BottomDraco Fest: Harry Potter and the Berkshire Banshee
Title: Harry Potter and the Berkshire Banshee
Author/Artist: enchanted_jae
Prompt: PROMPT #20
Adapted from: Scooby Doo
Pairing: Harry/Draco, Ron/Hermione
Word Count/Art Medium: 4k
Rating: PG13
Contains (Highlight to view): * OOC for HP, but very IC for SD. Also, author gleefully commandeered lines of dialogue from various Scooby Doo episodes.*
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: Many thanks to my beta jake67jake!
Summary: When Harry and the gang go to visit Ron's aunt, they stumble onto a kooky mystery.
Harry brought his brightly-colored van to a stop at a crossroad. He turned to Ron, but his best friend appeared uncertain.
"Which direction, mate?" asked Harry.
"I don't remember," said Ron. "It's been years since I've visited Aunt Tessie, and Dad flew us in the Ford."
"Open a window, and follow the scent of ginger," Draco drawled from the back seat.
Ron flipped two fingers at him and glared at Harry. "Why is he coming along?" he grumbled.
Harry felt his ears grow warm, and he tugged self-consciously at the ascot around his neck. He was wearing it to disguise the love bites Draco had placed there the previous night.
"Draco is Harry's friend, too, Ronald," said Hermione. She was sitting between Harry and Ron in the front seat.
Harry nodded and smiled at her in relief. He was still getting used to seeing Hermione in short hair, but it looked good on her. They were headed to Berkshire to visit Ron's great-aunt Tessie, but it appeared they were now hopelessly lost. A shaggy black head was draped over the back of the front bench seat, and two curious ears pointed forward.
"When did you get a dog, Harry?" Draco asked, scratching the dog's head.
"Er, ah, just recently," stammered Harry. He wasn't about to divulge that he was harboring Sirius in his Animagus form, not even to his boyfriend.
"What's his name again?" asked Ron, pulling Hermione away from the lethal canines the dog sported.
Harry automatically began to say Sirius, but he caught himself in time. "Sir..er, Sirby," he improvised quickly. Harry winced as he observed Sirius roll his eyes back, and he pushed his godfather's face out of his way.
"Sirby" withdrew and lay down on the back seat with Draco once more.
"I have an idea," said Hermione. "Let's ask that old woman for directions."
Harry looked up from studying a Muggle map to see the woman in question. She was gray-haired but of sturdy build, and she was currently wielding a hoe in a small garden at the side of the road. A ramshackle cottage, presumably her home, was situated farther back.
"Smart suggestion," said Harry. He pressed the accelerator and allowed the van to move forward, pulling to a stop beside the woman. She straightened up and glowered at them. Harry cringed, but he lowered his window just the same. "Begging your pardon, Mrs...?," he prompted.
"Name's Mrs Molewinkle," the woman replied in a gruff voice.
"Pleased to meet you, Mrs Molewinkle," said Harry. "Can you direct us to the home of Contessa Prewett?"
If anything, the woman's glare intensified. "Straight ahead, until you come to the fork in the road," she snapped.
"And, when we get to the fork?" prompted Hermione.
"Turn left, and the Prewett cottage is just over the rise. But, I warn you, don't go there."
"Why not?" demanded Ron. "Tessie is my great-aunt."
"On account of the Berkshire Banshee," replied Mrs Molewinkle.
"The Berkshire Banshee?!" cried everyone in the van. Even Sirby said, "Ruh?"
"The banshee haunts these parts," said Mrs Molewinkle, lowering her voice to a harsh whisper. "It's said she targets specific individuals and torments them until they flee, never to be seen again."
Harry heard a nervous gulp from behind him. "May-maybe we should go home," said Draco.
"Aye, your friend is wise," said Mrs Molewinkle. "The banshee has chosen her next victim."
"Not Aunt Tessie?!" cried Ron. At Mrs Molewinkle's solemn nod, Ron turned to Harry. "Quick, Harry, we have to get there right away! Mum will kill me if something happens to Tessie!"
Harry stomped on the accelerator, and the van fishtailed before racing down the dusty road.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
The van skidded to a halt in front of Tessie Prewett's cottage. Ron bailed out before Harry even turned the engine off, and he rushed to the door. Ron knocked and called out, "Aunt Tessie! It's me, Ron."
There was no response from inside the house.
"Aunt Tessie?"
When there was still no reply to his summons, Ron turned to the rest of the gang with an anxious look on his face.
"She may be out in her garden, mate," Harry said to reassure his friend. "Let's split up and search for her. Draco and I will check out back, and you and Hermione can look inside." Harry turned to the large black dog, still sitting in the van. "Siri...uh, Sirby, you stay and guard the van."
"Ruh?"
As Ron was casting 'Alohomora' at the front door, Harry and Draco disappeared around the corner of the house.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"Any sign of your aunt?" Harry asked when he and Draco rejoined the others inside. He was still busy tucking his shirt in, while Draco smoothed his disheveled blond hair with one hand.
"No," sighed Ron. "We looked in each room."
"Did the two of you find anything?" asked Hermione. Her arms were crossed over her Gryffindor-gold sweater, and her shrewd eyes were narrowed on Harry.
