(no subject)
i had a series of dreams last night, some of which were inspired by nozbev's question of: where now, where best, how?
Dreams from last night... (ANSWER KEY BELOW)
in the FIRST, i was asked to fill in at a play performance at Live Arts, and told not to worry about lines, just improv my way through. i felt like i was doing an incredibly good job without the burden of a memorized script; i had a lightness and reality to my character that the others just couldn't match. i was responding to things in an unplanned and natural way. perhaps i was even upstaging the rest of the cast. but then on one occassion in particular, after i'd been on stage for a while, i became very excited about a plot twist revealed in the play; my character (who had been rather blase and casual before) screaming suddenly OH MY GOD!; then a second later the thought crossed my mind that maybe my character wasn't being consistent; eventhough that was my true reaction, i wondered that perhaps maybe i should act more. and that if i was seeing that i was typically calm and casual that i should try to stay consistently so. it was just a thought that crossed through my mind, and then left and i carried on responding to the other actors without really considering how i was responding.
SECOND dream: after the play i head over to the bar i used to bartend at here in virginia called the BUDDHIST BIKER BAR. the bartenders give me a couple of beers and i head out to the back porch which is now a thin precipice overlooking an expansive valley (which looks something like Death Valley). The narrow ledge (1000s of feet up over the valley with no handrails or protection from dropping off it) is rather full of college students. i drink a few beers quietly and then proclaim to them all, "it's like we're in the middle of death valley." everyone considers that for a bit. i get the urge to get up and walk around, as i typically do when i'm drunk. i think to myself how nice it would be to just wander around the valley floor for awhile, not recalling that some thousand feet separate me from the valley floor still. i get up, my head spins a bit, i notice how the others on the ledge look uncomfortable or nervous about me, and right before i step off to my death i regain perspective and remind myself of the height of the ledge. this happens 2 or 3 more times. it seems i don't have a very good memory when i'm that drunk. i remind myself i can sit and enjoy the view. ultimately, as the sun is going down, i festively pour beer on someone, who pours some on me and i walk away.
THIRD dream: next i am at some sort of group gathering, and there are a lot of people there. some of them pick up a book as we're waiting for the speaker to arrive. it is a book that has some of my photography in it. but the horrible thing is that the pictures are very poor reproductions of what certainly isn't my best work. i want them to put it down, so i hand them another book, which they are very impressed with. the book is of architectural pictures shot by my predecessor at the paper. her work is beautiful. the art director comes over and says, Oh, Stacy Evans's stuff. I tell him i think her work is really good. he says, "yeah but she'd always show up to her shoots in flannel nightgowns." the end.
ANSWER KEY:
FIRST:[SO.. which one is closer to REPENT? of which the first element is reflect. or are they equally far away from the mark? is KNOW THYSELF about lasseiz-faire management technique except when issues of good and evil are involved? when and where do you step in? should we place NOZBEV's question in the domain of personality (Where Now? Where Best? How?) or does that kind of premeditation lead to mere artifice and self-denial? or is it like an arranged marriage where two grow together over time? like two plants with their roots spliced together where over time you cannot separate them apart, yet only thin twine keeps them together at first? (Bet you didn't know i knew so much about how to splice roots.)
SECOND:[i think this one has something to do with me wanting to take on some adventure, to travel, but not being sure how to accomplish it. Financially, things have become more restrained over time and my debts and bills, and limited income really limit what i can do and where i can go. i don't want to believe it is true, and i know that there's a way to get around it that i just haven't figured out yet, but i really want to figure it out. some of this may also have to do with me not really knowing where i want to go either; maybe this dream says it best: i just want to set out with no predetermined destination in mind; i want to go out wandering.
THIRD: i am concerned that i am not doing my best work and perhaps it is because i am not taking on the best projects. maybe i am working too much for the newspaper and now it is time for me to take on some more projects that have deeper significance and are more complex. the newspaper eats up an enormous percentage of my time. as for stacey evans wearing pajamas to her photo shoots- i have no clue what that's about. maybe this dream is a call for me to put more energy into pursuing the Karaoke America! book idea.
