(no subject)
Last night was our big date night before he leaves for CA. I looked stunning in white pants, a blazer, and a lace bodysuit underneath, with black strappy heels. He commented that he felt underdressed compared to me. Later he would tell me that I looked great, that he was proud to be seen next to me. Small bites at the wine bar, and he was distracted by his phone a bit. The drinks started to kick in and we started to loosen up, to chat and joke and laugh. Bohemian Rhapsody was the film, which I enjoyed immensely. An older woman sat a seat down from us and was clapping and talking and singing the whole time, which normally would have enraged me, but instead I took delight in her, as she was clearly living her best life. As we left the theatre, we both sang along to "The Show Must Go On", which prompted me to suggest Moulin Rouge as driving tunes for the ride home, which he enthusiastically agreed to. This led to... fucking car karaoke. The "Love Medley". My heart was racing. I put in effort but didn't ham it up too much. Later I told him how much that meant to me, but I don't think he grasped the gravity of it. At home, he smoked and we talked. He asked if I was worried about him going away and I confessed that it had certainly crossed my mind, that I was worried about him sleeping with someone else. He said that he had thought about it, and asked if it would upset me, even though he already knew the answer. I said that it would. He said I had nothing to worry about, then. That this was becoming very important to him, that I was becoming important to him. I broached the topic of an open relationship, but explained that ultimately wasn't there yet.
Later he asked if I had doubts about how he felt about me, and I told him that I knew he did have feelings, but couldn't discern the extent, due in part to how bad he is at keeping in contact when we're apart as well as his non-verbal cues, which I have been diligently trying to pick up on. He stroked my face, held it in his hands, said "when I do this, it means something."
Overall, date night was a rousing success, and sorely needed.