"We, er, we looked in the potting shed and the detached garage, but we saw no sign of Tessie," Harry said, tugging at his orange ascot and causing it to become even more askew.
"What are we going to do?" moaned Ron. "I can't just ring mum and say, 'We made it here safely, and oh, by the way, Aunt Tessie has been killed by the Berkshire Banshee.'"
"Ronald, I sincerely doubt your aunt has been killed," scolded Hermione. "It's possible she may have left to do some errands."
"Yeah," Ron said with a relieved smile.
"Wasn't she expecting us?" Draco interjected.
Ron's shoulders stiffened, and Hermione aimed a nasty glare at Draco. "She didn't know exactly when we would be arriving," Hermione said. "Ron, go put on some tea while I do research on this alleged banshee," she added.
While his friends were occupied, Harry exited the house to let Sirby out of the van. Draco trailed after him.
"Harry, when can I get my own clothes back?" Draco asked, tugging fitfully at the drab, olive green shirt that hung off of his slender frame.
Harry opened the van, and the dog hopped out and immediately christened one of the tires. "I told you, I have no idea how to retrieve something once I've Vanished it," Harry said to Draco. "We were in a bit of a hurry last night, as you well remember."
"My wand was with my clothes!" cried Draco. He would have stomped a foot for good measure, but he was afraid his too-large trousers would fall down. "And I'm hungry," he added with a petulant pout.
Harry reached into the van and grabbed a box of dog biscuits. "Try one of Sirby's snacks," he said.
"A dog biscuit?" Draco sneered.
"They're bacon jalapeño flavored," Harry told him.
Draco's interest was piqued. He took the box from Harry and reached inside for a biscuit. Draco took a bite. "Not bad," he said. "Not bad at all."
Harry laughed. "You keep Sirby company while I go inside and see how Ron and Hermione are doing."
Draco took another bite of his biscuit. Sirby approached him, tongue lolling out. "Sit," said Draco.
Sirby sat.
"Shake," Draco added, extending a hand. Sirby gave himself a good, all over shake, and Draco laughed. "You're quite clever for a dog," he said, tossing Sirby a biscuit. The dog downed it in one gulp before wandering away to leave his mark on various bushes. A sudden yelp from Sirby caused Draco to look at him. The dog's ears were down, and his hackles were up as he stared at Draco.
"What is it, boy?" asked Draco. "Fancy another biscuit?"
The question was greeted with mad, cackling laughter, but the sound came from behind Draco. He turned his head to see a pasty-faced hag hovering in the air, almost within touching distance.
"Hex!" yelped Draco, flinging the box of biscuits in the air. He turned tail and ran, only to be trampled by the fleeing Sirby.
"Now I've got you!" cried the banshee.
Draco scrambled to his feet and took off running again. He pelted around the corner of the cottage, spurred on by the banshee's raucous laughter. Draco dove for cover in some ornamental bushes at the edge of the garden. He held his breath until he heard the banshee whoosh on by. Even then, Draco waited a full two minutes before cautiously poking his head out. There was no sign of her, and Draco exhaled in relief. He crept out of hiding and made a dash for Harry.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry was stirring milk into his tea when Draco and Sirby burst into the cottage, slammed the door shut behind them, and wilted back against it. It was difficult to tell which of them was panting the hardest.
"Banshee," Draco wheezed.
"According to local legend," Hermione began, intent on the book before her, "the Berkshire Banshee was known to appear to families when a member was about to die. She would keen loudly, which warned the family of imminent death. The Berkshire Banshee, however, seems to have taken on a different role in recent times, harrying certain individuals until they mysteriously disappear."
"What does she look like?" Ron asked around a mouthful of chocolate biscuit.
"She's dressed all in white, with long gray hair and a hideous face," whispered Draco.
Hermione glanced at him sharply. "How do you know?" she asked.
"Because she just attacked me outside!"
"Crikey!" Ron sputtered.
"Jinxes!" cried Hermione.
"Are you okay?" Harry asked, dashing to Draco's side.
"I want to go home," whimpered Draco, leaning against Harry for both physical and moral support.
"We can't go home," said Harry. He raised his head and declared, "We have a mystery to solve!" He pinned his friends with his intense green gaze. "We'll have to search the house from top to bottom. Ron, Hermione, you go check the cellar. Draco and I will search upstairs, beginning in Tessie's bedroom."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry and Draco emerged from the main bedroom. Harry was busy retying his ascot, while Draco tried unsuccessfully to tuck in his rumpled, ill-fitting shirt. "I suppose we should search the attic," mused Harry, eyeing the narrow door at the end of the hall.
Draco clung to Harry as they made their way down the hall. Harry opened the door, revealing a steep set of stairs. "I don't want to go up there," whispered Draco. His teeth were chattering, and his knees were knocking.
"Are you a man or a mouse?" chided Harry. He didn't wait for a response, but rather ascended the darkened steps. Once he reached the attic, Harry cast a strong Lumos and began looking around.
"What a mess," Draco observed, still clinging to Harry's arm and wrinkling his nose as he took in the state of the attic.
"It's a clue," said Harry.
"What do you mean?"
