Loosening the Grip on the Dream
Tomorrow, I will embark on a career path that takes me away from the career path that I've been on for a little over two years: The business of making mobile phone games. While I'll still be in the mobile sphere, IM apps are an entirely different sort of software, one that brings with it neither the joy nor the sheer frustration of game development. Two years is nothing in the PC or console industry, but in mobile, it's enough for me to have gone through 20 or more games and applications. This makes it possible for me to look back witha bit of wistful recollection at the different companies I've worked with in that period.
With company number 1, I learned the ropes of the mobile game business, I learned to hate cheap ass employers, and I learned the importance of building design documents BEFORE building a game (unfortunately I learned this because our boss liked doing design docs AFTER the game, and thus led to all sorts of confusion in the process). I also learned how hard it is to maintain a startup, and that you cannot live on mobile games alone, if you only plan on selling locally.
WIth company number 2, I learned how wonderful and useful a good creative environment could be. I learned that an entire team of people who get along together is a boon that should not be lightly taken, and the ideas that can spring from teams like that can be truly surprising. Conversely, I learned that a lack of discipline and direction can severely hamper even tha most creative, inspired group of people, and that mismanagement can destroy everyone's best intentions.
With company number 3, I learned dscipline and wrestling with tight deadlines, and that sometimes a lot of work simply does not get done because you refuse to start it and keep whining about it. Take the first step and keep on going. You'll be surprised at the end of the day just how much work you've done. But take breaks to decompress, just like I'm doing now. This is a break. Really. But most of all I learned that I really loved making games, even if I was severely underpaid there was still a joy that came fromseeing my animated pixels come to life ona mobile phone screen. There came a pride in doing my best to try to make these games, however flawed they were, look good.
But that pride and professionalism can only last so long in those conditions, and when a new company offered me a ludicrously high (well for me at least) paying post to work on IM clients for the mobile, I gave in. I did try to apply at PC and console outsourcing companies here, but the truth is that I lacked the skills necessary skills. While my art has improved by leaps and bounds lately, it still won't be good enough for quite some time.
It's not like I'm giving up on the idea of working in videgames, but I have to loosen my hold on the dream a bit and maybe get back to it at the right place and time. I have no regrets about signing on to my new company, and while I work for them I will give them everything that I've learned during the course of my career. Still, there's a little melancholy in me when I think that the next time someone asks me what I do for a living, I will no longer say that I design mobile games.
With company number 1, I learned the ropes of the mobile game business, I learned to hate cheap ass employers, and I learned the importance of building design documents BEFORE building a game (unfortunately I learned this because our boss liked doing design docs AFTER the game, and thus led to all sorts of confusion in the process). I also learned how hard it is to maintain a startup, and that you cannot live on mobile games alone, if you only plan on selling locally.
WIth company number 2, I learned how wonderful and useful a good creative environment could be. I learned that an entire team of people who get along together is a boon that should not be lightly taken, and the ideas that can spring from teams like that can be truly surprising. Conversely, I learned that a lack of discipline and direction can severely hamper even tha most creative, inspired group of people, and that mismanagement can destroy everyone's best intentions.
With company number 3, I learned dscipline and wrestling with tight deadlines, and that sometimes a lot of work simply does not get done because you refuse to start it and keep whining about it. Take the first step and keep on going. You'll be surprised at the end of the day just how much work you've done. But take breaks to decompress, just like I'm doing now. This is a break. Really. But most of all I learned that I really loved making games, even if I was severely underpaid there was still a joy that came fromseeing my animated pixels come to life ona mobile phone screen. There came a pride in doing my best to try to make these games, however flawed they were, look good.
But that pride and professionalism can only last so long in those conditions, and when a new company offered me a ludicrously high (well for me at least) paying post to work on IM clients for the mobile, I gave in. I did try to apply at PC and console outsourcing companies here, but the truth is that I lacked the skills necessary skills. While my art has improved by leaps and bounds lately, it still won't be good enough for quite some time.
It's not like I'm giving up on the idea of working in videgames, but I have to loosen my hold on the dream a bit and maybe get back to it at the right place and time. I have no regrets about signing on to my new company, and while I work for them I will give them everything that I've learned during the course of my career. Still, there's a little melancholy in me when I think that the next time someone asks me what I do for a living, I will no longer say that I design mobile games.