HPDrizzle Fest fic: Luna Lovegood's Good Love Matchmaking Service
Title: Luna Lovegood's Good Love Matchmaking Service
Author/Artist: enchanted_jae
Prompt: # S14
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco
Word Count: 1464
Rating: R
Warning(s): Strong sexual references
Disclaimer:Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: I liked your prompt, sempreme123, and I hope you enjoy the result. Thank you to my beta, mcdanno28.
Summary: Harry signs up with Luna's matchmaking service, never anticipating who his date will be.
The wind changed direction and rain spattered Harry's face. "Bloody hell," he growled, shifting the angle of his brolly and strengthening his Water Repelling charms. Only the thought of disappointing Luna kept Harry standing in the rain in Clapham Common. It was here that he was supposed to meet his date...a date that had been arranged for him by Luna Lovegood's Good Love Matchmaking Service.
Godric help him.
Harry never would have agreed to such a mad scheme, but he was tired of Hermione and Ginny trying to fix him up with their co-workers or neighbors. Neither of them knew Harry as well as they thought they did, considering the boors they'd foisted off on him. Strangely enough, it was Ron who had suggested Harry fill out one of Luna's questionnaires. Harry reckoned he couldn't do any worse for himself than his friends had.
Another gust of wind nearly tore Harry's brolly out of his hands. He cursed again, using worse language than the last time. If the bloke that Luna's service had set him up with didn't show in the next two minutes, Harry was going home. To hell with standing out here in the rain. No sooner had Harry resolved to give up than someone approached him.
"Bloody awful weather we're having, yeah?"
Harry's mouth fell open. He recognized that voice. "Malfoy?!" he exclaimed.
"Yes, who...Potter?!"
"What are you doing here?" asked Harry.
"If you must know, I'm meeting someone."
"Don't tell me," Harry groaned. "Luna Lovegood's Good Love Matchmaking Service?"
"How did you...no, it can't be," said Malfoy, echoing Harry's groan.
Harry sighed in disappointment. He couldn't believe he'd stood out here in the rain to meet Malfoy, of all the possible blokes he could have been matched with.
"I can't believe I came out in the rain to meet you, of all the possible blokes I could have been matched with," Malfoy grumbled.
The complaint put Harry's hackles up. He was on the verge of uttering a scathing retort, but he checked himself instead. "Look, I know this isn't your idea of a perfect date, but let's at least have dinner together, like we planned," he said. "I'm hungry, and I'd like to sit down and have a decent meal."
Malfoy responded with a reluctant nod. "Fine, why not?" he muttered. "But, you're buying."
Once they were seated in a cozy restaurant with glasses of wine in front of them, their moods seemed to improve. Malfoy even mustered a chuckle over their predicament.
"I can't believe Loony matched the two of us together," he said.
Harry glanced up from reading the menu. "It's not so surprising," he countered. "We do have quite a lot in common."
"Such as?"
Harry smiled and replied, "We both had similar experiences during the war, we both enjoy playing Quidditch, we're both gorgeous, and both of us were brilliant in Potions."
One of Malfoy's brows quirked in disbelief. "You were never brilliant in Potions, Potter."
"Maybe not," said Harry, "but you agree that I'm gorgeous?"
Malfoy looked astonished for two seconds before he laughed aloud at Harry's witty remark.
Harry was pleased by the reaction, and he said so. "It's good to hear you laugh, Malfoy. I specifically asked Luna to match me with someone who has a sense of humor."
Malfoy's eyes sparkled with mirth. "Yeah? I told Lovegood to match me with a someone who has a big cock."
This time, it was Harry who was gobsmacked. He tugged at his collar and took a quick sip of wine to hide his discomfiture. How could Luna have possibly known...
Malfoy snickered, interrupting Harry's embarrassed wondering. "You haven't denied that you're hung," Malfoy murmured. "I find myself intrigued."
"I...wasn't sure how to respond to that," Harry confessed. He refused to discuss how well-endowed he was.
Malfoy refused to drop the subject. "The real question is, how did Lovegood know?"
"I have no idea!" Harry blurted.
"Ah ha," Malfoy gloated. "Let's skip dinner and go straight to bed."