"Ron's Aunt Tessie is a fastidious house-keeper," Harry said. "She wouldn't abide such a messy attic." He moved forward as he recognized the epicenter of the mess. The lid of an old steamer trunk had been broken open, and parchment was strewn everywhere. "Someone was searching for something," Harry commented.
"Isn't Tessie a bit daft?" asked Draco. "Maybe she made this mess herself."
Harry was about to reply when a low, chilling moan filled the attic.
Draco felt his hair stand on end. "Hex! What was that?!"
"I think we should check it out," said Harry. Another mournful moan sounded, followed by a yell from Draco. Harry turned to see his boyfriend fleeing the attic in a panic. "Draco!" he cried, running after him.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"I didn't know your aunt was such an accomplished cook," said Hermione. She was admiring the awards that graced Tessie's china cupboard in the kitchen.
Ron nodded. "It was the only reason I didn't mind coming here as a kid," he said. "Tessie always seemed dotty, but she could certainly cook and bake."
"It's odd that the rest of the house is spotless, yet her kitchen is a mess," Hermione commented as she righted a box filled with recipe cards. "I wonder if she was searching for a particular recipe?"
"Aunt Tessie seldom uses her recipes," said Ron. "She always says the best cooks keep their recipes in their heads."
"Here's something else that's strange," Hermione said. She bent and plucked an item off of the floor. "It's a broom bristle."
"Tessie is a witch," Ron shrugged. "I'd be surprised if she didn't have a broom or two lying around."
Before Hermione could comment, there was a shout from somewhere in the house, accompanied by the sound of running feet. "What's going on?" sighed Hermione. She stepped into the living room and was almost run over by Draco, who was bent on escaping the house.
An instant later, Harry came dashing after him. "Come on!" he shouted. "We have to catch Draco before he runs all the way back to London!"
Bemused, the other two rushed after Harry and out the door.
Harry ran outside and tripped over Sirby. He fell on the ground, losing his glasses in the process. "My glasses," he muttered, patting the ground. "I can't see without my glasses."
Ron and Hermione barely managed to avoid falling over Harry.
"Hermione, have you seen my glasses?" asked Harry, still searching for them.
"We have bigger problems, mate," said Ron. "Look!" He pointed up at the Berkshire Banshee, who was bearing down on them.
"Jinxes!" cried Hermione. "Run, everybody!"
Harry's fingers finally located his glasses. "Run from what?" he groused, putting his glasses on. His eyes focused, leaving Harry face to horrible face with the banshee. "Gah!" he yelled, scrambling to his feet and making a run for it. Harry caught up to Ron and Hermione, who had caught up to Draco and Sirby, and all five of them fled from the banshee.
As the banshee flew after them in hot pursuit, she cackled and shrieked, spurring the gang on.
"Why is it...that every time...we run from monsters...I hear music?" panted Ron.
They came to Tessie's garden, and Ron grabbed Hermione's hand and split to the right, followed by Harry, while Draco and Sirby veered to the left. Draco looked back over his shoulder, grimacing when he discovered the banshee had followed him.
"Come on, Sirby," Draco puffed, still running. "We have to lose her, and the only way to lose her is to fool her." He opened the door to the shed and ran inside, followed by the large black dog.
The banshee began wailing outside and pounding on the door. After a moment, it opened to reveal Draco and Sirby dressed in white and wearing smart little hats on their heads.
"Welcome to Sirby's Salon!" greeted Draco. He grabbed the banshee's wrist and dragged her into the shed.
"Wha...?" she managed before she was shoved into a chair and draped with a drop cloth.
Draco picked up one of the banshee's lank gray locks and shook his head. "Your hair is a mess, dearie," he said. "But, you've come to the right place!" Draco reached back and produced a bottle, which he proceeded to shake vigorously. He sprayed the contents onto the banshee's head, giving her the appearance of a ghastly ice cream cone.
The banshee reached up and touched the froth atop her head. Her face twisted into a snarl of rage, as she shrieked in dismay.
"Run, Sirby!" cried Draco. He and the dog bolted from the building, shedding their white smocks as they fled.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"...and then Sirby and I ran straight back here, to the cottage!"
Harry's jaw firmed with determination. "That does it," he said. "We need to trap that bloody banshee and get to the bottom of this mystery." Before he could formulate a plan, there was a knock at the door.
Ron crossed the living room and opened it to reveal an older gent with a basket of produce. "Ah, you must be one of Ms Prewett's nephews," said the man. "All her family are gingers. Tell me, is the dear lady home?"
"Who are you?" Ron demanded.
"Forgive me," said the man. "I'm Terence Teeplecreek, and I live just down the road from here. I've brought Ms Prewett some strawberries. She always uses my berries in her prize-winning pies."
"Have you been by recently?" Hermione asked, stepping up next to Ron.
"Oh my, no," Mr Teeplecreek replied. "I only stopped by today to deliver the berries."
"Ms Prewett is away at the moment," said Hermione, "but we'll be sure to tell her you brought her some strawberries." She accepted the basket from Mr Teeplecreek and thanked him. He tipped his hat and strolled away, whistling softly.
Hermione closed the door, her expression thoughtful. "It seems your aunt was about to bake her famous pies when she was interrupted."
"Maybe the banshee doesn't like pies," suggested Draco.
"We won't know until we capture her," Harry said. "Now then, gang, this is what we'll do..."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"Why do I have to be the bait?" whined Draco.
