Fic: Cure For Insomnia by keefaq (PG)
Title: Cure For Insomnia
Author: keefaq
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Completed : Dec. 2007
Disclaimer: Transformative work
Word Count- <2000 words
Note: I'm not sure if this fits the exact definition of an episode tag because
I'm not sure what the exact definition is, but this starts at the end of Miller's Crossing.
Spoilers: Maybe a little for Miller's Crossing
The first time it happened it really was an accident. Rodney had just gotten back to Atlantis after the whole horrible kidnapping fiasco, and Sheppard was pushing his food around on his plate because the distract yourself by getting something to eat plan wasn’t working for him. Rodney was uncharacteristically silent, but at least he’d gotten the message about the things they didn’t need to talk about. When Rodney mentioned he’d brought some new movies back from earth he jumped at the invitation to go back to Rodney’s room to watch something, not even bothering to ask what it was.
So they were sitting side-by-side watching the first time it happened. They hadn’t planned it or anything. Sheppard hadn’t been sleeping well, and Rodney looked like he was in the same boat, so when Sheppard suddenly jerked awake in the wee hours of the morning and realized he’d drifted off watching the movie, he wasn’t surprised to glance over and see Rodney slumped down in his bed sound asleep. The little snoring noises were oddly relaxing, so Sheppard rolled over onto his stomach and went back to sleep.
It was a little strange in the morning. Rodney was awake when Sheppard opened his eyes. He looked much better rested than he had for a while though. “What time is it?”
“Almost six.”
Sheppard shrugged. “Sorry, I guess I was more tired than I realized. I’ll get out of your hair.” He got up and put his shoes on.
“It’s ok,” Rodney said.
Sheppard nodded. “I’ll see you later,” and he ducked out the door.
The next two nights felt more lonely than usual and during the day Rodney seemed to be getting more and more snippy. After a particularly childish exchange of insults, Sheppard asked him what the hell was wrong.
“Nothing." He pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose and shook his head slightly back and forth. "I just, um, I haven’t been sleeping much. Insomnia.”
Sheppard narrowed his eyes. “I think you’re making that up. You sleep pretty good.”
“Yeah? Well, for your information that was the first good rest I’ve had since we found out about the Wraith,” Rodney said. “Excuse me if having an armed guard while I sleep makes it easier for me to relax.”
Which remark gave Sheppard a funny feeling in his stomach. Not the ha-ha kind of funny either. So he found himself at Rodney’s door around midnight that night, and after ascertaining, that, yes, yes, he was still having trouble sleeping, he lay down beside him fully dressed except for his shoes, and fell asleep faster than Rodney did.
In the morning it seemed almost normal, so after that Sheppard just starting showing up every night or sometimes following Rodney home after work and watching movies before going to bed. In Rodney’s bed. Rodney was getting a lot more sleep and acting a lot less snippy, and Sheppard himself felt unusually well rested for someone who was sleeping in his clothes every night. They didn’t talk about it, which was part of the goodness of the arrangement.
One night Sheppard brought along a small overnight bag, just so he could, you know, shower and put on clean clothes in the morning. And shave and stuff. Some of his books were getting scattered around the room, too, but Rodney didn’t seem to mind. It was relaxing sitting on the bed reading while Rodney tapped away on his laptop, and he didn’t seem to be interfering with Rodney’s concentration or anything. They didn’t talk much, and it was kind of a pleasant way to spend his evenings.
After a while, Rodney consolidated the junk in two of his drawers so John could take his clothing off the chair and store it. It was a small room and his clothing was in the way, so it only made sense.
****
One morning when John went out for his run he didn’t have to go back to his room at all because Ronon was waiting for him at McKay’s door.
Which was not good.
“How did you, uh, how did you know I was here?” he asked.
Ronon shrugged. “You’re always here.”
“I didn’t think anyone noticed that.” And when Ronon didn’t seem to think that required an answer, “Are people noticing that?”
Another shrug. “That you’re doing McKay? Some, I guess. Why?”
He could feel a flush spreading up his neck. “Ronon, I’m not doing McKay. Jesus. He’s stressed out and I’m just, uh, I’m just keeping him company so he can get some sleep.”
Had Ronon always had such a shrugging habit? “It’s working pretty good.”
“Yeah, well… look, I can’t afford to have people thinking Rodney and I are, uh, involved like that.”
“Why not?”
“Well, for one thing, it’s against the code of our military.”
Ronon snorted. “That’s dumb.”
****
John found Rodney in his lab, far enough off by himself to blurt out, “People think we’re sleeping together.”
Rodney didn’t even look up. “We are sleeping together.”
“Shhh,” even though he’d already made sure no one was close enough to hear them. “Knock it off, you know what I mean.” He lowered his voice even more. “ They think we’re having sex.”
“Are there blow jobs involved?”
“What?!”
Rodney was laughing. “Sometimes it’s just too easy to jerk your cord. In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t care what people think.”
John went back to his own work. He had more important things to think about than blowjobs.
