The beast in me is the best in me...
I love it. I love all of it. I love every single piece of it.
So here is my final mindset about my cross country existance. [I'm sure you're all relieved...maybe I'll finally stop moaning about it...]
I am going to simply be, but be ecstatic, about wherever I am from now on. End of story.
As you may have gathered, things are going well. I started this year off immediatly comfortable, happy, [have to say, I am thrilled about not being a freshman], throwing myself headfirst into all manner of interesting situations, classes, madness, well...it's all to be expected. I have Los Angeles heat in my hair and sun on my face and smog in my lungs and I have been both extremely productive and incredibly irresponsible, a perfect blend of the two. There is no place on earth more right for me at this point in my life, and I am feeling better in my own head and my own skin than I have felt...maybe ever.
Whatever it is that I find here, whatever it is that I remember about myself given enough independence, I like it. And I'm hoping that things continue in this vein, even when the work outweighs the play.
One last comment, just for the sake of documentation.
I dreamed about Reilly the other night, a wonderful dream that pretty much articulated my feelings for him better than I could have done using words. I miss one of the best friends I've ever had, that's all. Just miss him in my days. It isn't tragic anymore. It isn't heart wrenching. I just miss his voice on the phone, and his f***** up sense of humor, and all of his faults, and [sometimes] his physical presence. I miss my friend.
[...ta da!]
contentedly single, contentedly busy, contentedly here, where i am, simply being, and being ecstatic.
[...put that in your pipe and smoke it.]
So here is my final mindset about my cross country existance. [I'm sure you're all relieved...maybe I'll finally stop moaning about it...]
I am going to simply be, but be ecstatic, about wherever I am from now on. End of story.
As you may have gathered, things are going well. I started this year off immediatly comfortable, happy, [have to say, I am thrilled about not being a freshman], throwing myself headfirst into all manner of interesting situations, classes, madness, well...it's all to be expected. I have Los Angeles heat in my hair and sun on my face and smog in my lungs and I have been both extremely productive and incredibly irresponsible, a perfect blend of the two. There is no place on earth more right for me at this point in my life, and I am feeling better in my own head and my own skin than I have felt...maybe ever.
Whatever it is that I find here, whatever it is that I remember about myself given enough independence, I like it. And I'm hoping that things continue in this vein, even when the work outweighs the play.
One last comment, just for the sake of documentation.
I dreamed about Reilly the other night, a wonderful dream that pretty much articulated my feelings for him better than I could have done using words. I miss one of the best friends I've ever had, that's all. Just miss him in my days. It isn't tragic anymore. It isn't heart wrenching. I just miss his voice on the phone, and his f***** up sense of humor, and all of his faults, and [sometimes] his physical presence. I miss my friend.
[...ta da!]
contentedly single, contentedly busy, contentedly here, where i am, simply being, and being ecstatic.
[...put that in your pipe and smoke it.]