Harry's Bossy Blond Bitch of a Bottom Boyfriend 24
Title: Harry's Bossy Blond Bitch of a Bottom Boyfriend 24
Author: enchanted_jae
Characters: Harry/Draco, Ron
Rating: R
Warning(s): Sex, snark, crossdressing
Word count: 1075
Disclaimer: Characters are the property of JK Rowling, et al. This fic/drabble was written for fun, not for profit.
Written for:
♦ Birthday gift for groolover, who requested an update to Bossy Blond Bottom
♦ hd_fluff 2019 Fluffy Halloween Fest, using the prompt Costume mix-up
Summary: Harry thinks there's been a mistake.
"Harry! Our costumes just came in the post!"
Harry left off putting the clean laundry away and dashed down the stairs. For once, he was looking forward to a Ministry function, since it was a fancy dress party for Halloween. Harry had left it to Draco to choose their costumes, only insisting on something that would disguise his identity at the party.
Draco opened one of the flat boxes and shook out the costume.
"A pirate!" Harry exclaimed, reaching for his costume. "Wicked."
Draco snatched it away. "This is my costume," he said. "Here's yours." He tossed the other box over.
Harry deftly caught it and opened the package. He pulled out the costume, brows furrowing in confusion. "Uh, Draco?"
"Yeah?" Draco responded absently. He was holding the pirate garb up to himself to check the fit.
"I think there's been a costume mix-up," said Harry. "This one must be yours," he added, holding out the red skirt, white peasant blouse, and blond wig.
"No, it's not," Draco countered. "I'm going as a pirate, and you'll be my wench."
Harry's jaw dropped. "Are you mad?!" he sputtered. "I'm not dressing as a...a wench!"
"You asked me to get you a costume that no one would recognize you wearing," said Draco. "No one is going to suspect you of dressing as a wench."
Harry gritted his teeth and counted to ten. "I want to be the pirate."
"Too bad," Draco told him. "This is my costume."
"Why don't we both go as pirates?" Harry suggested. It seemed a reasonable solution to him.
"Are you mad?!" cried Draco. "It's too late now to get you another costume. The party is this evening."
"I'm not going," said Harry, wadding his costume in a ball.
"You have two choices: go to the party or sleep in the guest room until November."
Harry looked at his reflection in the mirror, and his shoulders slumped in dismay.
Draco sauntered up behind him, looking hot in his rakish hat and eye patch, and those shiny, sexy boots...
"You look smashing, Harry," Draco complimented. "You make an attractive wench."
Harry's lip curled. "Fuck you."
"Later," said Draco. "For now, let's head to the Ministry."
Harry waited his turn at the table that was laden with refreshments. No one made an effort to speak to him, indicating his costume had done the trick. It was obvious no one knew who he was, judging by the number of times his bum had been pinched and swatted. Only the quick, vicious hexes he cast without a wand had spared him further indignities.
Harry stepped forward, procured two flutes of champagne, and threaded his way back through the crowd to Draco. He arrived in time to see Ron approach Draco from the other direction.
"Malfoy, is Harry here?" Ron asked. "I haven't seen him."
Draco flicked a sly glance in Harry's direction before responding. "He's here somewhere," he said. "We arrived together."
Harry was tempted to melt back into the crowd; he didn't want Ron to see him in this get-up. Instead, he straightened his spine and moved to join his boyfriend and his friend. He was Harry Potter; he didn't hide from his friends. Harry handed Draco a glass of champers and took a sip of his own.
Ron gave him a quick once over, but instead of recognition registering in his eyes, it was anger. "Who's the bird, Malfoy?" he snapped.
Harry sighed. "It's me, Ron."
Ron's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. "H-Harry?"
Harry nodded reluctantly.
Ron took a cautious step back and looked him over again. "Er, you look...nice."
"You weren't one of the blokes that pinched my bum, were you, Ron?" Harry drawled.
"God, no!" cried Ron, taking another step back. "Hermione would have my bollocks if I grabbed another woman...uh, another...um..."
"Wench?" Draco supplied. He then turned to look at Harry. "Who pinched your bum? I'll hex all of them."
"I already did," said Harry.
"Excellent," said Draco. He drained his champagne in one long gulp. "We're going home," he stated. "No one gets to pinch your bum except me."
