The Light at the End 7/10?
Title: The Light at the End
Pairing: Kurt/Blaine
Rating: PG-13
Next chapter: "So you don't like Jeremiah?"
Previous chapter: Carole was a nice lady.
Summary: Kurt Hummel was just like every other teenager: loud, demanding, but still a good child. That is, he was like that until he was diagnosed with a medical condition that was, without a doubt, going to kill him. So, he accepted his condition and decided to wait out the rest of his short life. But a chance meeting with a boy named Blaine Anderson could possibly give him just enough strength to keep fighting.
Author's notes: I started this a while ago - and by a while ago I mean a couple of months, a few days, and roughly 2.7 hours ago. The medical condition is inspired by the movie Seven Pounds, and the will to keep going in this story is inspired by a fact that I learned: that even if everything seems gloomy, one person can make an immense difference.
I hope that you all enjoy.
Chapter Seven
Even though he and Blaine were talking once again, Kurt didn't feel like their relationship got back to how it had originally before their time of not communicating until later. Blaine told Kurt over coffee sometimes after Valentine's day that he thought that it took only a couple of weeks for them to be back to normal. Kurt said that he thought that it took until after Christmas.
"Really? Christmas?"
Kurt nodded. "Yeah," he said softly, turning the coffee cup around with his fingers. "I don't know... You were suddenly just there and you hadn't been before then, so it was just kind of weird, you know?"
It was true. When Kurt had been released from the hospital, Blaine suddenly became the third boy to live underneath the Hummel roof. He'd been there when Kurt had walked through the front doors after having been discharged; he had been there when Kurt had woken up at nine in the morning on the Saturday after leaving the hospital; he had brought Kurt coffee on Monday after Dalton had let everyone out; he'd turned down Jeremiah's offer to hang out on the next Wednesday.
Kurt's heart fluttered, remembering that phone call he'd overheard.
"Oh, hey, Jeremiah. Hmm? ...oh, yeah, I'd forgotten about that."
…
"No. I-"
…
"No, I'm at Kurt's. …"
…
"Yeah, yeah, I know. I was looking forward to that as well, but Kurt... I need to be here with him. He's- He's important to me, you know that."
…
"Sure. And I'm sorry. ...Huh? Don't apologize? ...Okay? Okay..."
…
"I know I can, I know, but I don't think that now is the right time."
…
"I-I'll think about it. Goodbye, Jeremiah."
It had been an awkward phone call from what he could hear from Blaine's side of the conversation. When he'd heard Blaine hang up and sigh, Kurt had hurried back into his room as quick as he could, and a few seconds later Blaine walked in with the glass of water he'd left to get.
"Do you want to finish the movie now?"
Blaine stuck around their house until after Christmas; he'd stopped by to give Kurt a Christmas gift, a quick hug, but left quickly, leaving Kurt to gasp and stare at the newly released Marc Jacobs jacket that was sitting, nicely folded, in the gift box that Blaine had given him.
After that gift, though, their relationship seemed to go back to how it had been before Kurt had spilled that he was dying. Blaine came over every once in a while, and their texting slowed down, but only by a bit. He did miss seeing Blaine over all of the time, because he wanted to see as much of Blaine as he could, and his family (even Carole and Finn; they'd moved in two weeks after Kurt had been released from the hospital. Sharing a room with Finn was horrible) liked Blaine, but he was glad that things were going back to normal.
[*]*[*]
"So, these rascals are Katie," Blaine said, pointing to the little girl with dark, curly hair. "And James," he said, pointing to the little boy running around the living room with an airplane clutched in his fist.
It was a rather warm March afternoon, and Kurt was currently standing in the Anderson living room, looking at Blaine's younger siblings and attempting to make them not cry. He wasn't the best with kids, even though his dad often joked that he'd make the best father. He really wanted Blaine's siblings to like him.
Kurt smiled at them, and then found Katie pulling on his pant leg. "Hello," he said to her.
She stared up at him with large hazel eyes. "You're taaaaaall, mister! Taller than B is!"
Kurt glanced over at Blaine. 'B?' he mouthed.
Blaine shrugged. 'Nickname,' he mouthed back.
Katie tugged on his pant leg again. "Kuuuuuuuuurt?"
"Yes, honey?"
She stuck out her bottom lip and her eyes began to water.
Uh oh... Don't cry don't cry don't cry.
"B won't get us any cake, and my tummy hurts, and only cake will make it feel better!"
Kurt laughed, then looked over at Blaine, who was shaking his head but smiling. "Would you mind if we all made a cake, Blaine?"