"Because you can run the fastest," Harry told him, knowing how vain his boyfriend was.
Draco preened, even as he fussed with the dowdy dress he was wearing. "Do I have to wear this hideous thing?" he complained.
Harry nodded. "We need the banshee to believe you're Aunt Tessie," he said, slapping a ridiculous, floppy hat on Draco's head. "Take your basket into the garden and start picking blackberries. When the banshee comes after you, run between the shed and the apple tree."
Draco gulped. "What if the banshee catches me?"
"That's a chance I'll just have to take," Harry said somberly. He pushed Draco out the door, ignoring his boyfriend's sputtering protests.
Draco stumbled outside in his garden galoshes and jammed the hat farther down on his head. "Oh, I hope my berries are ripe enough," he said in a loud, falsetto voice as he ambled into the garden. He made his way to the bushes and began picking blackberries. When there was no immediate attack by the banshee, Draco began eating as many berries as he placed in his basket.
A whoosh and a cackle caused the hair on his nape to stand up.
Draco turned his head to see the banshee flying straight at him. "Hex!" he cried, dropping the basket of berries and trying to run. The boots and dress slowed him down, and Draco was barely able to stay a couple of steps ahead of the banshee.
"Here they come!" hissed Ron, alerted by the sound of Draco's shrill screams.
"Get ready!" whispered Harry. He waited tensely until he saw Draco run around the corner of the house. "This way!" cried Harry.
Draco ran for the area between the shed and the tree, as he'd been told, but he wasn't far enough ahead of the banshee. Harry didn't dare let the opportunity to catch the creature go, so as the pair of them reached the prime spot, he yelled, "Now!"
Harry and Ron pulled up on the bungee cord they'd strung between the shed and the apple tree. Draco and the banshee hit it at the same time. Their forward momentum slowed, and then they were snapped backwards to sail through the air.
"Danger-prone Draco messed up again!" bellowed Ron.
Draco and the banshee landed in Tessie's wheelbarrow, which careened ahead until it hit the edge of the open storm cellar. The wheelbarrow tilted forward, dumping the two of them in the cellar.
Hermione slammed the cellar door shut and whooped, "We got her!"
Harry and Ron rushed over, and they heaved the cellar door open. Draco and the banshee lay moaning on the hard dirt floor. Harry reached in and grabbed Draco's hand, hauling him out. "Alright, love?" he asked quietly.
Draco nodded, causing his hat to fall off.
Ron grabbed the banshee and pulled her out of the cellar, clamping a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from escaping.
"Let's see who the Berkshire Banshee really is," said Harry. He gripped her hideous mask and yanked it off.
"Mrs Molewinkle!" cried Draco.
"Just as we suspected," said Hermione.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"I've got to hand it to you kids," said the constable. "We never would have suspected Mrs Molewinkle was the banshee."
"She disguised herself as the banshee and flew about the countryside on her broom, which was concealed beneath her costume," Hermione explained.
"That's why we found a stray broom bristle in the kitchen," said Ron.
"But, why did she do it?" asked the constable.
"Simple," said Hermione. "Mrs Molewinkle was tired of losing out to Contessa Prewett each year in the baking contest. She wanted to scare Tessie away and steal her prize-winning pie recipe."
"And, I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!" screeched Mrs Molewinkle.
"That's why the kitchen and the attic had been ransacked," added Harry. "Mrs Molewinkle was searching for Tessie's recipe."
"Bloody hell!" cried Ron. "Aunt Tessie! We still don't know what happened to her."
"I bet we do," said Harry, indicating himself and Draco.
"Huh?" Draco frowned.
Harry led the way to the attic, where they discovered Aunt Tessie tied up and gagged in a small cupboard. "The moaning sounds we heard," said Harry. "We thought it was the banshee, but it was Tessie."
Ron untied his aunt and suffered a rib-crushing hug in thanks.
"I thought I'd never get out of here," sighed Tessie. "Where is that lily-livered witch?" she fumed. "I'll make a stew out of her!"
"Not to worry," said Hermione. "Mrs Molewinkle is going to be stewing in prison for the next several months."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry's painted van pulled up in front of the Burrow.
"Thanks for driving, mate," said Ron. He hopped out of the van and held his arms out to Hermione. She smiled at him and scooted towards the open door. "Hand me the pies, Hermione," Ron said. "I don't want you to drop them when you jump down."
Hermione's eyes flashed with irritation, and she all but shoved the two pies at her boyfriend before stepping carefully from the van. She smoothed down her burgundy pleated skirt and stuck her nose in the air as she marched past Ron and into his parents' house.
"See ya, Harry, Draco," called Ron as he kicked the van's door shut and watched as it drove away.
Draco crawled from the back to the front seat and sidled close to Harry. "We're finally alone," he murmured. "Why don't we park this jalopy and christen it?"
The van's tires screeched as Harry took a sharp turn onto a side road. In moments, Harry was shagging Draco like mad on the rough carpet in back.
The van rocked side to side, almost dislodging the black dog from where he was lying across the back seat. He peered over the edge of the seat, tongue lolling out in a pervy grin. Sirby threw his head back and howled.
"Woo hoo HOO!"
