Creeping
Today is the 4th of July which means that... do doubt there were be some time today wherein I am spending time with Dad and Carolyn at their house. An interesting creeping feeling I find is inside me -- I don't really want to go that much.
OK, yeah yeah yeah, anyone that knows me also knows that those feelings are nothing new. Conterary to some belief however I actually have enjoyed myself more frequently while being over there than in the past. My dad is still a butt head, and I don't believe that will never change, but that isn't the reason for this entry. Why else would I be putting it in the GirlAbomination journal?
Indeed, if I am not at work or with them you can safely assume that I'm a blondie wearing something appropiate to my gender. Since I discovered the wonderful world of hair I've been living true to myself more or less full time. There are a few exceptions, for example in the case of hair removal treatments, where I have made an exception, however it's most always in the pursuit of transitioning if I do.
Now, when I'm placed in situations where I have to be dressed like a guy (like going over to Dad's house) I feel a little violated. Perhaps it is a soft violation, but still violation no less. On one hand it's "Awwwee nuts! I can't (blah ba di)" because well... I like doing what I do -- it's liberating. On the other hand it's a little bit like "Ugh! This is so not me!" I'd say that the first statement is more accurate because I have been treating this transition more as a celebration than a game of running -- conterary to popular belief.
Yes, I DO love myself. I feel like I am fabulous extraordinary person. I am however a fabulous extraordinary person who does have some disabilities, and a deviant gender condition. What makes me fabulous is that I'm able to acknowledge and accept these shortcomings while turning the lessons and time I spend with them into new strength.
Anyway, yeah.. 11:30 will likely head over soon. Besides I need to do laundry because it's been piling up -- at their house it's free. I should probabally work on that.
On a completely alternate note, I haven't had an orgasm in like 2 or 3 weeks. Normally this would be a little strange. Instead it's alot strange because I don't really care either! lol
OK, yeah yeah yeah, anyone that knows me also knows that those feelings are nothing new. Conterary to some belief however I actually have enjoyed myself more frequently while being over there than in the past. My dad is still a butt head, and I don't believe that will never change, but that isn't the reason for this entry. Why else would I be putting it in the GirlAbomination journal?
Indeed, if I am not at work or with them you can safely assume that I'm a blondie wearing something appropiate to my gender. Since I discovered the wonderful world of hair I've been living true to myself more or less full time. There are a few exceptions, for example in the case of hair removal treatments, where I have made an exception, however it's most always in the pursuit of transitioning if I do.
Now, when I'm placed in situations where I have to be dressed like a guy (like going over to Dad's house) I feel a little violated. Perhaps it is a soft violation, but still violation no less. On one hand it's "Awwwee nuts! I can't (blah ba di)" because well... I like doing what I do -- it's liberating. On the other hand it's a little bit like "Ugh! This is so not me!" I'd say that the first statement is more accurate because I have been treating this transition more as a celebration than a game of running -- conterary to popular belief.
Yes, I DO love myself. I feel like I am fabulous extraordinary person. I am however a fabulous extraordinary person who does have some disabilities, and a deviant gender condition. What makes me fabulous is that I'm able to acknowledge and accept these shortcomings while turning the lessons and time I spend with them into new strength.
Anyway, yeah.. 11:30 will likely head over soon. Besides I need to do laundry because it's been piling up -- at their house it's free. I should probabally work on that.
On a completely alternate note, I haven't had an orgasm in like 2 or 3 weeks. Normally this would be a little strange. Instead it's alot strange because I don't really care either! lol