Holiday week
Last week was intense.
Naomi miscarried for the second time this year. Dan found her unconscious and face-down in the hallway after she'd lost a lot of blood. After leaving the ER she showed me her black eye, and I told her that if Dan didn't treat her right she could tell her friends that he hit her. The truth is that losing a baby is the most depressing thing I can think of. But they're undaunted by even this painful episode and have resolved to raise children one way or another.
Matt and Katharine have been caring for their mother who has lung cancer. When they went to the doctor for a straight forward prognosis, he told them the chemo she'd been on not only hadn't slowed the cancer, but it changed and was growing. Because she's feeling sick, and isn't able to eat they're only trying one more type of treatment before pulling the therapeutic plug. After all, what's the sense in taking something that not only isn't helping, but is also making you feel worse? The doctor told them that once that's done it may only be a matter of weeks-not-months, and she may not make it to Christmas.
Kevin and Kirk and I prepared Thanksgiving dinner for 65 people with no family or home. I've wanted to do that for years, but when Thanksgiving rolls around I always want the comfort of my own family more than I want to be charitable. This year I got both.
My sister Laura called me out on Thanksgiving. She has an ex-husband who is married now to the woman who he cheated on my sister with. They've been together since the indiscretion, and when they come over, the tension is so palatable that I've taken the seat of diplomacy and do my best to engage them and smooth over any discomfort. Likewise, there's some tension between my sister and Sarah, the ex-wife of her fiance Shawn. Sarah accused Laura of hurting her children (untrue) while they were weekending with their Dad, and my sister's pissed about it. The truth is that both girls want a reason to be mad at the other. Sarah's mad because Shawn's marrying someone else, Laura's mad because Sarah's the ex-wife, and because she's making things difficult for them. I see it this way: since Shawn and Sarah have kids, they're going to be involved with each other for a long time. Laura (my sister) would do great to be a cool cucumber. Anyway, I guess I have a tendency towards being cordial and pleasant to both of those people who my sister feels have disrespected her. Laura said I always have to be the good guy, and that I was making her look bad. I said she could make herself look better. But I offered to be shady if that's what she wanted....it just seems so retarded. Ethics is such a gray area where family is concerned. What would Emily Post say? Am I in the wrong? I just don't see the point in making uncomfortable situations worse, or even drawing them out. I like to have a hand in my outcomes. Maybe it's my sister's shit and I should just not get involved.
I just started playing rugby. The liability waiver says something in bold about "permanent disability and death", but I'm excited for the exercise, the comaraderie and community, and look forward to some scrapes. Our first home game is next Saturday. I'll give anyone info if they're interested.
Naomi miscarried for the second time this year. Dan found her unconscious and face-down in the hallway after she'd lost a lot of blood. After leaving the ER she showed me her black eye, and I told her that if Dan didn't treat her right she could tell her friends that he hit her. The truth is that losing a baby is the most depressing thing I can think of. But they're undaunted by even this painful episode and have resolved to raise children one way or another.
Matt and Katharine have been caring for their mother who has lung cancer. When they went to the doctor for a straight forward prognosis, he told them the chemo she'd been on not only hadn't slowed the cancer, but it changed and was growing. Because she's feeling sick, and isn't able to eat they're only trying one more type of treatment before pulling the therapeutic plug. After all, what's the sense in taking something that not only isn't helping, but is also making you feel worse? The doctor told them that once that's done it may only be a matter of weeks-not-months, and she may not make it to Christmas.
Kevin and Kirk and I prepared Thanksgiving dinner for 65 people with no family or home. I've wanted to do that for years, but when Thanksgiving rolls around I always want the comfort of my own family more than I want to be charitable. This year I got both.
My sister Laura called me out on Thanksgiving. She has an ex-husband who is married now to the woman who he cheated on my sister with. They've been together since the indiscretion, and when they come over, the tension is so palatable that I've taken the seat of diplomacy and do my best to engage them and smooth over any discomfort. Likewise, there's some tension between my sister and Sarah, the ex-wife of her fiance Shawn. Sarah accused Laura of hurting her children (untrue) while they were weekending with their Dad, and my sister's pissed about it. The truth is that both girls want a reason to be mad at the other. Sarah's mad because Shawn's marrying someone else, Laura's mad because Sarah's the ex-wife, and because she's making things difficult for them. I see it this way: since Shawn and Sarah have kids, they're going to be involved with each other for a long time. Laura (my sister) would do great to be a cool cucumber. Anyway, I guess I have a tendency towards being cordial and pleasant to both of those people who my sister feels have disrespected her. Laura said I always have to be the good guy, and that I was making her look bad. I said she could make herself look better. But I offered to be shady if that's what she wanted....it just seems so retarded. Ethics is such a gray area where family is concerned. What would Emily Post say? Am I in the wrong? I just don't see the point in making uncomfortable situations worse, or even drawing them out. I like to have a hand in my outcomes. Maybe it's my sister's shit and I should just not get involved.
I just started playing rugby. The liability waiver says something in bold about "permanent disability and death", but I'm excited for the exercise, the comaraderie and community, and look forward to some scrapes. Our first home game is next Saturday. I'll give anyone info if they're interested.