Cross-posted to bottom_draco
Author/Artist: enchanted_jae
Prompt: PROMPT #20
Adapted from: Scooby Doo
Pairing: Harry/Draco, Ron/Hermione
Word Count/Art Medium: 4k
Rating: PG13
Contains (Highlight to view): * OOC for HP, but very IC for SD. Also, author gleefully commandeered lines of dialogue from various Scooby Doo episodes.*
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Notes: Many thanks to my beta jake67jake!
Summary: When Harry and the gang go to visit Ron's aunt, they stumble onto a kooky mystery.
Harry brought his brightly-colored van to a stop at a crossroad. He turned to Ron, but his best friend appeared uncertain.
"Which direction, mate?" asked Harry.
"I don't remember," said Ron. "It's been years since I've visited Aunt Tessie, and Dad flew us in the Ford."
"Open a window, and follow the scent of ginger," Draco drawled from the back seat.
Ron flipped two fingers at him and glared at Harry. "Why is he coming along?" he grumbled.
Harry felt his ears grow warm, and he tugged self-consciously at the ascot around his neck. He was wearing it to disguise the love bites Draco had placed there the previous night.
"Draco is Harry's friend, too, Ronald," said Hermione. She was sitting between Harry and Ron in the front seat.
Harry nodded and smiled at her in relief. He was still getting used to seeing Hermione in short hair, but it looked good on her. They were headed to Berkshire to visit Ron's great-aunt Tessie, but it appeared they were now hopelessly lost. A shaggy black head was draped over the back of the front bench seat, and two curious ears pointed forward.
"When did you get a dog, Harry?" Draco asked, scratching the dog's head.
"Er, ah, just recently," stammered Harry. He wasn't about to divulge that he was harboring Sirius in his Animagus form, not even to his boyfriend.
"What's his name again?" asked Ron, pulling Hermione away from the lethal canines the dog sported.
Harry automatically began to say Sirius, but he caught himself in time. "Sir..er, Sirby," he improvised quickly. Harry winced as he observed Sirius roll his eyes back, and he pushed his godfather's face out of his way.
"Sirby" withdrew and lay down on the back seat with Draco once more.
"I have an idea," said Hermione. "Let's ask that old woman for directions."
Harry looked up from studying a Muggle map to see the woman in question. She was gray-haired but of sturdy build, and she was currently wielding a hoe in a small garden at the side of the road. A ramshackle cottage, presumably her home, was situated farther back.
"Smart suggestion," said Harry. He pressed the accelerator and allowed the van to move forward, pulling to a stop beside the woman. She straightened up and glowered at them. Harry cringed, but he lowered his window just the same. "Begging your pardon, Mrs...?," he prompted.
"Name's Mrs Molewinkle," the woman replied in a gruff voice.
"Pleased to meet you, Mrs Molewinkle," said Harry. "Can you direct us to the home of Contessa Prewett?"
If anything, the woman's glare intensified. "Straight ahead, until you come to the fork in the road," she snapped.
"And, when we get to the fork?" prompted Hermione.
"Turn left, and the Prewett cottage is just over the rise. But, I warn you, don't go there."
"Why not?" demanded Ron. "Tessie is my great-aunt."
"On account of the Berkshire Banshee," replied Mrs Molewinkle.
"The Berkshire Banshee?!" cried everyone in the van. Even Sirby said, "Ruh?"
"The banshee haunts these parts," said Mrs Molewinkle, lowering her voice to a harsh whisper. "It's said she targets specific individuals and torments them until they flee, never to be seen again."
Harry heard a nervous gulp from behind him. "May-maybe we should go home," said Draco.
"Aye, your friend is wise," said Mrs Molewinkle. "The banshee has chosen her next victim."
"Not Aunt Tessie?!" cried Ron. At Mrs Molewinkle's solemn nod, Ron turned to Harry. "Quick, Harry, we have to get there right away! Mum will kill me if something happens to Tessie!"
Harry stomped on the accelerator, and the van fishtailed before racing down the dusty road.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
The van skidded to a halt in front of Tessie Prewett's cottage. Ron bailed out before Harry even turned the engine off, and he rushed to the door. Ron knocked and called out, "Aunt Tessie! It's me, Ron."
There was no response from inside the house.
"Aunt Tessie?"
When there was still no reply to his summons, Ron turned to the rest of the gang with an anxious look on his face.
"She may be out in her garden, mate," Harry said to reassure his friend. "Let's split up and search for her. Draco and I will check out back, and you and Hermione can look inside." Harry turned to the large black dog, still sitting in the van. "Siri...uh, Sirby, you stay and guard the van."
"Ruh?"
As Ron was casting 'Alohomora' at the front door, Harry and Draco disappeared around the corner of the house.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"Any sign of your aunt?" Harry asked when he and Draco rejoined the others inside. He was still busy tucking his shirt in, while Draco smoothed his disheveled blond hair with one hand.
"No," sighed Ron. "We looked in each room."
"Did the two of you find anything?" asked Hermione. Her arms were crossed over her Gryffindor-gold sweater, and her shrewd eyes were narrowed on Harry.
"We, er, we looked in the potting shed and the detached garage, but we saw no sign of Tessie," Harry said, tugging at his orange ascot and causing it to become even more askew.
