(no subject)
Today was a very depressing and lonely day. I went out to breakfast with my family today [that includes aunts and uncles and grandparents] and I always feel so alone around them. None of them have really been there for me like they have my brother. My brother and my uncle hang out a lot and I've never done that with a family member. It's really sad, actually because I just wanted to carry on a conversation with one of them and not feel akward or like I was wasting their time, so instead I just kinda sat there quietly and drew a picture. I didn't really want to talk to any of them because There'd be nothing to say and I hate feeling akward around people who I'm related to and who I should feel fine around. Sometimes I hate holidays.
I was really depressed last night, thinking about how much I hate myself. It's so sad, really because I'll probably never be happy with myself fully. I wish I were happy, I really really do..
and I think the reason why I hate hurting people is because I don't want other people to see that I've done that and in turn hate me.
I already think they hate me enough as it is.
I was really depressed last night, thinking about how much I hate myself. It's so sad, really because I'll probably never be happy with myself fully. I wish I were happy, I really really do..
and I think the reason why I hate hurting people is because I don't want other people to see that I've done that and in turn hate me.
I already think they hate me enough as it is.