Things We Can Smash
Title: Things We Can Smash
Rating: PG-13 (for language)
Genre: Gen
Characters/Pairings: Jasper, slight Jasper/Alice
Spoilers: General series, also based off comments made by SM
Summary: Everyone has secrets. Some are just more dangerous than others.
Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related belongs to Stephanie Meyer, and is used without permission here. I, however, do not claim what is theirs and only what is mine. No infringement is intended and not used for monetary gain.
Notes: Unbetaed (anyone up for the job? :) ) Cross posted. Prompt "Secret" for twilight20
Things We Can Smash
They don’t know.
They can’t know because it’s taboo, it’s wrong, it would shatter their family, Forks, my current life, if they ever found out, if someone besides Edward, who keeps other’s thoughts to himself, could break into my head and tear out the secrets I keep. And I can’t bear to think what would happen if Alice found out just how strong the urges can be. She’d follow me to the ends of the world, and I her, but this would test that bond too much, I fear.
I still want human blood.
It’s not all the time, mind you. It comes in spurts, in gusts, first strong then fading away until I don’t need to skip school and hide in the forest, head on my knees. There are times as I sit in class, listening to whatever mundane mortal attempt to explain the multilayered horrors of the world, when the sensations strike me and I lust after the taste of the metallic juices that are flowing delicately beneath the fragile skin of whatever teenager sits next to me, oblivious to the danger that is coiled next to them. I want to hear them scream in defeat and beg and know that there’s another level to this food chain before I snap their porcelain bones into hundreds of fragments.
But then I’ll remember that I too, was human once. Once upon a time, but my life is no fairy tale. Once my heart beat strongly beneath ribs and neurons crackled and I didn’t fucking sparkle. Once I had hope for the future, for the revolution of seasons, for the inevitable aging process. I grow disgusted with my present self and my weaknesses and how Edward looks at me through half-lidded eyes, knowing my sins.
So I keep it a secret, this thirst, this ravaging bloodlust, and pray to whatever benevolent higher power that listens to the damned that I’ll never expose the Cullens because of it. My life isn’t a nice bedtime story, but it doesn’t need to smash anyone else's life into pieces and make it hell.
Rating: PG-13 (for language)
Genre: Gen
Characters/Pairings: Jasper, slight Jasper/Alice
Spoilers: General series, also based off comments made by SM
Summary: Everyone has secrets. Some are just more dangerous than others.
Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related belongs to Stephanie Meyer, and is used without permission here. I, however, do not claim what is theirs and only what is mine. No infringement is intended and not used for monetary gain.
Notes: Unbetaed (anyone up for the job? :) ) Cross posted. Prompt "Secret" for twilight20
Things We Can Smash
They don’t know.
They can’t know because it’s taboo, it’s wrong, it would shatter their family, Forks, my current life, if they ever found out, if someone besides Edward, who keeps other’s thoughts to himself, could break into my head and tear out the secrets I keep. And I can’t bear to think what would happen if Alice found out just how strong the urges can be. She’d follow me to the ends of the world, and I her, but this would test that bond too much, I fear.
I still want human blood.
It’s not all the time, mind you. It comes in spurts, in gusts, first strong then fading away until I don’t need to skip school and hide in the forest, head on my knees. There are times as I sit in class, listening to whatever mundane mortal attempt to explain the multilayered horrors of the world, when the sensations strike me and I lust after the taste of the metallic juices that are flowing delicately beneath the fragile skin of whatever teenager sits next to me, oblivious to the danger that is coiled next to them. I want to hear them scream in defeat and beg and know that there’s another level to this food chain before I snap their porcelain bones into hundreds of fragments.
But then I’ll remember that I too, was human once. Once upon a time, but my life is no fairy tale. Once my heart beat strongly beneath ribs and neurons crackled and I didn’t fucking sparkle. Once I had hope for the future, for the revolution of seasons, for the inevitable aging process. I grow disgusted with my present self and my weaknesses and how Edward looks at me through half-lidded eyes, knowing my sins.
So I keep it a secret, this thirst, this ravaging bloodlust, and pray to whatever benevolent higher power that listens to the damned that I’ll never expose the Cullens because of it. My life isn’t a nice bedtime story, but it doesn’t need to smash anyone else's life into pieces and make it hell.