"What are we going to do?" moaned Ron. "I can't just ring mum and say, 'We made it here safely, and oh, by the way, Aunt Tessie has been killed by the Berkshire Banshee.'"
"Ronald, I sincerely doubt your aunt has been killed," scolded Hermione. "It's possible she may have left to do some errands."
"Yeah," Ron said with a relieved smile.
"Wasn't she expecting us?" Draco interjected.
Ron's shoulders stiffened, and Hermione aimed a nasty glare at Draco. "She didn't know exactly when we would be arriving," Hermione said. "Ron, go put on some tea while I do research on this alleged banshee," she added.
While his friends were occupied, Harry exited the house to let Sirby out of the van. Draco trailed after him.
"Harry, when can I get my own clothes back?" Draco asked, tugging fitfully at the drab, olive green shirt that hung off of his slender frame.
Harry opened the van, and the dog hopped out and immediately christened one of the tires. "I told you, I have no idea how to retrieve something once I've Vanished it," Harry said to Draco. "We were in a bit of a hurry last night, as you well remember."
"My wand was with my clothes!" cried Draco. He would have stomped a foot for good measure, but he was afraid his too-large trousers would fall down. "And I'm hungry," he added with a petulant pout.
Harry reached into the van and grabbed a box of dog biscuits. "Try one of Sirby's snacks," he said.
"A dog biscuit?" Draco sneered.
"They're bacon jalapeño flavored," Harry told him.
Draco's interest was piqued. He took the box from Harry and reached inside for a biscuit. Draco took a bite. "Not bad," he said. "Not bad at all."
Harry laughed. "You keep Sirby company while I go inside and see how Ron and Hermione are doing."
Draco took another bite of his biscuit. Sirby approached him, tongue lolling out. "Sit," said Draco.
Sirby sat.
"Shake," Draco added, extending a hand. Sirby gave himself a good, all over shake, and Draco laughed. "You're quite clever for a dog," he said, tossing Sirby a biscuit. The dog downed it in one gulp before wandering away to leave his mark on various bushes. A sudden yelp from Sirby caused Draco to look at him. The dog's ears were down, and his hackles were up as he stared at Draco.
"What is it, boy?" asked Draco. "Fancy another biscuit?"
The question was greeted with mad, cackling laughter, but the sound came from behind Draco. He turned his head to see a pasty-faced hag hovering in the air, almost within touching distance.
"Hex!" yelped Draco, flinging the box of biscuits in the air. He turned tail and ran, only to be trampled by the fleeing Sirby.
"Now I've got you!" cried the banshee.
Draco scrambled to his feet and took off running again. He pelted around the corner of the cottage, spurred on by the banshee's raucous laughter. Draco dove for cover in some ornamental bushes at the edge of the garden. He held his breath until he heard the banshee whoosh on by. Even then, Draco waited a full two minutes before cautiously poking his head out. There was no sign of her, and Draco exhaled in relief. He crept out of hiding and made a dash for Harry.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry was stirring milk into his tea when Draco and Sirby burst into the cottage, slammed the door shut behind them, and wilted back against it. It was difficult to tell which of them was panting the hardest.
"Banshee," Draco wheezed.
"According to local legend," Hermione began, intent on the book before her, "the Berkshire Banshee was known to appear to families when a member was about to die. She would keen loudly, which warned the family of imminent death. The Berkshire Banshee, however, seems to have taken on a different role in recent times, harrying certain individuals until they mysteriously disappear."
"What does she look like?" Ron asked around a mouthful of chocolate biscuit.
"She's dressed all in white, with long gray hair and a hideous face," whispered Draco.
Hermione glanced at him sharply. "How do you know?" she asked.
"Because she just attacked me outside!"
"Crikey!" Ron sputtered.
"Jinxes!" cried Hermione.
"Are you okay?" Harry asked, dashing to Draco's side.
"I want to go home," whimpered Draco, leaning against Harry for both physical and moral support.
"We can't go home," said Harry. He raised his head and declared, "We have a mystery to solve!" He pinned his friends with his intense green gaze. "We'll have to search the house from top to bottom. Ron, Hermione, you go check the cellar. Draco and I will search upstairs, beginning in Tessie's bedroom."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry and Draco emerged from the main bedroom. Harry was busy retying his ascot, while Draco tried unsuccessfully to tuck in his rumpled, ill-fitting shirt. "I suppose we should search the attic," mused Harry, eyeing the narrow door at the end of the hall.
Draco clung to Harry as they made their way down the hall. Harry opened the door, revealing a steep set of stairs. "I don't want to go up there," whispered Draco. His teeth were chattering, and his knees were knocking.
"Are you a man or a mouse?" chided Harry. He didn't wait for a response, but rather ascended the darkened steps. Once he reached the attic, Harry cast a strong Lumos and began looking around.
"What a mess," Draco observed, still clinging to Harry's arm and wrinkling his nose as he took in the state of the attic.
"It's a clue," said Harry.
"What do you mean?"
"Ron's Aunt Tessie is a fastidious house-keeper," Harry said. "She wouldn't abide such a messy attic." He moved forward as he recognized the epicenter of the mess. The lid of an old steamer trunk had been broken open, and parchment was strewn everywhere. "Someone was searching for something," Harry commented.
