Learn to lie better next time.
Ladies and gents, it has happened: I got hit on with a fake palm reading.
At my figure drawing sessions, I sometimes run into a sleazy gent to whom I shall refer as "Captain Douchebag." He's fairly chattty, so I'd talked with him plenty of times before this hilarious incident.
On the night in question, I was sitting with an art group friend of mine, who was recommending a massage therapist for me--Captain Douchebag was lingering around us as I excitedly relayed how badly I needed my hands worked on. At that, he started massaging my left hand, which, not gonna lie, felt pretty fabulous. Then, he looked at my palm a moment, traced out one of the deeper lines on it, and made a comment--obviously intended as a palm-reading lead-in--that had nothing to do with the line he had picked.
I knew immediately, and with delight--that he he was going to attempt a FAKE PALM-READING SEDUCTION!! So I asked, very innocently, "Why, what do you mean?"
"Your palm," replied Captain Douchebag, as he flashed a smile and a heaping helping of his exotic ethnic charm.
"But, Capt. D," I said, just as innocently, "That's my head line, and you aren't looking at the correct hand!"
The OH-SHIT look that crossed his face as he realized that I do, in fact, know about palm-reading and had disrupted his game was totally amazing.
I will say this for the man, he recovered his senses very quickly and was able to chat with me about palmistry for a bit. I probably gave him fodder for his next attempted fake palm-reading seduction.
EDIT: I'm not sure how I forgot this magnificent detail, but it must be included. After our palmistry conversation, I guess Capt. D-bag couldn't resist one last try. He traced out the angle at which my thumb juts out from my hand, then said "This is really rare. It's means you're a sensual person--I have that, too."
Then he went back to his easel.
At my figure drawing sessions, I sometimes run into a sleazy gent to whom I shall refer as "Captain Douchebag." He's fairly chattty, so I'd talked with him plenty of times before this hilarious incident.
On the night in question, I was sitting with an art group friend of mine, who was recommending a massage therapist for me--Captain Douchebag was lingering around us as I excitedly relayed how badly I needed my hands worked on. At that, he started massaging my left hand, which, not gonna lie, felt pretty fabulous. Then, he looked at my palm a moment, traced out one of the deeper lines on it, and made a comment--obviously intended as a palm-reading lead-in--that had nothing to do with the line he had picked.
I knew immediately, and with delight--that he he was going to attempt a FAKE PALM-READING SEDUCTION!! So I asked, very innocently, "Why, what do you mean?"
"Your palm," replied Captain Douchebag, as he flashed a smile and a heaping helping of his exotic ethnic charm.
"But, Capt. D," I said, just as innocently, "That's my head line, and you aren't looking at the correct hand!"
The OH-SHIT look that crossed his face as he realized that I do, in fact, know about palm-reading and had disrupted his game was totally amazing.
I will say this for the man, he recovered his senses very quickly and was able to chat with me about palmistry for a bit. I probably gave him fodder for his next attempted fake palm-reading seduction.
EDIT: I'm not sure how I forgot this magnificent detail, but it must be included. After our palmistry conversation, I guess Capt. D-bag couldn't resist one last try. He traced out the angle at which my thumb juts out from my hand, then said "This is really rare. It's means you're a sensual person--I have that, too."
Then he went back to his easel.