Christmas Post/Getting ready for the new year.
Things.
I am not a collector in any sense, really. Once I've enjoyed an object I'm ok with getting rid of it. I DO hate to waste, so there are plenty of half-empty bottles of this or that around but I don't really appreciate the clutter. I don't like to receive trinkets because I largely think they just take up space that would look nicer if nothing was there at all. This isn't a blanket statement; books are different, awards are different, etc - but these items are more like a physical representation of a life achievement.
"yay I read this!"
"yay I did all of that work!"
Things that are tools or have a purpose are the kinds of things I hoard, unfortunately. Even clothing I've barely ever worn.
I'm more about novelty. Unusual surroundings and possessions, please.
I really really like beautiful things. I have beautiful friends. I really love art and makeup and music and looking at fashion (but not trying it, I'm too addicted to comfort). Maybe I collect beauty.
Self.
I'm really excited and optimistic about the next chapter. I hung up a photo of me hugging Rachel from the day that I graduated HCC. I did a lot and I want to eclipse all of it.
I really like to be myself. I don't mind the spotlight as long as I get to really be me.
>>>>> fashion _ I have had a hard time dressing myself lately because I am in a weird transition period in my life again and, weight management issues aside (where I am struggling at the moment from not enjoying running anymore and not replacing this activity with anything else) I kind of feel like a patchwork person finding a niche again. I bought a few "expensive" (>$100) blazers and some nice tops for teaching next semester. I feel like my clothes do a good job of broadcasting how "youthfully enthusiastic" I am and at the same time I need to CARRY myself in a way that screams "I am not fucking around and I know my shit".
>>>>> mental space _ Practicing being nice to myself. I really really lack a lot of the discipline I had worked very hard on cultivating and a lot of my immediate issues pretty much stem hierarchically to this fact. So, here is an exercise I used to practice. Nice words about myself: I have courage. I have a lot of integrity. I strive for independence and I know when to accept help from others. I am original and inventive. I am courteous. I am adaptable and intelligent. I am passionate about many things.
I am not a collector in any sense, really. Once I've enjoyed an object I'm ok with getting rid of it. I DO hate to waste, so there are plenty of half-empty bottles of this or that around but I don't really appreciate the clutter. I don't like to receive trinkets because I largely think they just take up space that would look nicer if nothing was there at all. This isn't a blanket statement; books are different, awards are different, etc - but these items are more like a physical representation of a life achievement.
"yay I read this!"
"yay I did all of that work!"
Things that are tools or have a purpose are the kinds of things I hoard, unfortunately. Even clothing I've barely ever worn.
I'm more about novelty. Unusual surroundings and possessions, please.
I really really like beautiful things. I have beautiful friends. I really love art and makeup and music and looking at fashion (but not trying it, I'm too addicted to comfort). Maybe I collect beauty.
Self.
I'm really excited and optimistic about the next chapter. I hung up a photo of me hugging Rachel from the day that I graduated HCC. I did a lot and I want to eclipse all of it.
I really like to be myself. I don't mind the spotlight as long as I get to really be me.
>>>>> fashion _ I have had a hard time dressing myself lately because I am in a weird transition period in my life again and, weight management issues aside (where I am struggling at the moment from not enjoying running anymore and not replacing this activity with anything else) I kind of feel like a patchwork person finding a niche again. I bought a few "expensive" (>$100) blazers and some nice tops for teaching next semester. I feel like my clothes do a good job of broadcasting how "youthfully enthusiastic" I am and at the same time I need to CARRY myself in a way that screams "I am not fucking around and I know my shit".
>>>>> mental space _ Practicing being nice to myself. I really really lack a lot of the discipline I had worked very hard on cultivating and a lot of my immediate issues pretty much stem hierarchically to this fact. So, here is an exercise I used to practice. Nice words about myself: I have courage. I have a lot of integrity. I strive for independence and I know when to accept help from others. I am original and inventive. I am courteous. I am adaptable and intelligent. I am passionate about many things.