It's not that you're not pretty, it's just
Title: It’s not that you’re not pretty, it’s just
Summary: A girl gets a crush on Blaine. Blaine is oblivious. Kurt finds it completely hilarious.
Author's notes: I was kind of having a bad day, so I tried to cheer myself up with writing. I'm not that pleased with it, but it allowed me to put in a Star Wars reference, so I'm good! My life is now complete. Yay!
Also, I have a quick question about the sequel to The Light at the End. Would you guys like me to post the first chapter soon and have random updates, or would you rather have me write the entire thing and post on a later date? Like, Christmas later?
Anyway, let me know what you think! I always love hearing from you guys!
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.
Her named was Amelia.
She was what most boys in high school would consider "tapable". She had chopped, light brown hair, a pretty face, a rather nice chest and beautiful blue eyes. Her laugh was bright and she was an amazing dancer - like a gazelle.
Well, at least that what Blaine's friends kept telling him when they stopped by to visit at work. Every time she'd walk by, depending on who was visiting him, Jeff, Nick, or Thad would immediately stop talking about what topic they'd been speaking on and stare after her. All Blaine could do was shake his head. "You guys are crazy," he told Thad one day.
"Blaine, she's gorgeous!" Thad said, slapping him upside the head.
"Um, ow," he said, attempting to reach up and rub his head. He was unable to, unfortunately, because at that moment Thad grabbed his head and yanked it to the side.
"Look. Isn't that the most beautiful sight that you've ever seen?"
Blaine looked, oh, he looked alright. He knew that he was supposed to be looking at Amelia bending down, her hair flipped over to the side and her knees bent, taking a drink of water from the water fountain. But what caught his attention was the tall boy wearing a short sleeved shirt with a low v-cut walking towards him with coffee in his hands.
"Oh, Thad... That is the most beautiful sight that I've ever seen."
Thad hummed in agreement before letting his head go and saying, in a rather bored tone. "Oh, and Kurt said he was going to drop by sometime today. I'm going to go stare at her for a while, see ya!"
Blaine was still staring at pure happiness. "Mm, sure. Go make yourself look desperate. Have fun."
Thad was gone by the time Kurt reached him, which Blaine was thankful for, because if he'd been there Blaine might not have been able to smother Kurt with kisses. Blaine was a boy. A teenage boy. He had needs that only Kurt could fill. Thad might not have appreciated that.
When Kurt pulled away (which Blaine was not happy about because Kurt's lips were delicious) he had a rather shocked look on his face, but he was smiling nonetheless. "Well hello to you, too," he said breathlessly, handing Blaine the cup of coffee.
"Have I ever told you how much I love you?"
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Every day, Blaine. At least twice."
Blaine took a sip of the coffee. "Well, I love you. So much."
Kurt turned red. "I love you, too."
Blaine turned and placed the coffee on one of the amps before he reached out and pulled Kurt into his arms. "Not that I'm not completely ecstatic that you're here, but what's with the surprise visit?"
Kurt pulled back and opened his mouth to answer. "I-"
"Oh, hello, Blaine. How are you doing?"
The two of them turned to see Amelia standing close to them, her hip cocked out to the side and one of her fingers playing with her hair. "Oh," Blaine said, standing up straight and trying not to frown when Kurt pulled back completely. "Hi, Amelia. I'm fine, how are you?"
She took a few steps towards him, her hips moving wildly and Blaine really wanted to know why Kurt had suddenly bitten his lip and looked like he was trying really hard not to laugh. "I'm just dandy."
Kurt's hand flew up to his mouth and his arm tightened around his waist. His shoulders were shaking, and Blaine wondered if he was getting sick. "Well, that's good."
She nodded and took two more steps towards him. "Have you had lunch yet?" she asked, bending down a bit and leaning forward. Her shirt was a low-cut one, so when she bent down she showed off a lot of her chest. Maybe I should let her know that people are going to stare at her for all of the wrong reasons if she keeps doing this?
