(no subject)
The people that I love are amazing in ways that they will never know; lifes been really good lately. Despite its goodness, I still find myself needing to vent because things have also been really disappointing lately. Disappointing because no one seems to want to let anything reach its potential. Part of me would rather have a constant neutral than these constant, intense ups and downs, but the bigger part of me knows that's stupid because I'd be missing out on a lot.
It's just that lately I feel like i've become as passive as I never want to be; I've resigned to just allowing myself to be pulled along for the ride, not reacting to anything because I know I'm passionate and if i react I'll just make things worse. It's easier to sit by and watch things slowly deteriorate than to do anything that will make it happen any quicker. Cant make it better, then dont make it worse. Just take it for what it is. nothing I do makes any difference and everything you don't do has been tearing me apart. I don't know why I never say the words i want to when I should. I dont know why i have to be the one to say something. why cant you say something?
Back to the happy stuff, eh? yeah. happy stuff like cookies n cream ice cream, the beach, 4 day weekends, spring break, saturday nights, steak n shake, ipods, clear skies, crayons, catch phrase, taboo, tshirts, and birthdays. ahem. unbirthdays.
Speaking of which, happy unbirthday to all,
and to all, a goodnight.
It's just that lately I feel like i've become as passive as I never want to be; I've resigned to just allowing myself to be pulled along for the ride, not reacting to anything because I know I'm passionate and if i react I'll just make things worse. It's easier to sit by and watch things slowly deteriorate than to do anything that will make it happen any quicker. Cant make it better, then dont make it worse. Just take it for what it is. nothing I do makes any difference and everything you don't do has been tearing me apart. I don't know why I never say the words i want to when I should. I dont know why i have to be the one to say something. why cant you say something?
Back to the happy stuff, eh? yeah. happy stuff like cookies n cream ice cream, the beach, 4 day weekends, spring break, saturday nights, steak n shake, ipods, clear skies, crayons, catch phrase, taboo, tshirts, and birthdays. ahem. unbirthdays.
Speaking of which, happy unbirthday to all,
and to all, a goodnight.