"Isn't Tessie a bit daft?" asked Draco. "Maybe she made this mess herself."
Harry was about to reply when a low, chilling moan filled the attic.
Draco felt his hair stand on end. "Hex! What was that?!"
"I think we should check it out," said Harry. Another mournful moan sounded, followed by a yell from Draco. Harry turned to see his boyfriend fleeing the attic in a panic. "Draco!" he cried, running after him.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"I didn't know your aunt was such an accomplished cook," said Hermione. She was admiring the awards that graced Tessie's china cupboard in the kitchen.
Ron nodded. "It was the only reason I didn't mind coming here as a kid," he said. "Tessie always seemed dotty, but she could certainly cook and bake."
"It's odd that the rest of the house is spotless, yet her kitchen is a mess," Hermione commented as she righted a box filled with recipe cards. "I wonder if she was searching for a particular recipe?"
"Aunt Tessie seldom uses her recipes," said Ron. "She always says the best cooks keep their recipes in their heads."
"Here's something else that's strange," Hermione said. She bent and plucked an item off of the floor. "It's a broom bristle."
"Tessie is a witch," Ron shrugged. "I'd be surprised if she didn't have a broom or two lying around."
Before Hermione could comment, there was a shout from somewhere in the house, accompanied by the sound of running feet. "What's going on?" sighed Hermione. She stepped into the living room and was almost run over by Draco, who was bent on escaping the house.
An instant later, Harry came dashing after him. "Come on!" he shouted. "We have to catch Draco before he runs all the way back to London!"
Bemused, the other two rushed after Harry and out the door.
Harry ran outside and tripped over Sirby. He fell on the ground, losing his glasses in the process. "My glasses," he muttered, patting the ground. "I can't see without my glasses."
Ron and Hermione barely managed to avoid falling over Harry.
"Hermione, have you seen my glasses?" asked Harry, still searching for them.
"We have bigger problems, mate," said Ron. "Look!" He pointed up at the Berkshire Banshee, who was bearing down on them.
"Jinxes!" cried Hermione. "Run, everybody!"
Harry's fingers finally located his glasses. "Run from what?" he groused, putting his glasses on. His eyes focused, leaving Harry face to horrible face with the banshee. "Gah!" he yelled, scrambling to his feet and making a run for it. Harry caught up to Ron and Hermione, who had caught up to Draco and Sirby, and all five of them fled from the banshee.
As the banshee flew after them in hot pursuit, she cackled and shrieked, spurring the gang on.
"Why is it...that every time...we run from monsters...I hear music?" panted Ron.
They came to Tessie's garden, and Ron grabbed Hermione's hand and split to the right, followed by Harry, while Draco and Sirby veered to the left. Draco looked back over his shoulder, grimacing when he discovered the banshee had followed him.
"Come on, Sirby," Draco puffed, still running. "We have to lose her, and the only way to lose her is to fool her." He opened the door to the shed and ran inside, followed by the large black dog.
The banshee began wailing outside and pounding on the door. After a moment, it opened to reveal Draco and Sirby dressed in white and wearing smart little hats on their heads.
"Welcome to Sirby's Salon!" greeted Draco. He grabbed the banshee's wrist and dragged her into the shed.
"Wha...?" she managed before she was shoved into a chair and draped with a drop cloth.
Draco picked up one of the banshee's lank gray locks and shook his head. "Your hair is a mess, dearie," he said. "But, you've come to the right place!" Draco reached back and produced a bottle, which he proceeded to shake vigorously. He sprayed the contents onto the banshee's head, giving her the appearance of a ghastly ice cream cone.
The banshee reached up and touched the froth atop her head. Her face twisted into a snarl of rage, as she shrieked in dismay.
"Run, Sirby!" cried Draco. He and the dog bolted from the building, shedding their white smocks as they fled.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"...and then Sirby and I ran straight back here, to the cottage!"
Harry's jaw firmed with determination. "That does it," he said. "We need to trap that bloody banshee and get to the bottom of this mystery." Before he could formulate a plan, there was a knock at the door.
Ron crossed the living room and opened it to reveal an older gent with a basket of produce. "Ah, you must be one of Ms Prewett's nephews," said the man. "All her family are gingers. Tell me, is the dear lady home?"
"Who are you?" Ron demanded.
"Forgive me," said the man. "I'm Terence Teeplecreek, and I live just down the road from here. I've brought Ms Prewett some strawberries. She always uses my berries in her prize-winning pies."
"Have you been by recently?" Hermione asked, stepping up next to Ron.
"Oh my, no," Mr Teeplecreek replied. "I only stopped by today to deliver the berries."
"Ms Prewett is away at the moment," said Hermione, "but we'll be sure to tell her you brought her some strawberries." She accepted the basket from Mr Teeplecreek and thanked him. He tipped his hat and strolled away, whistling softly.
Hermione closed the door, her expression thoughtful. "It seems your aunt was about to bake her famous pies when she was interrupted."
"Maybe the banshee doesn't like pies," suggested Draco.
"We won't know until we capture her," Harry said. "Now then, gang, this is what we'll do..."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"Why do I have to be the bait?" whined Draco.
