Life is Beautiful....
From an outsiders perspective, it would be easy to think that my life is mundane... a grind... monotonous.... in other words, an actualization of my worst nightmare. I wake up at about 6am to be at work by 7, Monday through Friday, week after week, month after month. I've fallen asleep next to the same man every night for more than 7 years. I'm almost 29 years old, living with three other people, excluding my husband, in a house that I don't even own. But does this kind of life really have to be a nightmare? There was once a time when I thought that this life would kill me. Fact of the matter is, the opposite has happened. Even with "daddy issues" plaguing me on a daily basis, I have never been happier. What's more amazing, things can still get even better. Fan-freaking-tastic.
I love my job. I don't mind going to work everyday. Better yet, I love the people I work with. It makes everyday life more of a laugh than a grind. And even though the pay isn't great, it pays the bills and I would rather work at a job I love that pays less than a job I loath where I'd make more.
If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I would ever marry, I would have probably laughed at you. Until I met Jason, I didn't think I was cut out for monogamy. Don't get me wrong. I've been in a few exclusive relationships. But none that I thought would last a lifetime. Few things make me happier than waking up next to my wonderful husband. He's sweet, attentive, and so patient with me and my insanity. I still get chills when he kisses me. He loves me. He loves my family. I love him. I love his family. I'm so lucky... So's he :)
There has been anthropological debate on whether it is more human in nature to grow up and live in a village (a more "primitive" way of life), or individually in nuclear family units (more common in most western cultures). I've found that living in the village of this house has been one of the healthiest moves I've had in some time. No one cooks unless they've made enough to feed the entire house. Most evenings are spent having dinner and watching TV or movies together. We help each other out. We support each other. And though I don't plan on living here for the rest of my life, it's the perfect place for me right now.
Anyone who has read my last few blogs, knows about the rocky relationship that I share with my father has been rocky at best. This, however, does not mean that my family is broken. If anything, it's brought the rest of us closer together. Over the last few days, my brother, sister, mother, and I have been getting some pretty nasty phone calls, emails and text messages from my dad. The usual has been accused. We are ungrateful, awful children. We have been a waste of his time and money. His unhappiness is directly correlated with the fact that we exist. My mother is a money hungry and evil woman out to destroy him and his new girlfriend, etc... But a phone call from one of his advisors put my mind at ease. They assured me that my father is lashing out at us because he's desperate for anyone to be on his side. His way of doing so is to "scare us into loving him". Though ineffective, its the only option he knows. No matter how much I assure him that I do not want to cut him out of my life, he is unwilling to admit any wrong doing or apologize for the things he's said. In fact, he thinks he is entitled to his treatment of us because we deserve it. The rest of us rallied to each other's sides to support each other. I understand my dad has some issues to work through, stuff I can not control. But that's okay. I'm strong. I have a wonderful support system in my family and friends. I have faith. I have hope. I have love. What more does one need for happiness?
"I came to this world with nothing. And I'll leave with nothing but love. Everything else is just borrowed."
I love my job. I don't mind going to work everyday. Better yet, I love the people I work with. It makes everyday life more of a laugh than a grind. And even though the pay isn't great, it pays the bills and I would rather work at a job I love that pays less than a job I loath where I'd make more.
If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I would ever marry, I would have probably laughed at you. Until I met Jason, I didn't think I was cut out for monogamy. Don't get me wrong. I've been in a few exclusive relationships. But none that I thought would last a lifetime. Few things make me happier than waking up next to my wonderful husband. He's sweet, attentive, and so patient with me and my insanity. I still get chills when he kisses me. He loves me. He loves my family. I love him. I love his family. I'm so lucky... So's he :)
There has been anthropological debate on whether it is more human in nature to grow up and live in a village (a more "primitive" way of life), or individually in nuclear family units (more common in most western cultures). I've found that living in the village of this house has been one of the healthiest moves I've had in some time. No one cooks unless they've made enough to feed the entire house. Most evenings are spent having dinner and watching TV or movies together. We help each other out. We support each other. And though I don't plan on living here for the rest of my life, it's the perfect place for me right now.
Anyone who has read my last few blogs, knows about the rocky relationship that I share with my father has been rocky at best. This, however, does not mean that my family is broken. If anything, it's brought the rest of us closer together. Over the last few days, my brother, sister, mother, and I have been getting some pretty nasty phone calls, emails and text messages from my dad. The usual has been accused. We are ungrateful, awful children. We have been a waste of his time and money. His unhappiness is directly correlated with the fact that we exist. My mother is a money hungry and evil woman out to destroy him and his new girlfriend, etc... But a phone call from one of his advisors put my mind at ease. They assured me that my father is lashing out at us because he's desperate for anyone to be on his side. His way of doing so is to "scare us into loving him". Though ineffective, its the only option he knows. No matter how much I assure him that I do not want to cut him out of my life, he is unwilling to admit any wrong doing or apologize for the things he's said. In fact, he thinks he is entitled to his treatment of us because we deserve it. The rest of us rallied to each other's sides to support each other. I understand my dad has some issues to work through, stuff I can not control. But that's okay. I'm strong. I have a wonderful support system in my family and friends. I have faith. I have hope. I have love. What more does one need for happiness?
"I came to this world with nothing. And I'll leave with nothing but love. Everything else is just borrowed."