She gave me a particular horse to ride because his barrel is narrow and I'm short. Maybe also because he is a horse they use for beginners, but I don't know, she didn't explain that part. When I tried to tell her why I believed I was having trouble and tried to tell her what I wanted to work on (balance, posture), she said, "no, I think you are scared of going fast, so I'll keep you on this horse since he is slow." But a) I'm not scared of going fast - I just want to be balanced when I do it, and be balanced through all the transitions and b) in the next breath, she is telling me that she is going to force me to go fast anyway! If I was scared of going fast, I would be weirded out that she would force me before I've built up more confidence, and besides that, the whole contradiction of I'll put you on a slow horse so you don't go fast/I'm going to force you to go fast seems weird to me.
I was thinking of doing test lessons with other people to see how I liked them. It sounds like this might be more common, which is good! I was afraid that some places wouldn't like me to do that.
OK, so your conversation with this trainer indicates that she isn't hearing what you're saying, *and* that even if the problem you were having was the one she thought you had, she wouldn't be sensitive to it.
I was thinking of doing test lessons with other people to see how I liked them. It sounds like this might be more common, which is good! I was afraid that some places wouldn't like me to do that.
ETA: Thanks for the rest of your advice too!
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As Dan Savage would say, DTMFA.
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