Re: A Letter to Ernie, 20th of May 1998.ernie_dt_macMarch 1 2008, 23:34:21 UTC
Michael,
Merlin, we did spend a lot of time together, didn't we. We've gotten a lot closer than we'd ever thought, you and I all of us. I'm glad to hear back from you, and I'm glad you're all right.
We're all coping. And what you're doing is hard work too - it's harder than what I'm doing, mixing potions and holding hands and wiping noses. So don't worry about me, my upper lip is quite stiff, thank you.
But if you need to get mushy, I'm here for you. That's what mates are for, after all.
You'd better come see me when you get up here, or else I'll have to kick your arse from here to Sunday. Just ask around, somebody will know where I am - I try to stay pretty visible. The patient load's gotten better than it was at first, so I've managed to move into a cot in the castle from a cot in a tent. Let me know when you're coming so I can get ready a cot near mine for you to crash in. I hope you don't mind, but there's quite a few of us sharing a room, more than in the dorms.
Otherwise, I might - no I wouldn't, what am I thinking
You'll be glad to know I sent an owl to your family. The owl came back without the note so I know they got it all right. I bet they're working on a letter for you right now. You must miss them a lot. Maybe soon you'll get to go see them again.
Just remember, let me know when you're coming so I can get things ready for you.
A Letter to Ernie, 24th of May 1998.augury_cornerMarch 2 2008, 00:08:42 UTC
Dear Ernie,
I'm sorry its been four whole days since we owled. Not that we haven't gone longer... and I wish I had a better excuse except that I've been doing a lot of thinking.
I got a letter from my parents that night after. Anyway... I'm sending you a copy of it... I think its got some very important things to say in it.
It got me thinking... especially that last part. I don't know if they told you but... I came by to see you on the 10th. I mean... it was your birthday and all. But they told me you'd fallen asleep. So I went back...
Anyway... I'm... babbling. Sorry... lack of sleep. I've been thinking about that last part. She said... "If you look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps until you find that last golden moment to that purest place in your heart, and move forward from there."
You are my last golden moment... Maybe I'm daft... maybe it was just the heat of the war and all the emotions. But its true. Look, I don't know if you feel the same way, but if you do meet me at the gates at 8 o'clock.
Letter to Michael sent May 26ernie_dt_macMarch 2 2008, 00:39:00 UTC
Dear Michael,
I really hope you opened this letter instead of burning it or tossing it away. You need to know why I wasn't there 2 nights ago. Merlin, I hope you weren't waiting for too long...
We had a patient come in on the 23rd, and I was treating him, and he started showing strange symptoms... it was dragon pox. They've had me in quarantine for three days, making sure it hadn't been passed on to me. It's tricky to detect in the earliest stages, and if it's not caught in time it can be deadly, and... I know you don't want to hear any of that. I just hope you believe me.
I'm just... sorry I wasn't there.
Since you've been honest with me, it's only fair that I be honest as well. I don't know what to think about what you told me. What was my last golden moment? Reuniting with Mum. Before that? You know what it was. The problem is I still don't know what that means. What I do know is that you're my friend, have been for a while, and that's more important to me than anything else. I know you were hurt before, and I would never hurt you. It wouldn't be fair to give you any false hope, and if I were to see you now, yes, I'd want to do it again, but I don't know if it would be for the wrong reasons or the right ones - and that wouldn't be fair to either of us.
Things are just so complicated now, and we don't have time to think about anything other than surviving and helping other people surviving. Maybe when our lives are a little more normal again, we'll have the chance to find out what's real and what isn't. We need time, and with You-Know-Who gone, we've suddenly got all the time in the world.
Just... give me time.
Your Mum's a wise woman. I think I'd like her.
I thought you might like to know I'll be staying here all summer. They're looking for volunteers to help rebuild Hogwarts, hoping they'll have it up enough to accept students in September. I want to go back, finish my NEWT year, maybe even go to St. Mungo's afterward to train to be a proper healer - I've found I've a talent for it, or at least I hope so. As I said, they're looking for volunteers - if you're interested.
I know this probably isn't what you'd hoped to hear, but the greatest gift I can give you is my honesty. I do miss you, and I do think of you often. I just... well, you know.
Letter to Ernie sent May 29th.augury_cornerMarch 2 2008, 00:51:14 UTC
Ern,
S'alright really. I was daft of course to think you could pull away like that. I got quite the earful after I disappeared and came back. They thought I was the victim of foul play... or a Deatheater ambush.
