Fic: the giving up is the hardest part (The Good Wife, Peter/Alicia)
Title: the giving up is the hardest part
Disclaimer: Not mine in any way, shape, or form.
Fandom/Characters: The Good Wife, Peter/Alicia
Word Count: 488
Request: For leobrat, who gave me She takes you in with her crying eyes, Then all at once, you have to say good-bye.
Peter has always known that he doesn't deserve Alicia. He'd just always hoped that she'd never catch on, never realize that she deserves better.
It was always just a matter of time before she did.
***
Alicia asks him for a divorce two weeks after Christmas. She takes the morning off of work, which should have been the first tip off that something was wrong, because he's never seen her do that since he came home to this apartment that's not really their home. She waits until the kids have left for school and then she says the words that he's been dreading for more than a year now.
"We need to talk," she says.
He just nods. They don't need to talk; he already knows what she's going to say. But they sit down at the dining room table, a cup of coffee in front of each of them like civilized adults, not like people who have spent the last fifteen years loving each other, however imperfectly. Because he did love Alicia. He does love Alicia.
She doesn't love him anymore, and that's not something he fight against.
She stares down at her coffee for a long moment, and the silence that hangs between them is deafening. When she looks up, he can see the hint of tears in her eyes. "I want a divorce, Peter," she says. "I'm sorry."
He nods again. "Can I ask why now? After all this time?"
She flinches, just a little, and he wonders why. She looks away before she answers. "You can ask. But there's not really an answer."
The words fall from his lips before he can stop himself. He knows he doesn't have the right to ask this, not after everything he's done, but he has to know. "Does it have anything to do with Will Gardner?"
Her eyes flash fire and he's gone too far. "No," she says. "You don't get to ask me that."
"I know," he says, nodding his head. "I'm sorry." He reaches out to cover one of her hands with his own. "I"m sorry."
She sighs and looks down at their hands. "I'm sorry, too," she says. "I didn't -- I didn't --"
"You don't have anything to apologize for," he says. "I think we both know whose fault this is and it's not yours."
"But --" she starts, and he cuts her off.
"No," he says firmly. "This is my fault. And I'm sorry."
She looks at him for a long moment and then turns her hand over under his and laces their fingers together. She squeezes his hand, just once, and then she pulls away.
He stands, not able to bear this conversation any longer. "Just let me know --"
"Of course," she says, not looking at him.
"Alright," he says. "Goodbye, Alicia."
He walks straight through the apartment and out the door. When it closes behind him, it sounds like the end.
Disclaimer: Not mine in any way, shape, or form.
Fandom/Characters: The Good Wife, Peter/Alicia
Word Count: 488
Request: For leobrat, who gave me She takes you in with her crying eyes, Then all at once, you have to say good-bye.
Peter has always known that he doesn't deserve Alicia. He'd just always hoped that she'd never catch on, never realize that she deserves better.
It was always just a matter of time before she did.
***
Alicia asks him for a divorce two weeks after Christmas. She takes the morning off of work, which should have been the first tip off that something was wrong, because he's never seen her do that since he came home to this apartment that's not really their home. She waits until the kids have left for school and then she says the words that he's been dreading for more than a year now.
"We need to talk," she says.
He just nods. They don't need to talk; he already knows what she's going to say. But they sit down at the dining room table, a cup of coffee in front of each of them like civilized adults, not like people who have spent the last fifteen years loving each other, however imperfectly. Because he did love Alicia. He does love Alicia.
She doesn't love him anymore, and that's not something he fight against.
She stares down at her coffee for a long moment, and the silence that hangs between them is deafening. When she looks up, he can see the hint of tears in her eyes. "I want a divorce, Peter," she says. "I'm sorry."
He nods again. "Can I ask why now? After all this time?"
She flinches, just a little, and he wonders why. She looks away before she answers. "You can ask. But there's not really an answer."
The words fall from his lips before he can stop himself. He knows he doesn't have the right to ask this, not after everything he's done, but he has to know. "Does it have anything to do with Will Gardner?"
Her eyes flash fire and he's gone too far. "No," she says. "You don't get to ask me that."
"I know," he says, nodding his head. "I'm sorry." He reaches out to cover one of her hands with his own. "I"m sorry."
She sighs and looks down at their hands. "I'm sorry, too," she says. "I didn't -- I didn't --"
"You don't have anything to apologize for," he says. "I think we both know whose fault this is and it's not yours."
"But --" she starts, and he cuts her off.
"No," he says firmly. "This is my fault. And I'm sorry."
She looks at him for a long moment and then turns her hand over under his and laces their fingers together. She squeezes his hand, just once, and then she pulls away.
He stands, not able to bear this conversation any longer. "Just let me know --"
"Of course," she says, not looking at him.
"Alright," he says. "Goodbye, Alicia."
He walks straight through the apartment and out the door. When it closes behind him, it sounds like the end.