"No, I haven't. Actually, I was planning on-"
"Me neither! We should go get lunch together!"
Blaine could only blink at her. Out of the side of his eye, he could see that Kurt's shoulders were shaking slightly. He was getting worried. "Kurt?" he asked, turning around so that he could fully see his boyfriend. "Are you okay?"
"Oh, no, I'm totally fine!" His voice was high and slightly breathless, which Blaine knew only happened when he was nervous or sad.
Or when he's trying too hard not to laugh and his eyes are watering, a part of his brain told him, but he promptly ignored it.
"Are you sure?"
Kurt nodded and Blaine smiled.
"Then do you want to go get lunch with me and Amelia?"
"I would like to, thank you."
Blaine's smile widened, but when he turned to look back at Amelia he realized that her smile had vanished and had been replaced with a very big frown. His smile slipped a little. Had he done something wrong? "Well, where would you like to go eat? Maybe the small Italian place around the corner? They have nice spaghetti."
"Sure," she said, sounding put out. "I'll lead the way."
When she turned around and began walking towards the restaurant, he found his arm being linked with Kurt's and grinned. "I'm glad that you showed up today. It was getting kind of boring."
Kurt grinned back at him, the rims of his eyes slightly red. "Well, it is National Kissing Day. I had to do my share," he said, leaning over and planting an open mouthed kiss on Blaine's lips.
Blaine loved kissing Kurt.
He loved it.
Kurt's lips were soft, but not like a girl's lips would be. They were very much Kurt lips, and he loved them. Every time Kurt kissed him he found himself unable to speak or think coherently, and he loved every second of it. Unfortunately, the kiss he'd just received had been short and Kurt pulled away, leaving Blaine with a small frown.
"Are you really hungry? I passed Thad on my way over and he told me that you'd forgotten to eat breakfast."
Blaine nodded. "I over slept and had to leave before I could eat something."
Blaine's stomach let out a rather loud growl and both of them glanced down at it. "Well, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that you're really hungry."
"You could say that," he replied.
"How come you over slept?"
Blaine let out a groan. "It was so hot last night! I kept tossing and turning, and at around three in the morning I finally got up and dragged all of the fans that we own into my room. The noise was awful, but at least I got some sleep." He tightened his grip on Kurt's arm. "How did you make it through the night?"
Kurt shrugged. "I gave up on clothes."
Blaine wasn't completely sure, but there was a huge possibility that his brain had just melted. "I'm sorry, you what?"
Kurt shrugged. "I ended up sleeping in just boxers because it was so hot."
Yup, Blaine's brain was most definitely melted. "In just... boxers?"
Kurt nodded. "Yes, it was incredibly hot, Blaine, but I wasn't going to go around naked. That's just awkward for everyone. I know. From past experience."
He let go of Blaine's arm and sped up, leaving his boyfriend to stare after him, his jaw open and his eyes wide. Keep the thoughts PG, Blaine. PG, PG! He shook his head quickly, then jogged back up so that he was once again walking side-by-side with his boyfriend.
Amelia led then right to the door, where she stood next to it and waited. Kurt gave her an odd look before he opened the door and slipped inside. It had closed by the time Blaine reached it, so he grabbed it and opened it, then prepared to take a step inside.
A cough from Amelia made him stop.
He turned his head to look at her, then almost froze at the creepy smile she was giving him. It nearly dominated the lower part of her face; her eyes were as wide as eyes could humanly get, and her gums were showing from the force of the smile. Blaine glanced back at the door, then stepped back and asked, "ladies first?"
Her smile widened (how the fuck is that possible? His mind shrieked at him), and she took the necessary steps to enter the restaurant. Blaine followed after her, shivering. He speed-walked up to where Kurt was standing with the host and pushed himself next to his boyfriend.
"Are you okay?" Kurt asked, leaning towards him as the host lead them to their table.