Blaine let out a small chuckle. "No, I don't mind." He clapped his hands together. "C'mon, guys! Let's go show Kurt how amazing we are when it comes to baking cakes!"
"Yay!"
Katie reached up and grabbed his hand. "C'mon, Kurtsie! C'mon! I'll show you th' kitchen!"
James appeared next to him and grabbed his other hand. "Yeah, yeah! We'll show you, we'll show you! We know where all of the rooms are in our house. That's cool, right? It is so cool, I think, since we have lots of rooms."
He felt Blaine approach him from the back and push on his back. "Yes, 'Kurtsie', let's show you the kitchen."
Kurt laughed and let himself be dragged into the kitchen, glad that Blaine had asked him to come over at the last minute.
[*]*[*]
"So, would you like to do me a huge favor today, Kurt?"
"And what would that be?"
"I'm stuck in my house, babysitting my little siblings."
"And you need me because...?"
"They want to meet you."
"They want to meet me...?"
"Yeah, and I kind of... I want them to meet you."
"Why would you want that?"
"Um, hello? Best friend, Kurt Hummel."
"Okay, but still..."
"I'll take us out to get tacos and burritos."
"You're bribing me with Mexican food?"
"I totally am, aren't I?"
"Yes, yes you are. And it's working. Fine, I'll be over there in three hours."
"Yay!"
"See you later, Blaine."
"See you soon, Kurt."
[*]*[*]
As it turned out, neither Katie or James could cook. Not like Kurt had expected them to be able to cook; they were five.
Blaine on the other hand...
He was helpless.
"Blaine, just... Did you put the eggs in before they were supposed to? And is that... is that soy sauce?"
Blaine pouted. "I'm not much of a cooker, Kurt. You know that."
Kurt looked back down at the cake batter. "Guess I'll just have to give you those lessons I promised you sometime, huh?"
"I think so."
Katie looked like she was going to cry. "But... I wanted cake."
James sighed, then wandered out of the room. "Girls are weird," he said to Kurt as he passed him. "I don't like them."
Katie stuck her tongue out at James. "Boys smell."
James' face turned slightly red. "We do not! Girlshave cooties."
"No we don't! You boys are just jealous because girls are prettier than you, so there," she finished, sticking her tongue out at him. "B," she said stiffly, turning to look at Blaine. "Take us to the park, please. I need to play outside, but far away from Mister James The Ugly Face, okay?"
James gasped. "You mean... You won't play with me, Katie?"
Katie shook her head. "No, I'm not going to play with you."
James ran towards her and hugged her. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it! Are we friends again?"
Katie was still, then she turned in James' arms and returned the hug. "Of course we're still friends! We're bestest friend, remember?"
"I do, I do."
Then, suddenly, they grasped hands and turned on Kurt and Blaine. "Can we go to the park," they said at the same time. "Please?"
Kurt turned his head to the side slightly to see Blaine smiling at him. "Park?"
Blaine nodded, then clapped his hands together a few times. "Okay, you two! Go and get your shoes on and then we'll go to the park!"
"Yay!" They cheered, and rushed out of the room.
[*]*[*]
It was nice and quiet at the park.
There weren't many people, so James and Katie had the playground mostly to themselves. They were giggling, shrieking and laughing, running around the playground, smiling the entire time. He and Blaine were sitting on a bench off to the side of the playground, watching the two kids. Blaine was laughing as James slipped and fell, then got back up and tackled Katie to the ground, both of them giggling.
"They really like playing outside, huh?"
Blaine nodded. "That they do."
Then he looked over at something over Kurt's head. A huge smile grew on his face and he stood up. "I'll be rightback, okay?"
Kurt frowned. "Blaine, what-"
But Blaine only smiled wider at him, then he dashed off, leaving Kurt staring after him. "Okay, then..."
Blaine didn't return five minutes later, nor did he return ten or twenty minutes later. Eventually, James and Katie walked up to him, James holding Katie's hand and Katie trying to hide a yawn. "We're tired, Kurtsie. Can we go home now?"
Kurt nodded, stood up and took James' hand. "Let's go find your brother, okay?"
They nodded, and began to head in the direction Blaine had left in.
Five minutes later Kurt spotted him standing next to a small food stand, talking to someone. By this point he was carrying Katie in his arms and taking slow, steady steps. He had only been carrying her for a minute, but he was already out of breath.
"Blai-" He cut himself off, however, when he got close enough to see who it was that Blaine was talking to.
Blonde, curly, poofy hair. Tall and wearing GAP , smiling and laughing for the first time Kurt had seen in a while.
Jeremiah.
