(no subject)
Rough night. Who woulda thunk that a stupid fucking phone, that I fucking hate would cause me to sob. It's just that the phone and I have been through a lot together. Its helped me through countless hours of monotony and boredom. Its GPS has guided me near and far. Its ring and beeps once harbored good tidings.Yes, I am crying partially over lost text messages. Fucking pathetic. But so is my life as of late. I know, I know- it's not that bad. But life is gang-raping up on me right now and I am taking it like a little bitch. The Focus needs $1900 in repairs. I spent the $100 I was so proud of having saved on my new fucking phone. Sallie Mae has me in a state of indefinite indentured servitude.All the while I have to put the needs of my two charges, my mother, and my family in the forefront of my mind.Yet I still feel I have the autonomy of a five year old. I live a live that is almost dark enough to be a Showtime series, but deemed way to boring to amuse any viewers. Somethings gotta give. My situation or my mindset or my luck has to get better. I don't know how much lower I can go.