Blaine nodded quickly. "Yes, sorry. She's just... She had a creepy look on her face when she was looking at me."
To his surprise, Kurt let out a muffled chuckle and sped up again, leaving Blaine closer to Amelia then he wanted to be.
"Blaine?" Amelia's voice called out. "Thank you for holding the door open for me. That was really gentleman-like for you to do. No one's ever done that for me before."
He chanced a look at her and felt relief to see that she was smiling normally. He gave her his own smile in return. "It's okay," he said softly, in what Kurt had dubbed his Dapper Voice. "You're most certainly welcome."
The host sat them at a booth; Kurt got in first, sitting next to the wall. Blaine slid in next to him, leaving Amelia to sit by herself. They ordered their food and were halfway through eating when Blaine stood up to excuse himself to the bathroom. As soon as he was out of earshot, Amelia shot forward and gripped Kurt's hands.
"Tell me everything you know about him."
Kurt almost chocked on his drink. "I'm sorry, what?"
"Blaine," she said desperately. "He's so hot and I want to date him."
At least she's forward, Kurt thought with a grin. "Well, I can't say much, except for the fact that he's dating someone."
Her smile slipped. "No way," she said.
"Yeah," he said, nodding and taking a bite of his pasta. "For a while now. They're totally in love."
She shook her head. "I don't believe it. And I'm not giving up."
"Okay," Kurt said. It wasn't his place to stop it. Blaine would have to do that himself. Plus, it would be fun to watch everything go down.
Blaine returned five minutes later, and during those five minutes Kurt had watched the gears in Amelia's brain turn wildly. And sure enough, as soon as Blaine had sat down, Amelia's smile had returned. "Blaine," she said happily. "I was thinking about having dessert. Would you like to share one with me?"
Blaine blinked, then turned his head to Kurt as if asking for approval, like a puppy would look to its master to make sure it was okay to chase after the ball. Kurt shrugged, trying not to laugh. "Sure, if you want. You and I never seem to get desserts often, so... Enjoy the calories."
Blaine agreed to the dessert happily and the two ended up sharing a rather large ice-cream topped brownie, covered in hot fudge. Kurt side-eyed him the entire time he ate his half. Amelia, however, took two bites then covered her stomach. "Oh, I couldn't eat another bite. You go ahead and finish it, Blaine."
Blaine stared at her. "Are you sure? You didn't eat very much."
"Oh, I'm positive."
Blaine shrugged, then ate the dessert happily, while both Kurt and Amelia watching him with adoring smiled on their faces. When Blaine had finished his ice cream brownie, Kurt grabbed his arm and asked him to go up to the register with him. "Can you wait outside for us, Amelia?" Kurt asked happily. She nodded, then stood and left.
It was then that Kurt started laughing.
"What's so funny?"
"Oh, Blaine... Don't you see what she's trying to do?"
"Well, she's being overly friendly, but-"
"She has a crush on you!"
Blaine frowned, thinking, then-
"Oh god! Are you sure?"
Kurt snickered again. "Yes, I am very sure!"
"Well..." Blaine sat down, then placed his head in his hands. "What should I do? I mean, I'm obviously not good at turning people down but..."
Kurt leaned down and planted a soft kiss on to his lips. "Don't worry, I'll help you."
Blaine hummed, then planted a kiss to the hollow of Kurt's throat. "Did I ever tell you how sexy you look today?"
"No, I do think that you skipped that."
Blaine smirked up at him. "Well you look absolutely ravishable."
Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Ravishable? Is that even a word."
"Oh, I guess you're right. How about edible?"
"Being edible does sound more appealing then being ravishable."
Blaine let out a laugh then pulled him down for a more passionate kiss.
{~*~}
They had a plan set in motion: Kurt had left to sit somewhere where he wouldn't be seen by them, but he'd be talking to Blaine via blue-tooth earpiece and helping him figure out what to say to her. Blaine had to admit, Nick and Jeff would have been very proud about their 007 like plan. He'd told Kurt this, who had rolled his eyes and playfully hit him on the head. "Geek," he'd called him.
