All Relative
In recent years, the Nerd has gained respect and kudos from society. Blame Steve Colbert, blame reality TV, hell, blame Peter Jackson. The fact is, a specific sort of nerd is celebrated now, and knowing many of the qualifying nerds in question, this popularity has gone straight to their head.
I'm aware that I've talked about my depression more than any mortal would care to read, and I'm aware that acknowledging this annoyance does not exempt me from my guilt. Let me point out, however, that those days and conversations when I'm not seething with self-hatred are few and precious. So, since I've gotten past thinking I manage grace in relationships, and could care less what these people think, (Of course I care. You and I both know that, reader-san), I'm getting this off my chest:
It is incredibly hard for me to get out of bed in the morning, and even more so to drag my pathetic, self-hating body out to visit people in the evening. Believe me, I think I'm needy and sad and neurotic too, we agree on that, thanks. Nevertheless, there is nothing more insulting than making all this effort, only to find myself in a painful conversation with YOU, sir. I like you, I really do, I think you're very funny and very clever, and although you have hobbies or idiosyncrasies that others may find strange, i accept them. I'm genuinely interested, actually, even if you don't believe that.
What i find truly off-putting is that, while I like your set of interests and not-entirely-normal personality, one slip of my tongue and you give me that face. That 'oh my god, she's crazy in a boring but unsettling way' face. I'm sure you've seen the face before...I'm guessing it flashed across your girlfriend's parents faces for at least a moment, when you met them(if you met them at all). And if somehow you've maintained a soft spot in that desert of time-hardened persona, I'm sure seeing that 'face' sucked. I bet you hated it. So strap on a pair and accept the fact that manners still exist, even if you are old as sin.
I couldn't decide who needed this letter more, since I've had about 5 'face' situations this week.(on the up-side, this is quite the endurance test for the SSRI) Just rest assured, even if I act chirpy and sweet, you're probably aware that you're acting like an ass...and the only reason I look up at your face is to avoid staring at those pesky un-broken veins on my wrists. Like I said, you're a wonderful guy, when you relax and act nice. otherwise, you make heterosexuality a chore.
I'm aware that I've talked about my depression more than any mortal would care to read, and I'm aware that acknowledging this annoyance does not exempt me from my guilt. Let me point out, however, that those days and conversations when I'm not seething with self-hatred are few and precious. So, since I've gotten past thinking I manage grace in relationships, and could care less what these people think, (Of course I care. You and I both know that, reader-san), I'm getting this off my chest:
It is incredibly hard for me to get out of bed in the morning, and even more so to drag my pathetic, self-hating body out to visit people in the evening. Believe me, I think I'm needy and sad and neurotic too, we agree on that, thanks. Nevertheless, there is nothing more insulting than making all this effort, only to find myself in a painful conversation with YOU, sir. I like you, I really do, I think you're very funny and very clever, and although you have hobbies or idiosyncrasies that others may find strange, i accept them. I'm genuinely interested, actually, even if you don't believe that.
What i find truly off-putting is that, while I like your set of interests and not-entirely-normal personality, one slip of my tongue and you give me that face. That 'oh my god, she's crazy in a boring but unsettling way' face. I'm sure you've seen the face before...I'm guessing it flashed across your girlfriend's parents faces for at least a moment, when you met them(if you met them at all). And if somehow you've maintained a soft spot in that desert of time-hardened persona, I'm sure seeing that 'face' sucked. I bet you hated it. So strap on a pair and accept the fact that manners still exist, even if you are old as sin.
I couldn't decide who needed this letter more, since I've had about 5 'face' situations this week.(on the up-side, this is quite the endurance test for the SSRI) Just rest assured, even if I act chirpy and sweet, you're probably aware that you're acting like an ass...and the only reason I look up at your face is to avoid staring at those pesky un-broken veins on my wrists. Like I said, you're a wonderful guy, when you relax and act nice. otherwise, you make heterosexuality a chore.