggles his eyebrows at Noah suggestively. "Well, now that I have you right where I want you, what am I going to do with you?" The tone he uses says he knows exactly what he's going to do.
Noah looks up at Luke.
Luke looks down at Noah.
When Luke does nothing but keep staring down at him, Noah tries to move his hands from under Luke's. "Luke! Do something!" he says, growling in frustration when Luke won't let go of his grip on Noah's hands.
Noah huffs out an exasperated breath and then is struck by a way to get Luke to move things forward. "Luuuke," he growls, his voice dipping into its lower, raspier registers, giving Luke one last chance.
Luke swallows deeply at the timbre of Noah's voice. Lying chest to chest like they are, the rumble of it vibrates along his skin and he has to tamp down on the need to shiver in response.
When Luke doesn't make any sort of move, Noah relaxes back into the mattress below him for a second, feeling Luke's body relax in response. It's the cue that Noah is waiting for and he bucks his body upwards, rolling them both over again and making Luke let out a startled cry of his own.
Noah looks down at him. "Enough of the teasing," he growls and kisses Luke before the other man can even try to respond.
Luke's smile is swallowed inside of the kiss. Luke has learned that when dealing with Noah and anything that moves them forward on the path to actually, maybe, someday having sex, Luke can't push Noah along at the pace he himself wants to go. Luke figures it's a holdover from Noah having no choice and no options in the days of living with the Colonel, where it was his way or isolation from everyone and everything. Whatever the cause of it, Luke has learned that he needs to wait until Noah makes the move that nudges them forward.
Even though Luke knows that Noah would never think that Luke forced him into something he didn't want, Luke also knows how persuasive and insidious that voice in the back of your head can be.
As soon as that thought goes through Luke's head, it's wiped right out by Noah's hips moving forward and rubbing their cocks together, making any thoughts other than more, harder and nownownow judged as taking up way too much room and thrown out of Luke's head on the heels of Noah's next thrust against him.
Noah keeps his hips in motion, knowing better than to give Luke any leeway to take control again. The sensations are throbbing through him like fire through his veins and as good as it feels, it's not long until Noah wants more. Needs more.
Noah raises his hand and uses it to cup Luke's jaw as he pulls out of their kiss. Tilting Luke's head back, Noah kisses a path from the strong line of Luke's jaw to the dip in Luke's sternum at the base of his throat. Noah flicking his tongue in that dip makes Luke's hands fist in the blanket below them as his mouth drops open and the loudest sound in the room becomes Luke's thundering breathing, the last part of each exhale ending on a moan.
Noah lets go of Luke's jaw and slides his hand down Luke's side, fingertips riding over the ticklish skin that covers his ribs. Instead of squirming away from the feeling, Luke gasps as it expands the sensation going through him at a lightning pace, leaving Luke feeling like every hair on his arms and the back of his neck is standing straight up.
Luke has to concentrate to let go of the blankets, and when he does, he moves one arm to Noah's shoulder, his fingers tangling in Noah's hair. The other works its way downwards, first his fingertips, then his whole hand sliding under the waistband of Noah's sleep pants and splaying around the curve of Noah's ass as it flexes with every movement forward against Luke's hips.
Feeling his eyes wanting to roll back into his head from the friction building between the two of them, Luke tightens his hold around Noah's shoulder and buries his head in the crook of Noah's neck as his legs tighten on Noah's sides. "Oh god, Noah," he breathes. "It feels so good. So...oh my god...."
The heat of Luke's breath across his collarbone is nearly Noah's undoing. His sleep pants are so tight that they're bordering on painful, but instead of it being a bad thing, it's just adding to fire in his bloodstream.
Noah's shoulders are burning from holding him halfway up, his hips and the small of his back aching from the tension of overuse and what feels like every nerve ending in his body being wired there.
When the burn shifts into a throb that thrums along with his heartbeat, Noah knows that he's not going to last much longer. "Luke...so close...oh god...love...ohohoh...," he grunts out between shuddering breaths.
