The Doctor Says...
Imagine my worry, confusion, and fury.
I have no idea what to do with my life. By this time next year, I'll need to have the majority of it planned out. It all starts with going to the right school. The right school will indicate what letters will come after my name, how much money I will make, where I will work, what people I can see, etc. Choosing the right school and my future determines how much work I will be doing, how much work I will want to be doing, and how long I will be doing it for.
So I ask around. I say, "What will be beneficial for me in the future?"
The nurses say I should be a nurse.
The licenced counselors say I should be a licenced counselor.
The social workers say I should be a social worker.
The doctors say I should be a doctor.
Now, nursing is a pain in the ass. I could barely pass basic A&P, nevermind nursing school. Don't ask me about words including orthostatic, syncope, occipital, diastolic, metatarsal, etc. I don't know them. (That's an oxymoron. I do. But they're pretty much all I know.) So there goes nursing. An LMHC will get me nowhere. I'll probably enjoy it a lot, and it probably won't take much time to get, but in the long run, I'll still be where I am today doing the same old crap. Next, there is the MSW, the LCSW, or the LICSW. These are all great ideas. Two years of school, interning and being trained by people. We'll get to why it's a problem. And then, above all else (aside from an MD, which can fuck itself) is the Ph.D. That's bigtime. Lots of schooling. Lots of research. Lots of funding. Lots of money and prestige in the long run.
So I decided to talk to the one person who would give it to me straight. I knew he wouldn't bullshit me, because he takes his job more seriously than anyone I have ever met in my life. He asks if I'm looking into grad schools, and I say I'm aiming for either Simmons or BC.
His eyes pop out of his head, he leans forward, and goes, "For social work?!"
So we get into a discussion about how I'm not sure what to do after college, as in which degree to go for. He asks me what I want to do, and suddenly, I have no fucking idea. And, in having this discussion with a haughty, high-class doctor, the phrase "help people" is meaningless. Do I want to do private practice? Do I want to be a clinician? Do I want to do private practice part-time and work in a hospital? Do I just want to work in a hospital? Do I want to teach? Do I want to do research? He asks me all of this. I'm pretty sure the look I gave him was much like he was speaking a different language.
I said private practice would be nice, but I could care less about research.
And then I remembered, he's a researcher.
So I say, "Would it be beneficial for me to go for an LICSW now, and then in a few years go back for a Ph.D.?"
He looks at me like I'm stupid. And, after thinking for a minute about how to not sound like an asshole, he basically says that there's no point in getting any kind of a social work degree. As this has been my objective for about a year, I ask why. And he creates for me this list:
~A Master's degree (MSW, LCSW, LICSW) looks good. But a Doctorate looks way fucking better. Everyone knows this.
~People go to the doctor. They do not go to the social worker.
~Doctors have a much more open field. With an MA, there's only so much to do, and you're competing with doctors for those positions. Who would YOU hire?
~"Social workers do psychology, but they are not psychologists." As in, just because I do it, that doesn't mean it's what I do. I'm studying PSYCHOLOGY. Not society. Not diads or triads or groups, but individuals and their minds. I would have a degree for one thing while acting on another. (And I know, I can get an MSW while specializing in mental health, but that makes WAY less sense than getting a Ph.D. in psychology. Dur.)
~Social workers and psychologists can pretty much do the same things, because they have pretty much the same experience and training. But here is why a doctorate looks better, and why an MA only takes two years to get: getting an MA basically is proving that you have not completed your education. "MA" can almost literally be translated to mean "You Failed Halfway." And that's never good.
Now, to be completely honest, this guy cares about nothing more than working hard so that in the long run you're filthy rich and everyone knows your name. Which would be awesome, but it's not priority. And then, he played the cruel game of, "But, you know, if you don't want to do the work..."
And in debating that last line, he explained the truth. MDs make a salary that is 60% higher than that of a Ph.D. (which CLEARLY really pisses him off). With an MSW, I'll be competing not only with the stupid hierarchy of status, but also with potential clients. So I tried to level with him: But I don't WANT to teach. I don't WANT to do research. I don't CARE about making less money.
But status and the word "Doctor" before my last name might be fun.
In which case, he presented me with a medium option: the Psy.D. (Lights beam down, 'Ohm's sound...) Here, I will work hard to become a doctor. But I won't need to do much research, and I won't be able to teach. I also probably won't be able to prescribe meds, but I never believed in the Biological approach anyways. Recap: no research, no teaching, status, money, the word 'doctor,' longer time in school.
I feel like I sound like I'm turning into an arrogant asshole who wants nothing more than fame and fortune. But I don't. I'd like to "help people." And, you know, be a doctor and stuff.
