Happy new year
new years was alright i guess you know it was a party sorta three man partay. we basically drove around noah driving and me and nick in the back site him trying to go down on me ...it woulodnt happen. and then i started thinking comparing really him to andrew. nick is a very very sexual person and wants ass any second someone isnt looking and when we are just sitting there we always kiss which i fin i guess until he llike trapts me under him and trys to finger me or something and hes not gentle what so ever. if i had to describe him i would say hes rough and hard his personality that is but he is hard. adn very strong. also he doesnt understand NO and STOP hes just like whyyyyyyyyyy :( im horny (would you like some cheese with that wine) omg its like hello im at the other end of this so i have a say in it too. its not just you buddy. and this is what i dont get he told me in the beginining when we first met and started talking that he definatly understood when a girl said no or stop he lie to mee grr but i lie to about little things so it doesnt matter that he lied. andrew was more gentle and respected me and my body(i hate saying that " my body" whatever) and made sure i was always comfortable and the way he teased was liek no other no other person could tease the way he did. he jsut had to look at me a certain way and i would completely melt he would have me wrapped around his finger but the thing is he wouldnt take advantage of me or anything like taht. o and something else negative about nick actually two: we were in the car and the song asshole came on by denis leary and we got pretyy far intoi the song and nick said hey noah doesnt this song remind you of me it reminds me of me and to me it reminding me of nick i was like ooo great. just dandy im dating an asshole. number two:fuck i forget bloody bullicks!!! o yah..ten minutes later... i first talked to him on the phone for like three hours and i new his first so in my head i imagined someone else someone liek nolan or you know. so now everytime i talk to him on the phone i think of that person and then when i hang out with him it sucks like i feel like this is a joke its not what i signed up for. cuz one of the things that i strongly beliveve and is one of my morals is that i dont think sex or sexual stuff is all we have to do like its not all about sex and thats what i feel it is. we rushed into this way too fast and said i dont like going fast and i told u that i have trouble saying no cuz i hat eto displease people. especially if i like them. we should of been friends first instead of me sneaking u over and all u wanting to do was to make out. this could of lasted so much longer but now i feel uncomfortable around u and i dread wanting to see you cuz i know im gunna only have to fight u off. and another thing i never had any memorable moments like nothing i would go home and call laura and say omg i have to tell u what happened it was soo cute balhblah blah you something that makes me smile and get chillls everytime i tihnk about it. thers nothing. umm yah TINE YOU FAT LARD EAT YOUR DINNER!