Kurt felt himself stiffening, trying to not be affected by seeing Blaine that happy with Jeremiah. Stupid, fucking Jeremiah...
James had spotted the two by now, and he reached up and tugged on Katie's leg. "Look, Kates, it's Jerey!"
Katie opened her eyes and looked over, then she smiled, wiggling to be put down. Kurt placed her on the ground gently. "Jerey, Jerey," she called, running over to him, James following her. Kurt walked slowly after them, his head down.
Jeremiah was bent down and playing with James and Kate by the time Kurt reached them. Blaine saw him then, and he said, smiling, "Kurt, hey!"
The stiff and uncomfortable way he said it set Kurt on edge and he turned his head to the side, looking around at the park, and not at Blaine. He did look back when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Blaine was looking at him oddly, and Kurt really didn't know what to say.
"Are you okay?"
Kurt shook his head. "I'm tired. I think that I'm going to head on home, okay?"
Blaine's frown increased. "Kurt?"
Kurt took a step back. "It's getting pretty hard to breathe, so I'm going to go get my car and go home. I'll text you when I get home. Okay?"
Blaine took his hand away from Kurt's shoulder. "Okay... Can I at least walk you to your car?"
Kurt shook his head and began to walk away. "I'll just call you later. Say goodbye to Kate and James for me!"
Blaine waved at him, the frown still on his face. But when Kurt called him at eight that night Blaine sounded really happy.
Jeremiah probably made him happier. If he makes him happy then...
He shook his head and climbed into bed. Be happy, Kurt. You are going to see Sectionals tomorrow. You're going to cheer your friends on, and whoever wins, you'll be happy for them.
With that thought, he settled down and slipped into a deep sleep.
[*]*[*]
Lately, Blaine had been... Odd.
Kurt really didn't know why, but every time they talked or met up, he was twitchy, and he acted like he didn't know what to do around Kurt. He'd open his mouth, then shut it quickly, and repeat the process a few times before he gave up and sat there in silence, leaving it to Kurt to come up with something to talk about.
And so, when Blaine had asked him to come over at four rather randomly, he'd called up Mercedes to see if she wouldn't mind driving him over to Blaine's house (his father didn't really want him driving anymore, so he was reliant on his friends - it was odd that even Puck had said he would take Kurt anywhere if he needed it, but Kurt was grateful). She'd said yes, and they'd arrived at Blaine's house a few minutes early.
"Hey, can you come over at around four today? I have something I need to tell you."
He was prepared for whatever Blaine wanted to talk to him about; he was prepared if it was good news, bad news, or if Blaine was going to be telling him that he was part leprechaun or something. What he was not prepared for was who answered the door.
"Oh..."
It was Jeremiah.
Kurt took a small step back. "Um..."
"Were you looking for Blaine?"
Kurt nodded, looking down at the ground. Well, this answered his question. "Yes, I was but, um... I can just call him later or something."
Jeremiah opened his mouth, but before he could respond Blaine's little sister wandered up and pulled on Jeremiah's pant leg. "Jerey? Are you gonna get us our ice cream?"
"Yes, honey, just one second."
She nodded, then saw Kurt. "Oh, hi, Kurtsie! How are you doin'?"
He sighed. "I'm okay."
She smiled. "That's good. Blaine likes it when you're doin' okay." Then she turned around and bounced back into the house. Jeremiah watched her go with a smile on his face.
"Sorry about that. So, did you say you were looking for Blaine? Because he's-"
Kurt shook his head. "I was, but... Just forget about it. I'll call him later or whatever."
Jeremiah frowned. "I'm sorry, but what was your name again?"
"Listen, I'm sorry to bother you and Blaine. I'll just be going now..."
An odd look was forming on Jeremiah's face; Kurt didn't really understand why Blaine liked him, but he apparently did, and Kurt... Well, Kurt would move on; he never really thought that he'd ever get someone as amazing as Blaine to actually like him like that. But Blaine deserved someone good, someone who wasn't going to die, and from what Blaine had told him, Jeremiah was a good guy.
"Will you take care of him?"
Jeremiah, who had opened his mouth again, blinked. "What?"
Kurt sighed and tried to smile. "He's clumsy, he wears way too much hair gel, and rather clueless when it comes to certain things, and he's got a bad habit of jumping on things to make himself seem taller than he really is, but-"
He took a deep breath.
"But, he likes you, so just... He means a lot to me, and I like to see him happy and smiling; he does that a lot with you. So, will you, please?"
Jeremiah looked very confused, but he nodded slowly. Kurt let out a sigh of relief, then waved and began to head down the walkway.
"Wait!"