And just like that, Noah goes from knowing he's heading for the edge to actually being there in what seems like the space between heartbeats. He opens his mouth to warn Luke.
Luke groans. His entire body feeling like it's burning up from the inside out, the feeling like every drop of blood in his body has filled his groin to the point of painful fullness. His fingertips dig into the flesh of Noah's ass as his other hand tightens in Noah's hair hard enough to draw a gasp of pain from his boyfriend. Luke knows he can't hold on any longer. If he does, he's afraid the knot inside of him will tighten even more and kill him. He opens his mouth to warn Noah.
Before either of them can utter a sound, they tumble over the tipping point, and they can only cling to each other as their bodies burn up, empty out and shake apart. Even their voices are beyond their control, the sounds of relief and pleasure too new and sharp to be stifled and controlled.
When the rush wanes and Luke and Noah's sated and exhausted bodies relinquish control back to them, they're lying side by side, staring at each other, dazed.
Luke licks his lips, taking a few breaths before he's sure he's found his vocal chords again. "Noah?" he softly says. Luke wants to say more, to say how he's feeling and how his mind is completely blown at this moment, but as completely wrecked as he is, Luke knows that this was a huge step for Noah. He just doesn't know if it was a step Noah was comfortable with taking.
Noah hears the question in Luke's voice and knows that Luke is feeling him out to see if he's freaking out about what they've done. Licking his own lips, he takes a deep breath and does an inventory of what's going through what's left of his mind.
For the first time that he can remember, Noah can't hear that voice in the back of his head. All he can hear and feel is the hum of satisfaction that's running through every part of him. He reaches out a shaking hand and cups the side of Luke's face, smiling. "Luke," he says, letting the contentment he's feeling right now add a warm tone to his shredded voice that he knows that Luke will hear.
Luke smiles back, his relief showing on his face, and to Noah it spreads warmth over him like summer sunshine. He wants to tell Luke that he has nothing to worry about, that this had felt way more right than the desperate sex he'd had with Maddie in Branson and anything they'd done after that. If this is how it feels half clothed, Noah thinks, and it blows anything that he and Maddie did out of the water, he can't wait until they're both ready to go further.
Not that he's ready for that. Yet.
Seeing Noah's unfocused eyes, Luke reaches out and taps his fingertip on Noah's forehead. "Stop thinking so much," he says.
Noah blinks as he comes out of his thoughts and gives Luke an embarrassed smile when he realizes he's been busted. "I'm trying to find the pieces of my blown mind," he teases.
Following Noah's lead, Luke takes up Noah's teasing mood. Stretching his arm upwards and lengthening his body in a stretch, Luke grins. "It was pretty awesome, wasn't it?" he boasts.
Noah laughs softly, then a little louder when Luke's stretch presses his groin into the wet front of his sleep pants and Luke lets out a disgusted noise. Noah isn't enjoying the rapidly cooling, clammy feeling in his pants either.
Luke flops onto his back and takes a deep breath. "I think I have a pair of sleep pants that will be long enough for you," he says, staring upwards in the direction of his room.
Noah lies on his back as well and nods. "Anything is going to feel better than the mess we both have going on," he says.
Both of them keep lying on their backs, their hands lightly touching in the space between them, until Luke grunts and sits up. "Okay, moving now. Be back in a minute."
Noah watches Luke pull the front of his pants outward in a vain attempt to keep the wet material from making him walk funny. It doesn't work and Noah chuckles at the duck walk Luke is doing as he goes through the door that leads to the kitchen and to the back stairs.
Raising his head off of the mattress, Noah looks around at the snack carnage around them and gets to his feet. Trying to move as little as possible, he piles all their mess into the popcorn bowl and looks down at the blanket, making sure none of their mess had gotten on it.
Luke comes back into the room, a new pair of sleep pants on and a pair in his hands for Noah, along with a clean pair of boxer briefs.