Yeah they're telling me the same here. They need volunteers. I already signed up. As for NEWTs.... don't really know yet to be honest. I don't really want to set foot back in that school once I've... you know... done the right thing. But maybe I just feel that way right now. I could change. Its all still sort of raw.
Merlin, we did spend a lot of time together, didn't we. We've gotten a lot closer than we'd ever thought, you and I all of us. I'm glad to hear back from you, and I'm glad you're all right.
We're all coping. And what you're doing is hard work too - it's harder than what I'm doing, mixing potions and holding hands and wiping noses. So don't worry about me, my upper lip is quite stiff, thank you.
But if you need to get mushy, I'm here for you. That's what mates are for, after all.
You'd better come see me when you get up here, or else I'll have to kick your arse from here to Sunday. Just ask around, somebody will know where I am - I try to stay pretty visible. The patient load's gotten better than it was at first, so I've managed to move into a cot in the castle from a cot in a tent. Let me know when you're coming so I can get ready a cot near mine for you to crash in. I hope you don't mind, but there's quite a few of us sharing a room, more than in the dorms.
Otherwise, I might - no I wouldn't, what am I thinking
You'll be glad to know I sent an owl to your family. The owl came back without the note so I know they got it all right. I bet they're working on a letter for you right now. You must miss them a lot. Maybe soon you'll get to go see them again.
Just remember, let me know when you're coming so I can get things ready for you.
I miss you Your friend,
Ernie
Reply
I'm sorry its been four whole days since we owled. Not that we haven't gone longer... and I wish I had a better excuse except that I've been doing a lot of thinking.
I got a letter from my parents that night after. Anyway... I'm sending you a copy of it... I think its got some very important things to say in it.
It got me thinking... especially that last part. I don't know if they told you but... I came by to see you on the 10th. I mean... it was your birthday and all. But they told me you'd fallen asleep. So I went back...
Anyway... I'm... babbling. Sorry... lack of sleep. I've been thinking about that last part. She said... "If you look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps until you find that last golden moment to that purest place in your heart, and move forward from there."
You are my last golden moment... Maybe I'm daft... maybe it was just the heat of the war and all the emotions. But its true. Look, I don't know if you feel the same way, but if you do meet me at the gates at 8 o'clock.
Your friend,
Michael
Reply
I really hope you opened this letter instead of burning it or tossing it away. You need to know why I wasn't there 2 nights ago. Merlin, I hope you weren't waiting for too long...
We had a patient come in on the 23rd, and I was treating him, and he started showing strange symptoms... it was dragon pox. They've had me in quarantine for three days, making sure it hadn't been passed on to me. It's tricky to detect in the earliest stages, and if it's not caught in time it can be deadly, and... I know you don't want to hear any of that. I just hope you believe me.
I'm just... sorry I wasn't there.
Since you've been honest with me, it's only fair that I be honest as well. I don't know what to think about what you told me. What was my last golden moment? Reuniting with Mum. Before that? You know what it was. The problem is I still don't know what that means. What I do know is that you're my friend, have been for a while, and that's more important to me than anything else. I know you were hurt before, and I would never hurt you. It wouldn't be fair to give you any false hope, and if I were to see you now, yes, I'd want to do it again, but I don't know if it would be for the wrong reasons or the right ones - and that wouldn't be fair to either of us.
Things are just so complicated now, and we don't have time to think about anything other than surviving and helping other people surviving. Maybe when our lives are a little more normal again, we'll have the chance to find out what's real and what isn't. We need time, and with You-Know-Who gone, we've suddenly got all the time in the world.
Just... give me time.
Your Mum's a wise woman. I think I'd like her.
I thought you might like to know I'll be staying here all summer. They're looking for volunteers to help rebuild Hogwarts, hoping they'll have it up enough to accept students in September. I want to go back, finish my NEWT year, maybe even go to St. Mungo's afterward to train to be a proper healer - I've found I've a talent for it, or at least I hope so. As I said, they're looking for volunteers - if you're interested.
I know this probably isn't what you'd hoped to hear, but the greatest gift I can give you is my honesty. I do miss you, and I do think of you often. I just... well, you know.
Your friend,
Ernie
Reply
S'alright really. I was daft of course to think you could pull away like that. I got quite the earful after I disappeared and came back. They thought I was the victim of foul play... or a Deatheater ambush.
Yeah they're telling me the same here. They need volunteers. I already signed up. As for NEWTs.... don't really know yet to be honest. I don't really want to set foot back in that school once I've... you know... done the right thing. But maybe I just feel that way right now. I could change. Its all still sort of raw.
Listen I'm being called away. I'll see you soon.
Michael
Reply
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