"Ugh."
"Shut it, Ron," said Harry, flipping his long blond hair over his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around Draco's waist and only grimaced a little when Draco slung an arm around his shoulders in response.
Harry was too impatient to wait for his reward. As soon as he and Draco stepped out of the Floo at home, he pushed his pushy boyfriend over the arm of the sofa and yanked his form-fitting pirate trousers down.
"Feeling randy, wench?" quipped Draco. He squeaked when Harry hit him with a lubrication spell.
Harry discovered that a skirt made shagging simple, as he simply flipped it up, dropped his pants, and skewered Draco with a rough thrust.
"Ouch!" Draco yelped. "There's no need to be so rude."
"You're a fierce pirate," said Harry. "You can take it."
Draco huffed, but he pushed back, letting Harry know he was enjoying their quick and dirty shag. "Harder," he demanded. "Ouch! Not that hard, wench!"
Harry deliberately gave one more good, hard thrust, just out of spite, before he slowed his pace.
"Are you still back there, wench?" Draco snarled. "Fuck me like you mean it."
Harry put his back into it, growling beneath his breath as the ruddy wig got in his eyes. He sought to achieve the perfect rhythm of fast enough but not too hard that Draco preferred.
"A little more to the right, Harry. Ah, yes, that's the spot!"
Harry pushed the blond hair out of his eyes (for once, it wasn't Draco's hair) and kept at it, banging away enthusiastically until Draco howled and clenched around him. Harry pounded into him a few more times until he was grunting out loud in pleasure and filling his snarky pirate's booty with his release. He slumped over Draco's back, remembering in the nick of time to keep his weight off of his boyfriend.
"Harry, my eye patch is askew and pulling my hair."
Harry muttered under his breath and levered himself upright. His wig was askew, but no one heard him complaining about it. He eased himself out of Draco. "Bloody hell."
Draco turned his head to peer over his shoulder with his one good eye. "What's wrong?"
"I got jizz on my skirt."
Draco had the nerve to laugh. "I reckon that means you'll be spending the remainder of the evening doing laundry. Wench."
Harry's Bossy Blond Bitch of a Bottom Boyfriend 25
Author: enchanted_jae
Characters: Harry/Draco, Ron
Rating: R
Warning(s): Sex, snark, crossdressing
Word count: 1075
Disclaimer: Characters are the property of JK Rowling, et al. This fic/drabble was written for fun, not for profit.
Written for:
♦ Birthday gift for groolover, who requested an update to Bossy Blond Bottom
♦ hd_fluff 2019 Fluffy Halloween Fest, using the prompt Costume mix-up
Summary: Harry thinks there's been a mistake.
"Harry! Our costumes just came in the post!"
Harry left off putting the clean laundry away and dashed down the stairs. For once, he was looking forward to a Ministry function, since it was a fancy dress party for Halloween. Harry had left it to Draco to choose their costumes, only insisting on something that would disguise his identity at the party.
Draco opened one of the flat boxes and shook out the costume.
"A pirate!" Harry exclaimed, reaching for his costume. "Wicked."
Draco snatched it away. "This is my costume," he said. "Here's yours." He tossed the other box over.
Harry deftly caught it and opened the package. He pulled out the costume, brows furrowing in confusion. "Uh, Draco?"
"Yeah?" Draco responded absently. He was holding the pirate garb up to himself to check the fit.
"I think there's been a costume mix-up," said Harry. "This one must be yours," he added, holding out the red skirt, white peasant blouse, and blond wig.
"No, it's not," Draco countered. "I'm going as a pirate, and you'll be my wench."
Harry's jaw dropped. "Are you mad?!" he sputtered. "I'm not dressing as a...a wench!"
"You asked me to get you a costume that no one would recognize you wearing," said Draco. "No one is going to suspect you of dressing as a wench."
Harry gritted his teeth and counted to ten. "I want to be the pirate."
"Too bad," Draco told him. "This is my costume."
"Why don't we both go as pirates?" Harry suggested. It seemed a reasonable solution to him.
"Are you mad?!" cried Draco. "It's too late now to get you another costume. The party is this evening."
"I'm not going," said Harry, wadding his costume in a ball.