Noah takes the clothes from him and reaches out to curl his fingers around the back of Luke's neck, using the grip to pull his boyfriend closer and kiss him. "Thanks," he says.
Luke shrugs. "They're just sleep pants," he says.
Noah ducks his head to look directly into Luke's eyes. "Not for that," he says, then amending it when Luke's eyebrow raises. "Okay, not just for that. For being patient, for knowing just how far I can go and waiting for me to get there." He shakes his head when he feels like he's not being clear enough. "Do you understand what I mean?" he asks, frustrated with his ongoing problem with finding the words he needs when he needs them.
Luke presses two fingertips to Noah's lips, quieting him. "I understand. And you don't have to thank me. I'm just feeling things out the same way you are." He blushes when Noah's eyes sparkle with humor at Luke's phrasing. "Shut up. I totally didn't mean that as dirty as it sounded."
They both laugh, the moment giving them the levity they desperately wanted. Luke nods at the clothes in Noah's arms. "Go get changed before that mess dries and you're cemented in those pajamas and we have to chisel you out."
Noah makes a face at that mental image and nods. "I'm going, I'm going," he says. "We can throw on the special features disc when I get back."
Luke nods, knowing that it'll probably not even be half done before they're both asleep. The sluggish feeling that always descends after he's had an orgasm is bearing down on him harder than he's ever felt, but he's not surprised at that, considering he’s never had any experience other than his own hand. He smiles as he brings their mess into the kitchen and starts sorting it into the garbage and dishwasher.
Looking out the window over the sink, at the edge of the darkness, he can see his Grandma Emma's porch light shining, and now that he and Noah have taken this step forward in their relationship, the distance between his room and Noah's seems to have tripled. They have to start finding more time alone.
Luke lets his mind wander further. Maybe it’s time for him to think about moving into the dorms, or they could find an off-campus apartment to rent, together. Luke's heart speeds up at the thought of having a place all their own. Maybe he can talk to his Grandmother about moving into her cottage. That way he'd still be close to family to appease his parents, but he knows Lucinda would let him and Noah do their own thing.
Hearing the sounds of Noah making his way down the hallway, Luke turns away from the window and pulls himself back from his thoughts. Too much, too soon. He has faith that Noah will start thinking about the same things eventually and maybe then he'll lay out the plans he has for his grandmother's cottage.
Luke follows Noah back to the sofa bed, and they snuggle together under the blanket after Noah loads the special features DVD and sets it to play.
Luke burrows closer to Noah's side as he feels his eyes getting heavier.
Noah intertwines his fingers with Luke's across his stomach and sighs softly, wanting this moment to last for as long as it can. He finally is starting to feel comfortable in his own skin, not like everyone's eyes are on him just waiting for him to screw up, so they can take everything away from him.
Pulling Luke's sleeping body closer into his side, Noah leans his head down to kiss Luke's forehead before falling asleep himself.
Epilogue:
Luke stands at the sink of the farm, the quiet of the house settling around him as swishes the water in his mouth, hoping that it will wash the taste of wedding cake, vomit, and bitterness out of it.
He sees the porch light from his parents’ house shining out in the darkness, and Luke remembers the night of the movie marathon. It seems like it was years ago, instead of just over a week.
They'd been so happy and closer than they'd ever been, but that was before a letter from Statesville, a strange woman in a head scarf and Noah's need to make up for the sins of his father kicked in. Now Luke feels like he's lost Noah for at least the next however many years this farce drags on, maybe forever.
He presses his hands flat against his stomach as it rolls again, and he hopes that the puddle of sick he'd left on the ground behind the barn wasn't going to be joined by another one.
Spitting out the mouthful of water into the sink, he takes a long, slow drink, hoping that it will calm his stomach down.
Putting down the glass, Luke braces himself over the sink with his hands, taking a few deep breaths until the nausea passes.
