Probably long overdue
For those of you who haven't heard, I have quit smoking.
Yes, impossible, I know. You're probably saying, "But Peter! You used to smoke 1.5 packs a day? How did you do it?"
Quite simply, I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to break my habitual surroundings for a week during thanksgiving. Living with my parents, out of my usual routine, I found it much easier to break the smoking habit. So, it's been 2 weeks so far, and I'm on the patch.
Now, the REAL reason for this post:
WEIRD NICOTINE PATCH SIDE EFFECTS!
1. Breakout. Yes, good old bad skin style breakouts. I think this is your body's way of ridding itself of the toxins taken in by smoking.
2. Vivid Dreams: Definitely patch related. I have had dreams I can remember every single night since I quit. Which is weird, since I haven't really dreamt in a long, long time. Or at least, none I can remember.
3. I got a cold: Maybe not related, but I have a feeling it was. Nose issues, even a cold sore. I NEVER get cold sores. Maybe not QUITE a cold sore, but a thing in my mouth. Icky, eww eww, I know.
And that's most of them. So if you're thinking of quitting smoking, beware, the patch is tres bizarre.
I feel positive, though. I feel like I can make the changes in my life I want to. I feel less trapped, except my weekdays are more painful than before.
Smoking was one of the last barriers between me and the rest of the world. You piss me off? I smoke. Cut me off? Smoke. Bored? Smoke. Feeling Rebellious and Glamourous? smoke. After Dinner? Breakfast? Lunch? A drink of water? Smoke.
So i've tried replacements. Gum, water, rubbing a rock (hand addiction, what a bitch) and journaling. Obviously, not here. it's hard to write what I really feel or really want to say when I think people are going to be reading it. Plus I feel more effective as a writer when I am actually writing, instead of typing. Call me a romantic. . .
Now it's even harder being away from LA. I want to go foreword, and yet I feel like here, It's much more difficult. then again, because there is so little to do, I have the option of improving myself. I'm working towards the gym membership (Tai-Bo isn't for me, after an hour I was sore, but not muscle sore, more like I sprained my body) and I've been better with eating healthier. During the week, though, it is difficult. Weekends are great because I feel happy. i think If I had an occupation I looked foreword to I would prolly be more capable of making the positive changes I want in my life.
It's funny. Living here in the Central Valley really makes LA look like paradise. And really, it's all in the perspective. Perception colors reality. Thinking something is impossible usually makes that thing impossible. Thinking LA is horrible makes it easier to accept that. So, think about LA in a positive light really makes the experience better.
Same for here. Of all the shit-holes in the Central Valley, I'm glad I ended up here. I think this really is the nicest little town around. But, if i wanted to, i could try to make it miserable. It's all the the mindset of the observer.
Like lemons and lemonade kinda thing. I'm trying to make life more positive by maintaining a positive outlook, but it's hard without my friends and family.
I miss you all, and I hope to be with you soon, in the coming year.
Yay for progress!!
;)
Yes, impossible, I know. You're probably saying, "But Peter! You used to smoke 1.5 packs a day? How did you do it?"
Quite simply, I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to break my habitual surroundings for a week during thanksgiving. Living with my parents, out of my usual routine, I found it much easier to break the smoking habit. So, it's been 2 weeks so far, and I'm on the patch.
Now, the REAL reason for this post:
WEIRD NICOTINE PATCH SIDE EFFECTS!
1. Breakout. Yes, good old bad skin style breakouts. I think this is your body's way of ridding itself of the toxins taken in by smoking.
2. Vivid Dreams: Definitely patch related. I have had dreams I can remember every single night since I quit. Which is weird, since I haven't really dreamt in a long, long time. Or at least, none I can remember.
3. I got a cold: Maybe not related, but I have a feeling it was. Nose issues, even a cold sore. I NEVER get cold sores. Maybe not QUITE a cold sore, but a thing in my mouth. Icky, eww eww, I know.
And that's most of them. So if you're thinking of quitting smoking, beware, the patch is tres bizarre.
I feel positive, though. I feel like I can make the changes in my life I want to. I feel less trapped, except my weekdays are more painful than before.
Smoking was one of the last barriers between me and the rest of the world. You piss me off? I smoke. Cut me off? Smoke. Bored? Smoke. Feeling Rebellious and Glamourous? smoke. After Dinner? Breakfast? Lunch? A drink of water? Smoke.
So i've tried replacements. Gum, water, rubbing a rock (hand addiction, what a bitch) and journaling. Obviously, not here. it's hard to write what I really feel or really want to say when I think people are going to be reading it. Plus I feel more effective as a writer when I am actually writing, instead of typing. Call me a romantic. . .
Now it's even harder being away from LA. I want to go foreword, and yet I feel like here, It's much more difficult. then again, because there is so little to do, I have the option of improving myself. I'm working towards the gym membership (Tai-Bo isn't for me, after an hour I was sore, but not muscle sore, more like I sprained my body) and I've been better with eating healthier. During the week, though, it is difficult. Weekends are great because I feel happy. i think If I had an occupation I looked foreword to I would prolly be more capable of making the positive changes I want in my life.
It's funny. Living here in the Central Valley really makes LA look like paradise. And really, it's all in the perspective. Perception colors reality. Thinking something is impossible usually makes that thing impossible. Thinking LA is horrible makes it easier to accept that. So, think about LA in a positive light really makes the experience better.
Same for here. Of all the shit-holes in the Central Valley, I'm glad I ended up here. I think this really is the nicest little town around. But, if i wanted to, i could try to make it miserable. It's all the the mindset of the observer.
Like lemons and lemonade kinda thing. I'm trying to make life more positive by maintaining a positive outlook, but it's hard without my friends and family.
I miss you all, and I hope to be with you soon, in the coming year.
Yay for progress!!
;)