(no subject)
i've been thinking lately about life and what to do. not in an immediate sense, but in a general sense. the problem with thinking about what to do in a general sense, however, is that there are so many things that it is possible to do, and they're all out there and there's just no way to know whether the things you will choose are the "right" things. even if you can be sure that in one sense they are right, maybe in another they could be wrong, or maybe they just won't work out for you. possibly they will work out, but by working out for you, they've caused something to not work out for someone else.
of course, the great joy and horror of it all is that you are never going to know. you will only ever see the outcome of the events that follow after the single choices you make. the other paths, the unknown, well they never get to be known. you can always speculate, based on the things you've seen and the things people have told you, on what would have happened, and on what will happen, but really you're never going to know. not knowing makes things hard.
so ultimately, all this thinking has just left me feeling confused and kind of isolated. i'm going to ditch the thinking for a little while.
of course, the great joy and horror of it all is that you are never going to know. you will only ever see the outcome of the events that follow after the single choices you make. the other paths, the unknown, well they never get to be known. you can always speculate, based on the things you've seen and the things people have told you, on what would have happened, and on what will happen, but really you're never going to know. not knowing makes things hard.
so ultimately, all this thinking has just left me feeling confused and kind of isolated. i'm going to ditch the thinking for a little while.