Kurt stopped halfway down the walkway. "Yeah?"
"What was your name again? So I can tell Blaine who dropped by."
He turned slightly. "It's Kurt." And then he began to walk again.
He must have been imagining it when Jeremiah let out a very loud, "shit," and he must have been imagining it when he heard Jeremiah call out his name and for him to "stop" and to "hold on a second".
He must have imagined it when he heard Jeremiah call, not to him, but probably into the house for Blaine to "get your ass outside now".
And he was most definitely imagining it when he heard a voice (and it was most definitely Blaine's) yell out to him as his car was pulling away.
Mercedes glanced over at him from the side of her eye, not wanting to take her gaze off of the road. "I'm sorry, boo."
He sighed, then turned and curled up on the leather seat, trying to think about Sectionals tomorrow, and not about Blaine and Jeremiah.
He was done.
[*]*[*]
Sectionals was a crowded place, Kurt noted as he and Carole attempted to find their seats.
"Sweetie, are we supposed to be sitting where the hippies are sitting, or where the English couple are?"
Kurt glanced back down at their tickets. "I think where the hippies are... I think."
Eventually, they found their seats (next to where the hippies were sitting) in time for the first performance. Some group called the Hipsters or...something. Kurt wanted to stay and support both Blaine and the Warblers and New Directions, but by the time he was sitting down he was panting hard. Carole glanced over at him, a worried look on her face.
"Sweetie, are you okay?"
He glanced over at her and nodded sharply. "I'll be fine," he said, turning his attention back on stage just in time to see the Warblers begin their performance.
As always, Blaine was amazing, and Kurt was unable to tear his eyes away as they sang Hey Soul Sister. He was surprised, however, when Blaine suddenly spotted him and for the rest of the performance he didn't look away. By the end of the song, Kurt knew that he was blushing. But, Blaine couldn't be looking at him, could he?
New Directions was next, but at that point, Kurt couldn't find the strength in him to care. He hadn't really talked to Blaine since he'd left his house after seeing Jeremiah there. What was there to say? Not much, he'd told himself.
He was trying, trying to forget and get over Blaine because now that he'd thought of it, he hadn't stood a chance. At all. Blaine was wonderful, gorgeous, sexy, popular, and he was going to probably live a very long life.
Kurt... Well, he wasn't any of those.
He took in a deep breath to steady himself, and when he did, a rush of dizziness went through him. He reached out with his left hand and grabbed Carole's arm.
"Kurt? What is it?"
He shook his head. "...dizzy..." he muttered.
Her eyes widened. "How dizzy?"
He tipped his head back, hoping for the dizziness to go away.
It didn't.
"I think I... I think I need to go home," he said as softy as he could, but loud enough that Carole could hear him.
She nodded, and the two stood up and, as fast as Kurt was able to, left the auditorium. God, he just wanted to go home and sleep for the rest of his life. He stumbled slightly as they exited the building, and Carole's grip on him tightened. He covered his eyes from the sun with his hand and leaned closer to her as they made their way out to the car.
"I want you to sleep, okay, Kurt? And I'll wake you up when we get home, but then I want you to go back asleep as soon as we get there, okay?"
He was too tired to argue with her, so he nodded. He was unable to sleep the entire way, though, dozing in and out through the entire ride. He caught some parts of the conversation that Carole was having with his dad, the "doctor said that he'd have bad days," and the, "don't worry. I'll call you if anything else happens," and the, "no, he just said that he was dizzy and felt like he needed to go home,"s standing out.
When he finally fell asleep, it felt like he'd only slept for a minute when Carole woke him up. He walked into his house and immediately headed for his room and collapsed on to his bed, falling quickly back to sleep.
He woke up hours later, feeling much better but restless, like he needed to get out. His dad was in the kitchen with Carole, and he stopped their conversation to look over at his son. "You feeling better?"
Kurt nodded, "Yes," then went and grabbed his coat and to slip on his shoes.
Seconds later, Burt was by his side. "And where do you think you're going?"
Kurt sighed. "I just... I feel like I need to get out for a little while. I promise that I won't go far. Just to the pond or to see Mom."
His dad looked hesitant, but Kurt couldn't blame him.
"Please, Dad... Please."
Burt sighed. "Fine, but just keep me updated, okay?"
Kurt smiled, then hugged him. "I will." And he left.
It wasn't that dark out when he finally made it to the pond, having decided at last minute to not visit his mom. He walked over to the same bench and sat down on it, staring around at the scenery and listening to the wind. The pond area was empty, no one else bothering to be out on a cold day, but Kurt preferred it that way. He wanted to be alone, but only for a while. And so he sat, trying to enjoy the peace and quiet, probably for the last time.
