So i don't know what i will write it is like opening a gift box of control and not. it is how far we go , how far away we are. i have a john cavettes, move. the theater. raw,, a us of a space without extras, with just acting to support the plot. i have an idea,, how do you move a theater,, how to use film, what kind of event to create in the late fall. for the day is a moment to feel. I have cried over a death, a partlet to freedom and complete answers against the mist civil and imposing.. oh hwat i that thought,,, a friend to me is so far away,, a friend a writer tells is a friend of the plots and cray ideas the aliens prepose the science absobs, and the whole of infinity or infancy. (which ) ever ) works) so people get bored with my tell 9of the tory i am writing ofr the story i have thought or dremsed off ,, and that is just at the bar,, or just intimate,, for there doesn't seem to be a seperation,, We are planned and so ideas are bigger than ourselves because we can hardly handle what history we are to consume every day , so to deal with the moment we lack some times the control , and that is the control of the words lonely hours talking to ourselves. I said i had no idea how i was to go on with these,, but a friend is one who listens to the reality ,, knows the blood is red and the errors of mankind saare just in these points we sit on top of the waves, but the ocean is deep,, we judge from this on high state,, and these weekend i felel a moment of truama,, with one of kindness,, an exoposed throat of societies enforcement,, whhich was kind,, and didn't remove an article from the system. no the kindness was to the rich. and not a planned part of this moment.. except the reind was my friend .. yet ,, i fail all my frineds ,, and helplesslyt contribute when i can , but.. so they are there,, giving what they have as long as it don't eat them.. it is good, if i have extra ,, i share,, and poverty is demanded of it's culture. No one ever understood about art and civility. he understood ,, you have to run with our feelings or you loose the moment the training,, others ask of you once you become yourself.. a self un judgemental it ot's self.. and lives to see.. My feiend died so that i may live,, i have always felt.. like a thought eases a feeling writing is to the muse. i am scared the connection with go down and i want to save,, put here in my computer also.. but a friend is gone another brother has gone away to seas that can be know ,, except for love in that dieing day,, and what what was his life gets restored with his daze. his knowledge in me. this friend gave me a job,, where no one else would.. all the world would not hire a long hair,, poorly dressed,, half stoned freak who ,, had onlly music out side of work,, and writing,, who wouldnt go for a drink,, because the idea of talking about5 work made hiim flip out. or reaslly ask for money.. but the kknind of friend who put out like the job was his own,, and yet listen to how you wanted it done,, and once invited the crew to see him play ,, a guitar on stage ,, an a poet,, that means he is a friend,, and alittle stange.. picking up trash , and letting him, he would always have t4roubles ,, yet you admire the fact that he keep getting up ,, and seems alittle more couragious becaue of it.. but who is to tell, because we all become blips in the city.. timeing for life,, closer and closer to himanity,, until even humanity beomes a bought item. when it is no more thatn understanding and letting another be themselves. olivar ,, my friends name, was my boss,for five years, for that is as much as friend and time and actual connect made,, very busy; olivar was a life; write-able High steel construction and He was a irish football player.. and devoted most of his spare time to his club. the history of the sport, seems a moment of unity against the conflict.. and that is how my friend always treated me.. and we should around the world.. accept the system has no concept of human kindness, it is up to us. and in that i say my friend, as he was to me.. i will drift if i go on,, i might write some tomorrow.