exactly how i feel right now...
This may never start.
I'll tear us apart.
Cannot be your enemy.
Losing half a year.
Waiting for you here
I'd be your anything.
--Sugarcult [memory]
this was the best way to explain how im feeling... im sorry if this upset you. I'm sure its just a temporary feeling, because i miss you.
more depressing stuff:
today started terrible.. i had to get up at 5 30 am so i could come to school and take a chemistry test that i knew i was going to fail. I talked to my guidance counselor, and she told me the steps i need to take to have the class audited.. i hate to do that, but im in over my head. The work and my grade in that class are depressing me, and its becoming evident in all of my classes, not just chemistry. All i do is think about how bad im doing in that class, how im not going to get my grade up, and how im going to have an F on my transcript. It is so not like me to have a bad grade in a class, especially not a science class. I have never had lower then a C in a class, until this year. I over loaded myself this year. Why? because i was to proud to admit that it would be too much for me. because i thought i was too intellegent to take slacker classes my senior year. because im so good at science that i would have no problem taking 2 ap science classes. what i found was that i was wrong. I, like every other senior, have shut down mentally. I have 3 mos. left at this school, and i simply dont care anymore, however the fact that i dont care is depressing me. due to all of this, ive decided to take a year off of hard science classes, so next year im not majoring in science, not bio, not chem, and def. not bio chem. Ive decided that i dont want to be dentist, as much as i like the work, ive learned this year that i will not be able to handle a job that is that stressful.
well im going to go...
ugh.. i have chemistry next hour.. no good
-niki
I'll tear us apart.
Cannot be your enemy.
Losing half a year.
Waiting for you here
I'd be your anything.
--Sugarcult [memory]
this was the best way to explain how im feeling... im sorry if this upset you. I'm sure its just a temporary feeling, because i miss you.
more depressing stuff:
today started terrible.. i had to get up at 5 30 am so i could come to school and take a chemistry test that i knew i was going to fail. I talked to my guidance counselor, and she told me the steps i need to take to have the class audited.. i hate to do that, but im in over my head. The work and my grade in that class are depressing me, and its becoming evident in all of my classes, not just chemistry. All i do is think about how bad im doing in that class, how im not going to get my grade up, and how im going to have an F on my transcript. It is so not like me to have a bad grade in a class, especially not a science class. I have never had lower then a C in a class, until this year. I over loaded myself this year. Why? because i was to proud to admit that it would be too much for me. because i thought i was too intellegent to take slacker classes my senior year. because im so good at science that i would have no problem taking 2 ap science classes. what i found was that i was wrong. I, like every other senior, have shut down mentally. I have 3 mos. left at this school, and i simply dont care anymore, however the fact that i dont care is depressing me. due to all of this, ive decided to take a year off of hard science classes, so next year im not majoring in science, not bio, not chem, and def. not bio chem. Ive decided that i dont want to be dentist, as much as i like the work, ive learned this year that i will not be able to handle a job that is that stressful.
well im going to go...
ugh.. i have chemistry next hour.. no good
-niki