That evening he brought Teyla and Ronon along to Rodney’s room for movie night. He thought about sitting on the chair to watch, but that was just silly. Teyla always sat on the chair while he shared the bed with Rodney, and to change now would be dumb. So he propped up in his usual spot and Ronon sprawled all over the floor at Teyla’s feet. It was fun, and having the team all together took the weird vibes away for a while. Ronon left early, but everything was still ok until Teyla got up to leave. She hugged Rodney, then patted John’s arm and said, “Have a good rest, my friends.” Like she just assumed that they were going to rest or something after she left. Like they would naturally be resting together.
He followed Rodney into the bathroom. “What did that mean?” he asked as Rodney spread some special baking soda toothpaste thing from a jar onto his toothbrush.
“What?”
“That thing with Teyla.”
Rodney raised his eyebrows. “Thing with Teyla?”
“She thinks we’re sleeping together, doesn’t she?”
Rodney put his toothbrush down and scratched his head. “Haven’t we already had this conversation?”
John couldn’t think of anything else to say, so he just watched as Rodney picked up his toothbrush and began brushing vigorously. He watched while Rodney rinsed his mouth out and spit. He watched until Rodney looked up impatiently. “What? You’re not satisfied with just sleeping? Look, you’re not going to be able to draw on my vast relationship experience here. I have no more idea what we’re doing than you do. Now do you want to talk about our relationship or do you want to go to bed?” He winced. “To sleep, I mean, to sleep. I’m tired, it’s been a long day, and I need to get some rest now.” He put his toothbrush away and went out into the bedroom, pulling off his clothes quickly and crawling into bed in his boxers.
It was way past time for John to go back to sleeping in his own quarters again; he knew that. But he didn’t want to. He brushed his own teeth and then lay down next to Rodney, close but carefully not touching, fully clothed as usual. “Has anyone said anything to you about us?”
Rodney sighed. “No. Well, just Radek.”
“About blowjobs?”
“What? No, no, nothing that specific.”
“You just thought that part up yourself?”
The silence went on so long he thought Rodney wasn’t going to answer, but then he sat up in bed and flung his arms out. “Yes, fine, I think about blowjobs. I think about a lot of stuff. It’s not like I expect the things I think about to ever actually happen.”
He could hear his heart beating. Things were getting out of hand, and he needed to explain to Rodney that it was important for the safety of everyone in the city to have a well rested chief scientist, and it was his job to keep everyone as safe as he could. “I think about them, too,” he said instead.
Rodney slid back down on the bed and closed his eyes without saying anything else, so he turned over onto his side and tried to go to sleep, but even with Rodney’s light snoring as white noise it took him a long time to drift off.
The next morning Rodney seemed distracted and not as well rested as he’d been recently. What with one thing and another they didn’t meet up during the day, so around supper time John decided to head down to the lab to make sure Rodney took time to eat. But Rodney wasn’t there, and Radek acted shifty when John asked where he’d gone, claiming he wasn’t sure.
As he left the lab he passed Miko going in. “Rodney has gone to see Katie,” she said, before he could even ask, and he had to turn his head away from her because he suddenly had no control at all over his expression. He mumbled something and changed direction, automatically heading for the privacy of his room, then stopped to try to remember where he’d originally intended to go. How the fuck could he have so completely forgotten about Katie? And how was he gong to stand this? He felt like he couldn't stand it, couldn't give up what had never existed outside his own imagination. He put Ronon in charge of the drills he’d been intending to supervise and spent the rest of the evening hiding in his room because he was a complete and total fucking idiot.
****
He was already in bed, though still wide-awake when Rodney barreled in without bothering to knock. “What do you think you’re doing?” he demanded with his usual tact.
“Sleeping?”
Rodney made a little huffing noise and put his hands on his hips. “Oh, don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean. Come on, what’s going on? You’re freaking out about that little blowjob conversation, aren’t you? Look I’m not going to attack you. We don’t have to have blowjobs or do anything you don’t want to do. I’m sorry. I never should have said- ”
He tried to shout over Rodney’s badgering. “Rodney, SHUT UP,” which earned him the stubborn little chin tilt.
“I will not shut up unless you start talking sense to me.”
John groaned and sat up because he knew Rodney’s bulldog mood too well to think he was going to be able to avoid what promised to be a painful and humiliating conversation. Rodney was not going to go away and let him quietly get over this mess. But just because he realized he had to say something didn’t mean he had any idea exactly what to say. So he just sat and glared.
Rodney face crumpled. “Don’t do this to me,” he said. “I just broke up with my girlfriend for you.”
And just that quickly, John found the glare sliding off his face. He was feeling a little bit, no, a whole lot better. “You what?”
“I broke up with Katie, you moron. What was all that talk about blowjobs for anyway? Was that a joke?”
“No, Rodney, no, it wasn’t a joke.” He was off the bed and impulsively pulling Rodney into him before he’d finished speaking.
Rodney was mumbling something like, “Thank the fucking saints in heaven,” when he finally got his mouth over Rodney’s and stopped the talking.
Turned out there were a whole lot of other things Rodney would do in bed with John besides sleep, and none of them required a lot of discussion.