(no subject)
stressed because:
i can't find my fake which means no gang gang dance / marnie stern tonight unless i find it
i'm barely packed and leave tomorrow morning
i feel like i'm not ready to leave
car anxiety has been coming back lately
but i know the two months i'm down in southern california will go quickly as long as i stay productive. mando left yesterday morning and we didn't get the chance to discuss anything. but is there anything to discuss? i can't let myself think about it! i drunkenly clutched his pillow all night last night, and had dreams about my first love, and woke up to frozen wine in the freezer. i sat on the porch next to cooper just now watching the last of the leaves falling from the trees, petting him, having a good cry. he's been so sad and grumpy lately. i feel so bad for him. no matter how stressful today is and no matter what happens, i have to make the best of it. i can't leave on a bad note!
but i know the two months i'm down in southern california will go quickly as long as i stay productive. mando left yesterday morning and we didn't get the chance to discuss anything. but is there anything to discuss? i can't let myself think about it! i drunkenly clutched his pillow all night last night, and had dreams about my first love, and woke up to frozen wine in the freezer. i sat on the porch next to cooper just now watching the last of the leaves falling from the trees, petting him, having a good cry. he's been so sad and grumpy lately. i feel so bad for him. no matter how stressful today is and no matter what happens, i have to make the best of it. i can't leave on a bad note!