Just feeling kind of sad..
All your life, you just try and eventually force yourself to believe something, because everyone else around you believes it, and you're afraid not to, because of what people tell you what will happen if you don't believe. Everyone does wrong. Everyone is equal through death, and through the human crimes we commit.
I'm having difficulty believing. If a god truly loved his children that follow him, would there be so much suffering? So much abuse? Wrongdoing? Would people who supposedly "believe" in god, be so hypocritical?
I just don't understand...And I'm watching my mom deteriorate, who causes me so much pain and frustration, and I find myself hating me because I've spent so much time trying to be a good little Christian child, doing to right thing. Granted, there are human morals, but is there really more to this existence than what humans through the ages have created?
No. I don't think so.
I watched my mom sobbing on my kitchen floor, because she is in so much despair, and she's realizing the only real, painless rest she'll ever have will be in her death. And all I can think about is that her precious god is letting her die. And I feel like I'm going to throw up. And I hate everything I've been taught to believe.
I feel like crying. But hey, life goes on, to the very end.
I'm having difficulty believing. If a god truly loved his children that follow him, would there be so much suffering? So much abuse? Wrongdoing? Would people who supposedly "believe" in god, be so hypocritical?
I just don't understand...And I'm watching my mom deteriorate, who causes me so much pain and frustration, and I find myself hating me because I've spent so much time trying to be a good little Christian child, doing to right thing. Granted, there are human morals, but is there really more to this existence than what humans through the ages have created?
No. I don't think so.
I watched my mom sobbing on my kitchen floor, because she is in so much despair, and she's realizing the only real, painless rest she'll ever have will be in her death. And all I can think about is that her precious god is letting her die. And I feel like I'm going to throw up. And I hate everything I've been taught to believe.
I feel like crying. But hey, life goes on, to the very end.