Doubts, Fears, and Kitty Cats.

[empyrealfantasy]

Buddy, my very large orange tabby, passed on this morning.  I hope he rests peacefully.

:(

This entry is to be a little bit of a ramble on my own discontent.  Feel free to disregard.

I originally wrote this a couple of weeks ago, but tonight I feel the need to add on to it, and I thin having the background of the first will help anyone who reads.

Comments

[iapetusneume]

One of the most important things to remember is that people are not perfect. When the luster of a relationship naturally fades (as it does with time), we start to see the other's imperfections in a clearer light. This is when the real test begins, and you discover if you might be able to stay together "for better or for worse."

I'm in a similar situation. My boyfriend and I had a LDR for almost 9 months before I moved down to Australia where he lives. I did it in part because I wanted to give "us" a shot not being an LDR (he does too, but I had the means to move down there). And you know what? There are a lot of things about him that annoy me. I'm sure the same is in reverse. But I'm still crazy about him, and I'm willing to fight for it. I'm sure he is too.

But conversation does get a little strange at times? And I think it's because we've known each other for so long. Before we got together we would talk... maybe 3-4 times a week? When we got together, we were talking almost every day.

Tell him how you feel, and that you're worried. Tell him that it's important for you to talk about how you feel. We all have to make sacrifices for each other, and he needs to consider what he needs to do for your sake, not just what you need to do for him.

You're in a partnership, and each one is different from the other. What is true for my boyfriend and I may not be true for you and your fiance. The important thing, however, is to get the dialouge going and find out what it is.

*hugs* I'm also really sorry about your kitty.

[iapetusneume]

Your situation feels very similar to my own. When I relocate we will have been seeing one another about a year, and though we both have things about the other that drive us batty, I feel that we really are willing to fight for it.

However, somehow everything I attempt to do comes out wrong. I try to talk (like about this situation) and suddenly he feels that I am constantly negative and accuses me of always thinking something is 'wrong'. And still he does not really wish to talk about things. It hurts, because I am the type that NEEDS to talk about these things, even if it is for him to simply tell me I am misinterpreting and reassure me that he ISN'T losing interest nor are things falling apart. A little reassurance would go SO FAR in this, but he seems to, instead, avoid. And that hurts, because, as you stayed "he needs to consider what he needs to do for your sake, not just what you need to do for him." and I'm feeling very one-sided in my efforts. I've been jumping through hoops these last weeks trying to please him, but the second I let on that I'm feeling less than confident...

*sigh*

And I'm right now quite sure I CANNOT do anything right in this regard. :( Wish I was stronger. Or more able to express myself in a way that didn't come off as drama-mongering to him.

[empyrealfantasy]

That was me. -__- Damn anonymous.