(no subject)
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I'm so confused yet so inspired by many things. I don't seem to know which way is up right now. I miss my friends and all, but I seem to lock myself away from everyone. I'm trying to figure things out for me, but I can't. I end up where I began. I feel as though I can trust no one, regardless of what anyone says. It is an issue of mine. I don't trust easily. I feel as though I've abandoned my friends, and by no means is that what I've been trying to do. I get so confused. In my own mind I can't figure things out. I am proud of who I am, and I have become a new chapter of not caring what anyone thinks. I am who I am regardless of your likes or dislikes. I will not change. I am who I am because that's all I can be. Take it or leave it.
I'm going to leave you with this bit of writing that came to me in the middle of this LJ entry. It makes so much sence to me. Although not one of you may understand it, it is from the heart. Honest to God perfection of my veiws.
I find myself so lost in these thoughts of never ending merry go rounds.
Spinning, circling, faster and faster, and they never ceast to end.
Watching the outside world with their smiles and giggles of joy and happiness as I spin and become nauseated.
Not only nauseated by the vicious cycle of spins,
but of the happiness and joy in this outside world that I long for.
I feel so disconnected, like I'm never going to reach the end of this ride.
My head starts spinning and I lose my focus.
Suddenly, dizzy.
No more spinning, no more air rushing through my hair.
The ride has finished.
I wait a moment to regain my equilibrium, then I look.
I see your smiling face.
I jump off the ride and start to run, fumbling my footsteps but running none the less.
I run right into your arms and hold you tight.
The one thing that I have been dying to reach for what seems to be forever.
I look at you and say, "Daddy, I love you."
xo!
Stephles, the Fraggle.
I'm going to leave you with this bit of writing that came to me in the middle of this LJ entry. It makes so much sence to me. Although not one of you may understand it, it is from the heart. Honest to God perfection of my veiws.
I find myself so lost in these thoughts of never ending merry go rounds.
Spinning, circling, faster and faster, and they never ceast to end.
Watching the outside world with their smiles and giggles of joy and happiness as I spin and become nauseated.
Not only nauseated by the vicious cycle of spins,
but of the happiness and joy in this outside world that I long for.
I feel so disconnected, like I'm never going to reach the end of this ride.
My head starts spinning and I lose my focus.
Suddenly, dizzy.
No more spinning, no more air rushing through my hair.
The ride has finished.
I wait a moment to regain my equilibrium, then I look.
I see your smiling face.
I jump off the ride and start to run, fumbling my footsteps but running none the less.
I run right into your arms and hold you tight.
The one thing that I have been dying to reach for what seems to be forever.
I look at you and say, "Daddy, I love you."
xo!
Stephles, the Fraggle.