GREAT NEWS!!!!
I am fully incompetant.
Even better, Aleve makes it so I don't feel anything at all.
AT ALL!!!
So while I'm fully numb and jamming to the greatest hits collection of I Don't Give A Greater Fuck (Or Even a Lesser), here are some pointers:
1. If someone asks you a question, don't bitch them out. Don't use any emotion at all, regardless of how the question is being presented. It's called "being professional" and it gives you the upper hand when things get rough. Let them fight themselves and DON'T be the asshole.
(this is one of the best things I've learned in all of my years of working. It works in my private life, too.)
2. Lead by example. If you spazz out, everyone else will, too. If you stay calm and encourage thought, it may take time, but the brains will engage.
(I learned this one from working with horses first, and then applying it to doing workshops with large groups of people. If you show ANY emotion other than steadiness, you will have a clusterfuck.)
3. Motivation is key. You cannot create change unless you know WHY things aren't working.
(Straight up life lesson. Change starts at the root, not mid-stream.)
4. Everything is unpredictable. Be prepared, but stay relaxed and adaptable.
(Which is really easy to say, and why I tend to work better in an actual crisis than when things are fine. I can dream up all sorts of crises that are ocho bajillion times worse than what will actually happen. And thus, when OH SHIT happens, I manage to stay pretty clear-headed.)
5. You cannot fix anything when you are in a state of turmoil. Emotional, mental, physical... to respond to anything, you have to be able to think of your plan, consequences, delivery, and preferred outcome.
6. Always have a goal. Any time you prepare to interact, have a goal.
(I figured this out with my social fears. Now I really only talk to people when I have a goal. And when I have a goal, I can be assertive. Not wimpy. Not overly aggressive. Make my point, get the desired outcome, go home happy.)
7. Life is miserable enough without going out of your way to make things worse.
(Yodie told me this.)
8. If you ignore yourself, you'll go away.
(Another Yodie.)
9. Nothing comes from nothing- with no effort, your only success is your failure to try.
10. Surround yourself with positivity.
(Seriously- I can't tell you how much my quality of life changed when I got rid of toxic people and moved out of my mother's house. It was like I was born as a human.)
Even better, Aleve makes it so I don't feel anything at all.
AT ALL!!!
So while I'm fully numb and jamming to the greatest hits collection of I Don't Give A Greater Fuck (Or Even a Lesser), here are some pointers:
1. If someone asks you a question, don't bitch them out. Don't use any emotion at all, regardless of how the question is being presented. It's called "being professional" and it gives you the upper hand when things get rough. Let them fight themselves and DON'T be the asshole.
(this is one of the best things I've learned in all of my years of working. It works in my private life, too.)
2. Lead by example. If you spazz out, everyone else will, too. If you stay calm and encourage thought, it may take time, but the brains will engage.
(I learned this one from working with horses first, and then applying it to doing workshops with large groups of people. If you show ANY emotion other than steadiness, you will have a clusterfuck.)
3. Motivation is key. You cannot create change unless you know WHY things aren't working.
(Straight up life lesson. Change starts at the root, not mid-stream.)
4. Everything is unpredictable. Be prepared, but stay relaxed and adaptable.
(Which is really easy to say, and why I tend to work better in an actual crisis than when things are fine. I can dream up all sorts of crises that are ocho bajillion times worse than what will actually happen. And thus, when OH SHIT happens, I manage to stay pretty clear-headed.)
5. You cannot fix anything when you are in a state of turmoil. Emotional, mental, physical... to respond to anything, you have to be able to think of your plan, consequences, delivery, and preferred outcome.
6. Always have a goal. Any time you prepare to interact, have a goal.
(I figured this out with my social fears. Now I really only talk to people when I have a goal. And when I have a goal, I can be assertive. Not wimpy. Not overly aggressive. Make my point, get the desired outcome, go home happy.)
7. Life is miserable enough without going out of your way to make things worse.
(Yodie told me this.)
8. If you ignore yourself, you'll go away.
(Another Yodie.)
9. Nothing comes from nothing- with no effort, your only success is your failure to try.
10. Surround yourself with positivity.
(Seriously- I can't tell you how much my quality of life changed when I got rid of toxic people and moved out of my mother's house. It was like I was born as a human.)