When it does, he straightens up and makes his way to the door to the stairwell, brushing his fingers down the light switch to leave only the one light his grandmother kept burning through the night on.
Making his way up to the room that has always been his at the farmhouse, Luke walks quickly down the hall, never lifting his eyes off the well-worn wood floor under his feet and refusing to let his feet pause outside of the room that used to be Noah's and now housed his wife.
When he makes it to his own room, he closes the door behind him and leans against it, closing his eyes. He doesn't think he can do this. Maybe it would be better to just cut his losses and move back to his room at his parents’ house in the morning, instead of staying here and watching Noah bury himself further and further inside of the lies they’re telling.
When he thinks about how happy his family had been to celebrate this wedding, even if it was a lie from beginning to end, he's not even sure his parents’ place is where he wants to go.
Emma's fussing and his family’s happiness at the ceremony feel like the worst kind of betrayal to Luke. Like they were rubbing in the fact that he is never going to have this. That even this sham of a marriage is more accepted than Luke's marriage to another man someday will ever be.
Luke's eyes snap open when he realizes that, for the first time, when he thinks of his future and standing in front of friends and family saying vows… Noah's face isn't the one that's sharply in focus across from him.
Not wanting to look too closely at that, he pushes himself off of the door and forces himself to brush his teeth and get changed for bed, hoping like hell that he won't run into her on his way to or from the bathroom this part of the house shares.
He doesn't, and makes it back to his room undisturbed. Sliding in under the cool sheets of his bed, Luke snaps the bedside light off and turns on his side, sliding his hand under his pillow and frowning when his fingertips brush into something that crinkles.
Sitting up, Luke snaps the light back on and vows to wake up the whole house if some asshole thought it would be amusing to put a piece of wedding cake under his pillow like the stupid myth about dreaming of the person you will marry tells you to.
Lifting the pillow, Luke sees a folded piece of paper lying there. Lifting it up, he opens it and sees his name in Noah's handwriting.
Luke,
Ae ú-esteliach nad... estelio han. Estelio ammen.
Noah
Luke reads the words, mouthing them silently, recognizing them from the scene where Aragorn is leaving with the fellowship and he is trying to persuade Arwen to go to the undying lands with her people.
He mouths the words again, the translation floating to the front of his memory and burning itself there. 'If you trust nothing else... trust this. Trust us.' He's surprised that Noah has gone to the trouble of looking up this translation from the movie, but strangely touched that he'd done it.
Luke folds the paper closed again and presses it between his palms for a moment, letting the words somehow try to work their way through to the part of him that is raw and hurting.
During the marathon, when they'd been assigning characters to the people in their lives, Luke had made a case that Noah was Aragorn, but with everything that's happened, he knows now that he was wrong. So was Noah.
Noah had called himself Samwise Gamgee to Luke's Frodo, but as he sits here in his bed, Luke realizes that they'd gotten it backwards.
Noah is the one that has taken them on this mission, not knowing where it's going to lead and what's going to block their path, only knowing he needs to right a wrong.
It's Noah that is the ring bearer, not him. It's Luke that is Samwise, taking care of Noah, his Frodo, on this twisted journey they've started themselves on. Knowing that the power of the ring is going to come between them, but powerless to stop it from happening. It had already started.
Luke's eyes stray to his bookshelf. Just like in the books, his, Noah's and Ameera's fates are all bound by the plain gold ring circling Noah's finger, along with everyone that knew the secret behind the this marriage.
Holding Noah's ring before the ceremony, he'd felt the weight of it and all it stands for. Even now, he can feel the ghost of it there, branding him.
Placing the paper back under his pillow, Luke closes his eyes, traces a fingertip over the folded edge of it and tries to let himself trust.
He starts to mouth the words on Noah's note again, but instead different words come off his lips, unbidden, the sound of them breaking the quietness of the sleeping farmhouse.
"Ash nazg durbatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul."
One ring to rule them all and in the darkness bind them.