As Yoda might have said, "Long time has been you not post, right, eh?" Indeed, Yoda, indeed.
Livejournal says it's been 105 weeks. I really don't want to figure that into months, but if there are four weeks in a month that would mean my last entry was about two years and two months ago. Hoooolllyyy shit. I just did what I said I wasn't, didn't I?
Well, it's time for an update I suppose. I don't know where I got this craving. I think it had something to do with the fact that I work with a bunch of idiots and rednecks, and oddly enough the two coincide more often than you might have first thought.
I work at a box plant, yes, that's right, a box plant. I make boxes, go figure. Yeah, it's manual labor. We've been on twelve hour shifts lately, but in a strange way, it's fun.
Do I have any real goals in life? Not really, other than to settle down eventually and have a family. And destroy the sworn enemy of my ninja clan, of course. That doesn't sound really all that attractive, does it?
Now, as you might expect, I don't really "fit in" persay in a really southern business. I've lived in the south my whole life, but I'm definitly not southern. I'm not ill-mannered, I don't smell and I don't shoot deer. But on the other hand, I do like sweet tea (that's tea with a fuckload of sugar for you northerners; all in all it's not the cleverest of southern inventions i.e. slavery). All in all, I'm the same person you guys all remember.
But in a way, alot has changed. Time for a........... CRASH COURSE OF MY LAST TWO YEARS! Or in anime, this would be the grueling 20 minute flashback before the badass fight scene.
I got kicked out of my house several times. I'm no longer in the Navy, obviously. I went to Virginia and back a few times, mainly as a result of me getting kicked out. Quit the pizza place I worked at because I had to go to Virginia after I got kicked out, DUH. I went through several fashion stages, hair lengths and crazy psycho ex-girlfriends that do an assload of drugs and cheat on me. But all in all, it's been good. I've got my xbox 360 and that's all that really matters in life, RIGHT!? And turkey sandwiches, mmmm... And I don't know if you guys remember that countdown I had for how many days I had left before I had to have sex with a certain someone, and well, the story ended happily. And now the badass anime fight scene will commence.
I guess I should update my profile picture with the only picture I have being from several months ago.
By the way, Phantom Hourglass for the DS rocks.
And I nominate MASS EFFECT game of the fuckin' year.
So back to work! I work with this guy on the machine that I'm on and just... wow. Have any of you seen the movie Idiocracy? I shit you not, I feel just like that. It's how Einstein felt, I'm sure. Everyone is so... dumb. I do crazy ass equations in my head and they look at me like I'm the fucking idiot. They even make gestures behind my back that indicate how crazy I am. It's so frustrating. Everyone is so fuckin' narrow-minded, it hurts. They think my fuckin' long sleeve flannel work clothes are "nice dress clothes." Needless to say I burned those clothes on the spot just to freak them out! So what if I like to dance while throwing corrugated board into a rediculously expensive machine that will explode when a fuckin two dollar air hose gets caught in the doorway? I'm serious, it's completely rediculous, these machines. It would take forever to explain to you how these work.
Generally there's a few things you need to know about rednecks. If you wear gloves, you're a pussy. If you structure sentences together properly, you're a fag. If you don't go into great detail about private matters, you're shunned.
He asks, "Why don't you want to tell me?" I said, "I don't think you understand. I'm nothing like you. The people that I associate with and have grown up with and been raised with would agree with me. Your morals are different than my own. There are certain things that are private, and showing you naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend is one of them." lololool Lots of my "jokes" go over their heads. But I know you guys get them. And if you don't, fuck that.
These are of course real scenarios. OMG REALITY JOURNAL!
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[Guy] So like, why are you wearing gloves?
[Me] Why does anyone wear gloves? To protect their hands from exterior elements.
[Guy] What?
[Me] (sigh) Because I haven't been wearing gloves for the past like two months and my hands are cut up and sore.
[Guy] That's weird.
[Me] Not when they get cut.
[Guy] Why are they cut?
[Me] A knife grenade.
[Guy] wtf?
[Me] Seriously. I just lost two halves of my family, so I'm not really in the mood to talk about it right now.
[Guy] oh srry to hear that
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[Guy] Do you like Hot Topic?
[Me] Not really, no. I don't like it because I think most of everything in there is retarded, and of course the fact that it tries to be a "non-conformist" outlet and is actually owned by one of the most conformist clothing companies in the world.
[Guy] I like it because that's like the only place you can buy man-shirts.
[Me] Man-shirts, huh? And why are they manly.
[Guy] They have man shit on them.
[Me] That sounds sick.
[Guy] Totally.
[Me] Sorry, let me rephrase that. That sounds retarded.
[Guy] Totally.
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[Guy] I hate the government.
[Me] Why?
[Guy] Because Bush is stupid and knows where Bin Ladin is.
[Me] That's a rediculous reason to hate the government.
[Guy] Is it?
[Me] Yes.............
[Guy] ...
[Me] Didn't think further than that, did you?
[Guy] It's stupid is all. All that matters is my family.
[Me] That's very noble of you, but that same government you hate is the same government that protects your family. You work at this box plant making a rediculous amount of money for the labor you do compared to other poorer overseas nations and because of that government, you have a house, a car, and a table with which to sit at and eat dinner happily with that family of yours and not in the streets fearing for your child's life.
[Guy] i still hate bush though
[Me] You should've just said that. The president isn't the government. THANKS TO DEMOCRACY! YAY!
(By the way, everyone about my age (20) is either married, divorced or has children. Creepy.)
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[Guy] Your woman is gonna like your paycheck this week.
[Me] What woman?
[Guy] Man?
[Me] No, no, no. Not that. I don't have a woman.
[Guy] No girlfriend?
[Me] No.
[Guy] No wife?
[Me] No?
[Guy] How old are you again?
[Me] 20...
[Guy] Shit, you're only a year younger than me and you're not married?
[Me] The obvious answer is no, but I really don't know how to respond to that question otherwise.
[Guy] You're strange.
[Me] Fuck you.
[Guy] Respect your elders! hahhaha im a year older than you.
[Me] omgomgomgomgoommogom fuck ur right so sorry sir :0
[Guy] WHO ARE YOU!?
So, Fruits Basket is fucking hilarious. If some of you haven't seen it, or read it, you definitly should.
I've gotta go for now and finish Mass Effect on Insanity! :0
By the way, I finished my story My Last Serenade and renamed it Dear Sweet Perfect, and put it into two parts, My Last Serenade and A World Without Wings. I have several ideas for my sequel that I've all got into at least a few chapters with before I lose interest in the idea.
Anyways, seeya for now. :)
STEVE OUT MOTHA FUCKAS!