"You have two choices: go to the party or sleep in the guest room until November."
Harry looked at his reflection in the mirror, and his shoulders slumped in dismay.
Draco sauntered up behind him, looking hot in his rakish hat and eye patch, and those shiny, sexy boots...
"You look smashing, Harry," Draco complimented. "You make an attractive wench."
Harry's lip curled. "Fuck you."
"Later," said Draco. "For now, let's head to the Ministry."
Harry waited his turn at the table that was laden with refreshments. No one made an effort to speak to him, indicating his costume had done the trick. It was obvious no one knew who he was, judging by the number of times his bum had been pinched and swatted. Only the quick, vicious hexes he cast without a wand had spared him further indignities.
Harry stepped forward, procured two flutes of champagne, and threaded his way back through the crowd to Draco. He arrived in time to see Ron approach Draco from the other direction.
"Malfoy, is Harry here?" Ron asked. "I haven't seen him."
Draco flicked a sly glance in Harry's direction before responding. "He's here somewhere," he said. "We arrived together."
Harry was tempted to melt back into the crowd; he didn't want Ron to see him in this get-up. Instead, he straightened his spine and moved to join his boyfriend and his friend. He was Harry Potter; he didn't hide from his friends. Harry handed Draco a glass of champers and took a sip of his own.
Ron gave him a quick once over, but instead of recognition registering in his eyes, it was anger. "Who's the bird, Malfoy?" he snapped.
Harry sighed. "It's me, Ron."
Ron's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. "H-Harry?"
Harry nodded reluctantly.
Ron took a cautious step back and looked him over again. "Er, you look...nice."
"You weren't one of the blokes that pinched my bum, were you, Ron?" Harry drawled.
"God, no!" cried Ron, taking another step back. "Hermione would have my bollocks if I grabbed another woman...uh, another...um..."
"Wench?" Draco supplied. He then turned to look at Harry. "Who pinched your bum? I'll hex all of them."
"I already did," said Harry.
"Excellent," said Draco. He drained his champagne in one long gulp. "We're going home," he stated. "No one gets to pinch your bum except me."
"Ugh."
"Shut it, Ron," said Harry, flipping his long blond hair over his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around Draco's waist and only grimaced a little when Draco slung an arm around his shoulders in response.
Harry was too impatient to wait for his reward. As soon as he and Draco stepped out of the Floo at home, he pushed his pushy boyfriend over the arm of the sofa and yanked his form-fitting pirate trousers down.
"Feeling randy, wench?" quipped Draco. He squeaked when Harry hit him with a lubrication spell.
Harry discovered that a skirt made shagging simple, as he simply flipped it up, dropped his pants, and skewered Draco with a rough thrust.
"Ouch!" Draco yelped. "There's no need to be so rude."
"You're a fierce pirate," said Harry. "You can take it."
Draco huffed, but he pushed back, letting Harry know he was enjoying their quick and dirty shag. "Harder," he demanded. "Ouch! Not that hard, wench!"
Harry deliberately gave one more good, hard thrust, just out of spite, before he slowed his pace.
"Are you still back there, wench?" Draco snarled. "Fuck me like you mean it."
Harry put his back into it, growling beneath his breath as the ruddy wig got in his eyes. He sought to achieve the perfect rhythm of fast enough but not too hard that Draco preferred.
"A little more to the right, Harry. Ah, yes, that's the spot!"
Harry pushed the blond hair out of his eyes (for once, it wasn't Draco's hair) and kept at it, banging away enthusiastically until Draco howled and clenched around him. Harry pounded into him a few more times until he was grunting out loud in pleasure and filling his snarky pirate's booty with his release. He slumped over Draco's back, remembering in the nick of time to keep his weight off of his boyfriend.
"Harry, my eye patch is askew and pulling my hair."
Harry muttered under his breath and levered himself upright. His wig was askew, but no one heard him complaining about it. He eased himself out of Draco. "Bloody hell."
Draco turned his head to peer over his shoulder with his one good eye. "What's wrong?"
"I got jizz on my skirt."
Draco had the nerve to laugh. "I reckon that means you'll be spending the remainder of the evening doing laundry. Wench."
Harry's Bossy Blond Bitch of a Bottom Boyfriend 25