"Because you can run the fastest," Harry told him, knowing how vain his boyfriend was.
Draco preened, even as he fussed with the dowdy dress he was wearing. "Do I have to wear this hideous thing?" he complained.
Harry nodded. "We need the banshee to believe you're Aunt Tessie," he said, slapping a ridiculous, floppy hat on Draco's head. "Take your basket into the garden and start picking blackberries. When the banshee comes after you, run between the shed and the apple tree."
Draco gulped. "What if the banshee catches me?"
"That's a chance I'll just have to take," Harry said somberly. He pushed Draco out the door, ignoring his boyfriend's sputtering protests.
Draco stumbled outside in his garden galoshes and jammed the hat farther down on his head. "Oh, I hope my berries are ripe enough," he said in a loud, falsetto voice as he ambled into the garden. He made his way to the bushes and began picking blackberries. When there was no immediate attack by the banshee, Draco began eating as many berries as he placed in his basket.
A whoosh and a cackle caused the hair on his nape to stand up.
Draco turned his head to see the banshee flying straight at him. "Hex!" he cried, dropping the basket of berries and trying to run. The boots and dress slowed him down, and Draco was barely able to stay a couple of steps ahead of the banshee.
"Here they come!" hissed Ron, alerted by the sound of Draco's shrill screams.
"Get ready!" whispered Harry. He waited tensely until he saw Draco run around the corner of the house. "This way!" cried Harry.
Draco ran for the area between the shed and the tree, as he'd been told, but he wasn't far enough ahead of the banshee. Harry didn't dare let the opportunity to catch the creature go, so as the pair of them reached the prime spot, he yelled, "Now!"
Harry and Ron pulled up on the bungee cord they'd strung between the shed and the apple tree. Draco and the banshee hit it at the same time. Their forward momentum slowed, and then they were snapped backwards to sail through the air.
"Danger-prone Draco messed up again!" bellowed Ron.
Draco and the banshee landed in Tessie's wheelbarrow, which careened ahead until it hit the edge of the open storm cellar. The wheelbarrow tilted forward, dumping the two of them in the cellar.
Hermione slammed the cellar door shut and whooped, "We got her!"
Harry and Ron rushed over, and they heaved the cellar door open. Draco and the banshee lay moaning on the hard dirt floor. Harry reached in and grabbed Draco's hand, hauling him out. "Alright, love?" he asked quietly.
Draco nodded, causing his hat to fall off.
Ron grabbed the banshee and pulled her out of the cellar, clamping a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from escaping.
"Let's see who the Berkshire Banshee really is," said Harry. He gripped her hideous mask and yanked it off.
"Mrs Molewinkle!" cried Draco.
"Just as we suspected," said Hermione.
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
"I've got to hand it to you kids," said the constable. "We never would have suspected Mrs Molewinkle was the banshee."
"She disguised herself as the banshee and flew about the countryside on her broom, which was concealed beneath her costume," Hermione explained.
"That's why we found a stray broom bristle in the kitchen," said Ron.
"But, why did she do it?" asked the constable.
"Simple," said Hermione. "Mrs Molewinkle was tired of losing out to Contessa Prewett each year in the baking contest. She wanted to scare Tessie away and steal her prize-winning pie recipe."
"And, I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!" screeched Mrs Molewinkle.
"That's why the kitchen and the attic had been ransacked," added Harry. "Mrs Molewinkle was searching for Tessie's recipe."
"Bloody hell!" cried Ron. "Aunt Tessie! We still don't know what happened to her."
"I bet we do," said Harry, indicating himself and Draco.
"Huh?" Draco frowned.
Harry led the way to the attic, where they discovered Aunt Tessie tied up and gagged in a small cupboard. "The moaning sounds we heard," said Harry. "We thought it was the banshee, but it was Tessie."
Ron untied his aunt and suffered a rib-crushing hug in thanks.
"I thought I'd never get out of here," sighed Tessie. "Where is that lily-livered witch?" she fumed. "I'll make a stew out of her!"
"Not to worry," said Hermione. "Mrs Molewinkle is going to be stewing in prison for the next several months."
"If it weren't for those meddling kids..."
Harry's painted van pulled up in front of the Burrow.
"Thanks for driving, mate," said Ron. He hopped out of the van and held his arms out to Hermione. She smiled at him and scooted towards the open door. "Hand me the pies, Hermione," Ron said. "I don't want you to drop them when you jump down."
Hermione's eyes flashed with irritation, and she all but shoved the two pies at her boyfriend before stepping carefully from the van. She smoothed down her burgundy pleated skirt and stuck her nose in the air as she marched past Ron and into his parents' house.
"See ya, Harry, Draco," called Ron as he kicked the van's door shut and watched as it drove away.
Draco crawled from the back to the front seat and sidled close to Harry. "We're finally alone," he murmured. "Why don't we park this jalopy and christen it?"
The van's tires screeched as Harry took a sharp turn onto a side road. In moments, Harry was shagging Draco like mad on the rough carpet in back.
The van rocked side to side, almost dislodging the black dog from where he was lying across the back seat. He peered over the edge of the seat, tongue lolling out in a pervy grin. Sirby threw his head back and howled.
"Woo hoo HOO!"
Cross-posted to bottom_draco