Put a smile on my face..
I've come to the realization that there is no inbetween with me. I either have the highest of highs or the lowest of lows, and last night wasn't a good one. I guess I just need to learn how to control my frustrations and anger towards certain people. It gave me a headache how much I did not want to be there last night. I went though, so I guess that is mature of me. I wish I would have driven though; that way i could have easily left once things got hard. Well, not hard, just uncomfortable- very uncomfortable. I just wish I could be as happy as I was two weeks ago. Or smile like I did before Monday. But this is gay- why do I have to depend on other people to make me happy? This should not be the case yet it always is with me. I hate it. And right now- I hate life. And next week is going to be even shittier because my partner in crime will be back east. I will be all alone and there will be no one by my side for sure this time. But then again, AMANDA KENNING comes home on monday.. so at least i'll have her for a couple of days if she's not too busy. And Will Vig. offered to hang out with me. I guess I just need to look at the more positive side of life. But until then.. I'll just stay unhappy...