hc_bingo extra: straight line 1
Title: Change the Stars
Fandom: FF13
Pairing: none even if we all know Fang and Vanille aren't just 'friends'
Prompt: Forced to Participate in Illegal/Hurtful Activity, Difficult Pregnancy, Loss of Possessions, Falling, Homesickness
Rating: PG
Word Count: 623
Summary: Vanille’s life isn’t so black and white as it used to be. That takes some getting used to. Even more than choosing to change her fate.
NOTE (in bold, so people read it): maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassive spoilers. No, really, spoilers for the characters, the plot, everything. Spoilers. Don’t do it if you haven’t finished the game.
AN: Written, as the subject and tag say, for hc_bingo. Masterpost with game card is here.
When I was little, I thought everything was black and white. There was always a right choice and a wrong choice. Fair and unfair. Good and evil. Growing up in our tiny village, living our lives under the distant rule of the fal’Cie, it was easy to believe that. Easy to see the world in opposites. Harshness and kindness. Hate and love. Keeping something or losing it.
And then I was given a Focus.
I’d known people who were chosen to become l’Cie before. We all had. It wasn’t uncommon. The fal’Cie could only do so much for Gran Pulse, and the rest had to be left up to human hands. Even unwilling ones. But the Focus was always for the good of everyone, so it was the right thing to do. It was almost an honor to be chosen. As long as you did the right things and made the right choices, you’d achieve your Focus and be granted your reward. At least, that’s what I thought then. How easy it is to fall from that sort of faith.
Fang was chosen with me, and others. We were chosen to leave our homes and everything we loved and become something beyond ourselves. Our Focus was so large we’d never heard of it being given before. Destroy Cocoon. Become Ragnarok, the Day of Wrath. End the war and the world with it.
Except I couldn’t do it. I was afraid. Following our Focus should have been easy. It was the right thing to do. But I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to kill all those people. I’d rather have become a Cie’th. How could something that was supposed to be right feel so wrong?
So Fang became Ragnarok without me. Or tried.
I don’t remember everything that happened next. That much is true, at least, so I haven’t lied about everything. Lies. Those are supposed to be wrong, aren’t they? But if Fang doesn’t remember what she did, what we were supposed to do, then wouldn’t it be worse to remind her now?
But I’m getting ahead of myself. The next thing I knew, I woke up. I knew we hadn’t completed our Focus, or at least I hadn’t, but there we were. In this strange new place that was nothing at all like the home we’d left. Fang didn’t remember anything. She didn’t remember our Focus or how we’d got where we were. But I did. I remembered, and I never said a word, and I let that little boy be given something he never should have had to do, because I chose wrong.
But was it wrong? Can we ever judge what’s right and wrong for ourselves?
I thought it was right to go back to Gran Pulse. I just wanted to go home. I thought it was right to avoid my Focus, but isn’t the Focus what’s supposed to be right?
I’ve chosen the wrong things too many times and now all these people are suffering for it. But I’m still scared. I can feel my Focus growing more urgent, always present in the back of my mind, waiting. Ragnarok. Wouldn’t it be right to give in and give birth to the creature that can end all of this suffering? Even if it meant ending the good things, too?
But I can’t. I can’t do it. I can’t become Ragnarok. I can’t believe in black and white anymore. I tried to run away, tried to run back to a home I was never supposed to see again, and I can’t do that, either.
I’ll stay, and I’ll fight, and I’ll find Fang again. We’ll save the world. Both of them.
That’s the right thing to do. Isn’t it?
This entry was originally posted at http://envious-muses.dreamwidth.org/13607.html.
Fandom: FF13
Pairing: none even if we all know Fang and Vanille aren't just 'friends'
Prompt: Forced to Participate in Illegal/Hurtful Activity, Difficult Pregnancy, Loss of Possessions, Falling, Homesickness
Rating: PG
Word Count: 623
Summary: Vanille’s life isn’t so black and white as it used to be. That takes some getting used to. Even more than choosing to change her fate.
NOTE (in bold, so people read it): maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassive spoilers. No, really, spoilers for the characters, the plot, everything. Spoilers. Don’t do it if you haven’t finished the game.
AN: Written, as the subject and tag say, for hc_bingo. Masterpost with game card is here.
When I was little, I thought everything was black and white. There was always a right choice and a wrong choice. Fair and unfair. Good and evil. Growing up in our tiny village, living our lives under the distant rule of the fal’Cie, it was easy to believe that. Easy to see the world in opposites. Harshness and kindness. Hate and love. Keeping something or losing it.
And then I was given a Focus.
I’d known people who were chosen to become l’Cie before. We all had. It wasn’t uncommon. The fal’Cie could only do so much for Gran Pulse, and the rest had to be left up to human hands. Even unwilling ones. But the Focus was always for the good of everyone, so it was the right thing to do. It was almost an honor to be chosen. As long as you did the right things and made the right choices, you’d achieve your Focus and be granted your reward. At least, that’s what I thought then. How easy it is to fall from that sort of faith.
Fang was chosen with me, and others. We were chosen to leave our homes and everything we loved and become something beyond ourselves. Our Focus was so large we’d never heard of it being given before. Destroy Cocoon. Become Ragnarok, the Day of Wrath. End the war and the world with it.
Except I couldn’t do it. I was afraid. Following our Focus should have been easy. It was the right thing to do. But I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to kill all those people. I’d rather have become a Cie’th. How could something that was supposed to be right feel so wrong?
So Fang became Ragnarok without me. Or tried.
I don’t remember everything that happened next. That much is true, at least, so I haven’t lied about everything. Lies. Those are supposed to be wrong, aren’t they? But if Fang doesn’t remember what she did, what we were supposed to do, then wouldn’t it be worse to remind her now?
But I’m getting ahead of myself. The next thing I knew, I woke up. I knew we hadn’t completed our Focus, or at least I hadn’t, but there we were. In this strange new place that was nothing at all like the home we’d left. Fang didn’t remember anything. She didn’t remember our Focus or how we’d got where we were. But I did. I remembered, and I never said a word, and I let that little boy be given something he never should have had to do, because I chose wrong.
But was it wrong? Can we ever judge what’s right and wrong for ourselves?
I thought it was right to go back to Gran Pulse. I just wanted to go home. I thought it was right to avoid my Focus, but isn’t the Focus what’s supposed to be right?
I’ve chosen the wrong things too many times and now all these people are suffering for it. But I’m still scared. I can feel my Focus growing more urgent, always present in the back of my mind, waiting. Ragnarok. Wouldn’t it be right to give in and give birth to the creature that can end all of this suffering? Even if it meant ending the good things, too?
But I can’t. I can’t do it. I can’t become Ragnarok. I can’t believe in black and white anymore. I tried to run away, tried to run back to a home I was never supposed to see again, and I can’t do that, either.
I’ll stay, and I’ll fight, and I’ll find Fang again. We’ll save the world. Both of them.
That’s the right thing to do. Isn’t it?
This entry was originally posted at http://envious-muses.dreamwidth.org/13607.html.