I think this may be the day I change my life. Wish me luck!
~V
I have no idea what to do with my life. By this time next year, I'll need to have the majority of it planned out. It all starts with going to the right school. The right school will indicate what letters will come after my name, how much money I will make, where I will work, what people I can see, etc. Choosing the right school and my future determines how much work I will be doing, how much work I will want to be doing, and how long I will be doing it for.
So I ask around. I say, "What will be beneficial for me in the future?"
The nurses say I should be a nurse.
The licenced counselors say I should be a licenced counselor.
The social workers say I should be a social worker.
The doctors say I should be a doctor.
Now, nursing is a pain in the ass. I could barely pass basic A&P, nevermind nursing school. Don't ask me about words including orthostatic, syncope, occipital, diastolic, metatarsal, etc. I don't know them. (That's an oxymoron. I do. But they're pretty much all I know.) So there goes nursing. An LMHC will get me nowhere. I'll probably enjoy it a lot, and it probably won't take much time to get, but in the long run, I'll still be where I am today doing the same old crap. Next, there is the MSW, the LCSW, or the LICSW. These are all great ideas. Two years of school, interning and being trained by people. We'll get to why it's a problem. And then, above all else (aside from an MD, which can fuck itself) is the Ph.D. That's bigtime. Lots of schooling. Lots of research. Lots of funding. Lots of money and prestige in the long run.
So I decided to talk to the one person who would give it to me straight. I knew he wouldn't bullshit me, because he takes his job more seriously than anyone I have ever met in my life. He asks if I'm looking into grad schools, and I say I'm aiming for either Simmons or BC.
His eyes pop out of his head, he leans forward, and goes, "For social work?!"
So we get into a discussion about how I'm not sure what to do after college, as in which degree to go for. He asks me what I want to do, and suddenly, I have no fucking idea. And, in having this discussion with a haughty, high-class doctor, the phrase "help people" is meaningless. Do I want to do private practice? Do I want to be a clinician? Do I want to do private practice part-time and work in a hospital? Do I just want to work in a hospital? Do I want to teach? Do I want to do research? He asks me all of this. I'm pretty sure the look I gave him was much like he was speaking a different language.
I said private practice would be nice, but I could care less about research.
And then I remembered, he's a researcher.
So I say, "Would it be beneficial for me to go for an LICSW now, and then in a few years go back for a Ph.D.?"
He looks at me like I'm stupid. And, after thinking for a minute about how to not sound like an asshole, he basically says that there's no point in getting any kind of a social work degree. As this has been my objective for about a year, I ask why. And he creates for me this list:
~A Master's degree (MSW, LCSW, LICSW) looks good. But a Doctorate looks way fucking better. Everyone knows this.
~People go to the doctor. They do not go to the social worker.
~Doctors have a much more open field. With an MA, there's only so much to do, and you're competing with doctors for those positions. Who would YOU hire?
~"Social workers do psychology, but they are not psychologists." As in, just because I do it, that doesn't mean it's what I do. I'm studying PSYCHOLOGY. Not society. Not diads or triads or groups, but individuals and their minds. I would have a degree for one thing while acting on another. (And I know, I can get an MSW while specializing in mental health, but that makes WAY less sense than getting a Ph.D. in psychology. Dur.)
~Social workers and psychologists can pretty much do the same things, because they have pretty much the same experience and training. But here is why a doctorate looks better, and why an MA only takes two years to get: getting an MA basically is proving that you have not completed your education. "MA" can almost literally be translated to mean "You Failed Halfway." And that's never good.
Now, to be completely honest, this guy cares about nothing more than working hard so that in the long run you're filthy rich and everyone knows your name. Which would be awesome, but it's not priority. And then, he played the cruel game of, "But, you know, if you don't want to do the work..."
And in debating that last line, he explained the truth. MDs make a salary that is 60% higher than that of a Ph.D. (which CLEARLY really pisses him off). With an MSW, I'll be competing not only with the stupid hierarchy of status, but also with potential clients. So I tried to level with him: But I don't WANT to teach. I don't WANT to do research. I don't CARE about making less money.
But status and the word "Doctor" before my last name might be fun.
In which case, he presented me with a medium option: the Psy.D. (Lights beam down, 'Ohm's sound...) Here, I will work hard to become a doctor. But I won't need to do much research, and I won't be able to teach. I also probably won't be able to prescribe meds, but I never believed in the Biological approach anyways. Recap: no research, no teaching, status, money, the word 'doctor,' longer time in school.
I feel like I sound like I'm turning into an arrogant asshole who wants nothing more than fame and fortune. But I don't. I'd like to "help people." And, you know, be a doctor and stuff.
I think this may be the day I change my life. Wish me luck!
~V