This week on Emily's epic job hunt...
I've been a lot of things in my working life. A catsitter, a bookstore owner, a photographer and occasional Crystal Pusher. But today I sat down and asked myself, really asked myself
What do I want.
So after a couple deep yoga breaths and a lot of soul searching, I've come to the conclusion that I want to be a WalMart greeter! That's right, I said a WalMart Greeter. I discussed this with my good friend Limpet* and she immediately told me to go talk to one of the noble Walmart greeters and ask what their daily duties are as well what is required to be, and I quote, "In that highly respected position."
Sure, my nerves should have been assuaged immediately. Of course I'd get the job. That is until she said I should check the education required to enter this prestigious career. Then I started panicking. I bet there's courses you have to take in waving. What if I fail? What if I PASS?! What if I passed but then they're like "You did awesomely but we can't hire you because you're short."
Ouch. My self esteem would plummet and I would DIE inside. But then Limpet calmed me down and told me I could get platforms. So I've decided that through my job dream of becomming a Walmart Greeter, I would also bring back the 90's! I'd go all out, Baby Spice platforms and Gucci dresses. It was the perfect plan.
...Until Limpet noted that the Walmart Aprons are blue and that my gucci dress couldn't clash with my dress or else London* would disown me for clashing, our social group would be torn asunder and all hell would break loose! Ugh. That means I have spend money I already don't have on new Gucci dresses because mine? Yeah they're all Pastel...
I've only just applied and my dream of being a Walmart Greeter is dashed!
/dramatize.
*names changed to protect identites of real people.
What do I want.
So after a couple deep yoga breaths and a lot of soul searching, I've come to the conclusion that I want to be a WalMart greeter! That's right, I said a WalMart Greeter. I discussed this with my good friend Limpet* and she immediately told me to go talk to one of the noble Walmart greeters and ask what their daily duties are as well what is required to be, and I quote, "In that highly respected position."
Sure, my nerves should have been assuaged immediately. Of course I'd get the job. That is until she said I should check the education required to enter this prestigious career. Then I started panicking. I bet there's courses you have to take in waving. What if I fail? What if I PASS?! What if I passed but then they're like "You did awesomely but we can't hire you because you're short."
Ouch. My self esteem would plummet and I would DIE inside. But then Limpet calmed me down and told me I could get platforms. So I've decided that through my job dream of becomming a Walmart Greeter, I would also bring back the 90's! I'd go all out, Baby Spice platforms and Gucci dresses. It was the perfect plan.
...Until Limpet noted that the Walmart Aprons are blue and that my gucci dress couldn't clash with my dress or else London* would disown me for clashing, our social group would be torn asunder and all hell would break loose! Ugh. That means I have spend money I already don't have on new Gucci dresses because mine? Yeah they're all Pastel...
I've only just applied and my dream of being a Walmart Greeter is dashed!
/dramatize.
*names changed to protect identites of real people.