Amelia was standing outside of the restaurant, playing with her hair and twisting her foot around on the ground. Blaine took a deep breath.
"Amelia," he called out, reaching up to his ear to make sure that his earpiece was securely in place.
She glanced up and beamed at him. "Hi, Blaine! Finally alone, right?"
Blaine nodded and unconsciously touched the earpiece again. "Yeah," he said softly.
She walked closer to him and reached out, like she was going to take his hand. He took one step back, then watched as her smile fell. "Listen, Amelia..."
"I'm taken. Just be blunt, Blaine."
"I'm taken," he said, in the softest tone that he could muster. "I mean, you're pretty, you're sweet and nice and-"
"Going a bit too far, there, Blaine."
"-but I'm already dating someone else."
Amelia glanced down at her hands. "Oh, I see..."
"I'm sorry," he said, feeling bad for feeling relieved.
"I bet she must be really pretty."
Wait...
Blaine frowned. "No, it's not that. Like I said, you are pretty, but-"
"So, I'm not pretty, am I, Blaine? Well, then."
"Then why won't you give me a chance? I promise I'd be the best girlfriend ever and you'd never have to worry about me cheating or... or anything like that!"
Blaine gulped. Well, this wasn't turning out like he thought it would. "No, Amelia, it's not that, it's-"
"But then again, I bet you've been dating for a while, and she's your first love and-"
Well, she's got that part sort of right.
"Amelia-"
"And, she's probably got a great chest and legs and-"
"I'm gay, Blaine! Say it!"
"I'm gay."
She stopped talking. Hiccuping, she wiped a tear away from her eyes. "You're what?"
"I'm gay, and I'm currently in a relationship with the boy you saw me with earlier."
"I'm gay, and I'm currently in a relationship with the boy you saw me with earlier."
She blinked at him.
"You were right, we have been dating for a while."
"You were right, we have been dating for a while."
"I love him and he loves me, and we're planning on going to New York together next year after we graduate from school next year."
"I love him and he loves me, and we're planning on going to New York together next year after we graduate from school next year."
"I think he's beautiful."
"I think he's beautiful."
"He's amazing."
"He's amazing."
"We're planning on getting married."
"We're planning on getting married."
"And having two point five kids and living among the stars."
"And having two point five kids and living among the stars."
"You don't need to see my identification.."
"You don't need to see my identification."
"These aren't the droids you're looking for."
"These aren't the droids you're looking for."
He paused.
What?
Kurt was snickering in his ear and Blaine couldn't help but smile a bit. Amelia, however, looked like she was going to start sobbing, although she did look slightly confused. "I'm sorry," Blaine said, not sounding sorry at all. "Maybe you'll find someone else soon, though," he said, thinking about the three boys who loved to stare at her whenever they were able to see her. Maybe he could set her up with one of them-
"Blaine, don't you dare start thinking about finding a boyfriend for her."
Blaine pouted.
Amelia let out a halfhearted laugh. "Well, I guess you were just too good to be true," she said, reaching up to wipe a tear away with her hand. "Your boyfriend is lucky," she said with a sad smile before turning on her heel and walking away dramatically.
"I think Rachel Berry would be proud of her storming achievement," he said, knowing that Kurt would hear him.
"Well, that says something about her character. I don't know whether you meant it as a compliment or not."
Blaine sighed, then adjusted the earpiece again. "Where did you say you were sitting?"
"At the ice cream shop, why?"
"You said it was National Kissing day, right?"
"Yes?"
…
"Blaine?"
…
"You hung up on me, didn't you?"
…
"Blaine, if you don't answer me this second I'm going to - ohmygod! Blaine! What are you do-"
…
"Oh, okay then. I think I see what you're doing. ...I should hang up now, huh?"
"Yes, you should."
Click