LJ Idol Season 11: Week 18 - Blood Harmony

[encrefloue]

Note: If you're reading on your phone, please hold it horizontally.

Kauai ʻōʻō

my love!                    my

O,                                               life!

my love!       life!

my                                   on

O

Comments

[roina_arwen]

Well, even holding my phone horizontally it’s a bit hard to follow, although I get the gist that the poem is going over a cliff.

[encrefloue]

Sure, I appreciate your feedback and perspective. I recognize this piece won't be to everyone's taste. For me, the shift from a traditional format carries enough significance and meaning that it warrants the risk of the reader's discomfort. It's worth noting that this entry is for Blood Harmony, not the Glass Cliff. Thanks for reading!

[viagra]

"Discomfort" is a good way to put the feeling this gave me, although that does have negative connotations, whereas I responded quite positively to this.

It did make me uncomfortable to read this, the section where I can see the horror and confusion of the plague coming, the sadness of life fading away after... wonderful, wonderful work as always my man!

[banana_galaxy]

I'm glad I watched the YouTube video for more context, and appreciated that you said I had to flip my phone to read. I think watching the video first probably would've helped me understand a bit better, but I was able to read the flow - I read it like the words were musical notes on a music sheet.

[adoptedwriter]

Super-creative!

[lyssa027]

Very creative :O)

[alycewilson]

That is so very sad. I like how your poem imitates the sound waves from the bird's call.