Dreams
Today I wrote "I'd rather sing than fall in love" or something on my profile. Right after I fell asleep, which is strange if you know me. I'm never able to sleep during the day. I had a dream where an old friend came to visit me and she brought her 19 year old sister along. Her sister was slow. They would repeatedly say that, that she's not mentally retarded, just slow. She was beautiful though. Quiet but playful. She didn't at all seem different to me, even as everyone treated her thusly. I fell in love with her and spent all the time I could with her, walking outside and laying on the grass. I think she loved me too, I can only remember her smiling at me and reaching out to hold my hand. Everything else is rapidly leaving my memory already.
Then, in the dream, I wake up. It's my birthday and I find next to where I sleep, a long letter accompanied by CD's of famous musicians wishing me a happy birthday. I walk out of my room and my whole family is there, telling me how proud they are of me. Apparently I made it as a singer. I had respect from the great musicians of our time and respect from my family and they were all happy and together for once, but I only cared about the dream I had just awoke from. I was immensely sad, the kind where you aren't depressed or lonely, you just feel as though it's always raining and you weigh much more than you do. I waited until everyone was asleep and walked outside. It was the same house as in my dream, a house I've never been. But I recognized it from the dream and I recognized the yard where her and I would always be. It was snowing this time, however. I layed on the ground and stared at the fountains and gates that we would circle.
Then I woke up for real. And I couldn't move. Now I feel that same sadness I did in the dream. But it's not all bad. It sounds kind of silly but I feel more confident that I'll be able to feel love for someone if the oppourtunity ever presents itself. Even though it was only a dream
Then, in the dream, I wake up. It's my birthday and I find next to where I sleep, a long letter accompanied by CD's of famous musicians wishing me a happy birthday. I walk out of my room and my whole family is there, telling me how proud they are of me. Apparently I made it as a singer. I had respect from the great musicians of our time and respect from my family and they were all happy and together for once, but I only cared about the dream I had just awoke from. I was immensely sad, the kind where you aren't depressed or lonely, you just feel as though it's always raining and you weigh much more than you do. I waited until everyone was asleep and walked outside. It was the same house as in my dream, a house I've never been. But I recognized it from the dream and I recognized the yard where her and I would always be. It was snowing this time, however. I layed on the ground and stared at the fountains and gates that we would circle.
Then I woke up for real. And I couldn't move. Now I feel that same sadness I did in the dream. But it's not all bad. It sounds kind of silly but I feel more confident that I'll be able to feel love for someone if the oppourtunity ever presents itself. Even though it was only a dream