"Hey..."
Blaine's voice was gentle and soft, and as Kurt looked up from his spot on the bench he could see the soft smile on Blaine's face.
"Hi," he said back, before turning his gaze back to the pond.
The ducks weren't there anymore, having left for the winter, but if he closed his eyes, he could hear the quacking and the splashing and the wings flapping. What he would give to go back to those days. Back to those days where he was healthier, where his heart was still working to the best that it could, and to where he wasn't pale, he didn't have such dark circles underneath his eyes, and where he wasn't helplessly in love with Blaine when it couldn't - wouldn't - work out.
He only let his eyes open when he felt Blaine sit down next to him. "Your dad told me you might be here. Well, actually, he said that you'd either be here or at your mom's grave. For some odd reason, I had a feeling you'd be here instead."
Kurt sighed and watched as his breath floated off in front of him. "It's calmer here to me for some reason. I don't know why."
"Your dad says you've been coming here a lot?"
Kurt smiled slightly. "I have some happy memories of this place. I feel as though the first time I was here, I was actually happy for a while." He drew off. "So... How did Sectionals go?"
He could tell that Blaine shrugged when the fabric of his coat shifted. "We tied with New Directions."
"Congratulations."
"Thank you... Were you not feeling well? Is that why you left? I know that you were there, but when we were called back up on stage for the announcement, you weren't there any more."
"I... I got really dizzy, so I asked to go home. I've... I've been getting more and more dizzy spells lately."
Blaine placed a friendly hand on his thigh. "And...?"
Kurt bit his lip. "My doctor says it's because I'm getting weaker, and so the more I do, the more often I could pass out or have dizzy spells..."
It was only when he felt Blaine's hand on his face that he realized he was crying. He turned and allowed Blaine to pull him into a tight hug. "I'm scared. I'm so scared!"
Blaine's grip around him tightened immensely, and he whispered, "It's okay. Just let it out."
And Kurt did.
He cried, sobbed, and he screamed because it was all so fucking unfair and why did it have to be him? He'd lost his mom when he'd been a kid, he had been born gay, been bullied, almost lost his dad to depression after the passing of his mother, and then he'd found out that his heart was dying. If he'd believed in a god, he would have been demanding answers, because it wasn't fair!
Throughout the entire time he cried, Blaine held him tightly, whispering to him, "It's okay to cry, baby. It's okay. We can make it through this, we can," and, "Everything will be okay, it will be. Be strong. I love you."
If he wasn't already so emotional, Kurt would have pulled away and just stared at him because Blaine had just said that he loved him, but he didn't. Instead, he pulled back and leaned up and pressed a kiss to Blaine's lips.
It was desperate and needy and when Blaine responded back just as strong, Kurt could tell that Blaine was just as scared as he was. He ended the kiss almost as quickly as he had started it, whispered, "I love you too," and then leaned back in; they kissed each other until Kurt didn't have the air power to kiss anymore, so he let Blaine plant kisses anywhere and everywhere he could. His cheeks, his forehead, his eyes, his neck, all the while whispering I Love You's into Kurt's skin and that he would be there with him until the end.
And Kurt continued to cry, because now he had everything that he wanted, and he didn't even know how long he would be able to cherish it. And even though he was tired and having a hard time breathing, he let the words flow out, because now he could say them and know that they'd be returned. He still had questions for Blaine that needed to be answered, but for now, he didn't think about them.
"I love you."
Author's notes: Well, it happened! SEE? SMOOCHES. THEY KISSED. AND SAID THAT THEY LOVED EACH OTHER. I FEEL HAPPY.
I'M FEELING GLAD.
I'VE GOT SUNSHINE, IN A BAG.
...So, I lied. I couldn't wait. I just wanted to get this out. But I bet that you don't care that I lied. I thought that the little part that I added at the top would take longer to work out. I needed it in there to let you know what month the story is now in. I couldn't just say,
Twas the time for Christmas, but Kurt wouldn't spend a dime,
and, lately, Blaine had been over all of the time.
He brought over movies, and sometimes brought tea,
which made Kurt happy and he hugged him with glee.
Blaine gave him a jacket, that cost quite a lot,
which made Kurt gasp and be rooted to the spot.
Then Christmas was over and out came the sun,
and Blaine brought Kurt out to the park for some fun.
Time skip, time skip, dipitty doo.
And I really should stop; I have more writing to do.
...uh, yeah. That's what would have happened if I didn't actually write it down, story like.
Well... I hope that you enjoyed!