"I don't think that's how it's supposed to work," Harry demurred. It wasn't as if he didn't want go to to bed with Malfoy, but he wasn't sure Luna's matchmaking service condoned sex on a first date.
"Perhaps I want to see if I'm getting my money's worth."
"Malfoy!" Harry protested. Malfoy's comments were making his face hot and his cock hard.
Malfoy snickered. "Relax, Potter. I'm only taking the piss."
They ordered dinner when the waiter returned. Malfoy, the fiend, ordered the most expensive item on the menu. He shot Harry a cheeky grin as he did so, letting Harry know that he was doing it on purpose. Harry didn't care; he could afford it, and if it made Malfoy happy to think he'd gotten one over on him, that was okay, too.
They resumed their conversation with small talk, each sharing some of what he'd been up to lately. Malfoy revealed he was running a successful business, supplying potions ingredients to magical shops and schools. Harry shared that he was acting as a Quidditch coach for children, working with Madam Hooch at Hogwarts, as well as giving private lessons.
"See?" he teased Malfoy. "Potions and Quidditch, just like I said."
"Yes, but while I could step in and give Quidditch lessons, I doubt you could handle my business."
Harry opened his mouth to argue, only to give it up as a lost cause. "Maybe not, but I am gorgeous."
"And hung."
"Sorry?"
Malfoy was saved from responding by the arrival of their dinners.
They tucked into their meals, making the appropriate comments on the food and offering to share portions of their entrees. They returned to the subject of Quidditch, debating the chances of the various professional teams. Harry thought Falmouth was the team to beat this year, while Malfoy believed Ballycastle would reign supreme.
The conversation eventually returned to the subject of Luna's matchmaking service.
"Did you sign up on a dare, Potter?"
"What? No," Harry replied. "I was genuinely interested in making a good match."
"You're having me on," scoffed Malfoy. "Why, you must have your pick of any available witch or wizard, and possibly, most of the unavailable ones, as well."
"Yeah, for a one-off," Harry countered curtly. "I was getting tired of people wanting to date or shag or simply be seen with the heroic figure the media portray me as."
Malfoy stared at him in thoughtful silence for a moment. "So, you're looking for a deep, meaningful, committed relationship?"
"Ideally, yes."
"And you thought Lovegood could help you?"
"I did have to answer some rather intense and personal questions, which you should...Why are you busting my bollocks?" snapped Harry. "You signed up with Luna's service, too, toss-pot."
Malfoy laughed at Harry's burst of temper. "It seemed like a good way to meet blokes with big pricks."
Harry's body reacted to Malfoy's words with a surge of arousal. He cleared his throat and tried to remain on subject. "Luna runs a matchmaking service, Malfoy, not an escort service."
"Still not denying you're hung, I see."
Harry couldn't help but chuckle. Malfoy's choice of topic was turning him on, but Harry also found himself enjoying the banter. He was having fun, with Draco Malfoy.
All too soon, they were finished with their meals.
"Would you care for pudding?" asked Harry.
"I'd like to end the evening with a shag."
Harry almost groaned. He'd love nothing more, but no, that's not what he'd signed up for. "Need I remind you I'm looking for something deep and meaningful, rather than tawdry and shallow?"
"Would you settle for deep and tawdry?"
Harry laughed again and shook his head.
"You drive a hard bargain, Potter," Malfoy said with a sigh. "If you insist on being coy, we don't have to have sex on our first date."
"First date?"
"How about rim jobs?"
"What? No!"
"Oral?"
"No."
"Potter, you are an utter prude. May I at least put my hand down your pants to find out how big you are?"
"Would you gentlemen care for dessert?"
The arrival of the waiter, along with his ingenuous question, caused both Harry and Malfoy to burst into laughter.
This...this is what Harry had been missing on his other dates. The time he'd spent with Malfoy was absurd and arousing and amusing and also a little bit amazing, and Harry wanted more of it. He met Malfoy's dancing eyes with a challenging stare.
"Malfoy, what will it be?"
Malfoy took up the gauntlet. He glanced out the window, where rain was still pattering against the pane. "It's a cold, wet night out there," Malfoy said. He addressed the hovering waiter, but his eyes were on Harry when he added, "I'd like something rich and hot and creamy."
Good Lip Service
Cross-posted to hp_drizzle