Dreams from last night... (ANSWER KEY BELOW)
in the FIRST, i was asked to fill in at a play performance at Live Arts, and told not to worry about lines, just improv my way through. i felt like i was doing an incredibly good job without the burden of a memorized script; i had a lightness and reality to my character that the others just couldn't match. i was responding to things in an unplanned and natural way. perhaps i was even upstaging the rest of the cast. but then on one occassion in particular, after i'd been on stage for a while, i became very excited about a plot twist revealed in the play; my character (who had been rather blase and casual before) screaming suddenly OH MY GOD!; then a second later the thought crossed my mind that maybe my character wasn't being consistent; eventhough that was my true reaction, i wondered that perhaps maybe i should act more. and that if i was seeing that i was typically calm and casual that i should try to stay consistently so. it was just a thought that crossed through my mind, and then left and i carried on responding to the other actors without really considering how i was responding.
SECOND dream: after the play i head over to the bar i used to bartend at here in virginia called the BUDDHIST BIKER BAR. the bartenders give me a couple of beers and i head out to the back porch which is now a thin precipice overlooking an expansive valley (which looks something like Death Valley). The narrow ledge (1000s of feet up over the valley with no handrails or protection from dropping off it) is rather full of college students. i drink a few beers quietly and then proclaim to them all, "it's like we're in the middle of death valley." everyone considers that for a bit. i get the urge to get up and walk around, as i typically do when i'm drunk. i think to myself how nice it would be to just wander around the valley floor for awhile, not recalling that some thousand feet separate me from the valley floor still. i get up, my head spins a bit, i notice how the others on the ledge look uncomfortable or nervous about me, and right before i step off to my death i regain perspective and remind myself of the height of the ledge. this happens 2 or 3 more times. it seems i don't have a very good memory when i'm that drunk. i remind myself i can sit and enjoy the view. ultimately, as the sun is going down, i festively pour beer on someone, who pours some on me and i walk away.
THIRD dream: next i am at some sort of group gathering, and there are a lot of people there. some of them pick up a book as we're waiting for the speaker to arrive. it is a book that has some of my photography in it. but the horrible thing is that the pictures are very poor reproductions of what certainly isn't my best work. i want them to put it down, so i hand them another book, which they are very impressed with. the book is of architectural pictures shot by my predecessor at the paper. her work is beautiful. the art director comes over and says, Oh, Stacy Evans's stuff. I tell him i think her work is really good. he says, "yeah but she'd always show up to her shoots in flannel nightgowns." the end.
ANSWER KEY:
FIRST:[SO.. which one is closer to REPENT? of which the first element is reflect. or are they equally far away from the mark? is KNOW THYSELF about lasseiz-faire management technique except when issues of good and evil are involved? when and where do you step in? should we place NOZBEV's question in the domain of personality (Where Now? Where Best? How?) or does that kind of premeditation lead to mere artifice and self-denial? or is it like an arranged marriage where two grow together over time? like two plants with their roots spliced together where over time you cannot separate them apart, yet only thin twine keeps them together at first? (Bet you didn't know i knew so much about how to splice roots.)
SECOND:[i think this one has something to do with me wanting to take on some adventure, to travel, but not being sure how to accomplish it. Financially, things have become more restrained over time and my debts and bills, and limited income really limit what i can do and where i can go. i don't want to believe it is true, and i know that there's a way to get around it that i just haven't figured out yet, but i really want to figure it out. some of this may also have to do with me not really knowing where i want to go either; maybe this dream says it best: i just want to set out with no predetermined destination in mind; i want to go out wandering.
THIRD: i am concerned that i am not doing my best work and perhaps it is because i am not taking on the best projects. maybe i am working too much for the newspaper and now it is time for me to take on some more projects that have deeper significance and are more complex. the newspaper eats up an enormous percentage of my time. as for stacey evans wearing pajamas to her photo shoots- i have no clue what that's about. maybe this dream is a call for me to put more energy into pursuing the Karaoke America! book idea.