restless tonight...
No I didn't waste any light or anything so lyrical...just feeling confined and restless today. That old "RUN AWAY!!" feeling is back. Happens every once in a while when I don't feel in complete control of my surroundings. Not sure what triggered it this time, but it is really hard to hide from E. He knows something is wrong, but how to explain...he would only take it personally and think that he did something wrong. Which is possible, but more likely it is the season (Dad's anniversary, and his favorite holiday of Halloween) and talking with Dad's brother yesterday, which was really nice but painful at the same time.
I paid off my school debt, but haven't really pushed myself to make sure things are in order for to finish. Fear of completion, I think....school is something I have been struggling with for so long that it's almost a part of me.
Having trouble controlling my hatred for my job as well. Every time I put the uniform on, I want to punch something. It pays the bills and generally quite well, but I really really hate being there. Worse is that hatred has rubbed off on E, he works with me and now despises the place as much as I do.
I paid off my school debt, but haven't really pushed myself to make sure things are in order for to finish. Fear of completion, I think....school is something I have been struggling with for so long that it's almost a part of me.
Having trouble controlling my hatred for my job as well. Every time I put the uniform on, I want to punch something. It pays the bills and generally quite well, but I really really hate being there. Worse is that hatred has rubbed off on E, he works with me and now despises the place as much as I do.