Festivus
So yesterday the megabloggers and I celebrated festivus via a an AIM chat room. This prominantly consisted of the "airing of grievances," in which it became apparent that everyone thinks I'm "not hilarious enough" and my font hurts their eyes. In contemplating this I realized the megablogging goals of general hilarity I embraced six months ago have recently taken second stage to goals of becoming the premier current even blog of UC Davis. While we are somewhat pleased by the success in this area, people getting stabbed 29 times or bludgeoned to death in restrooms probably doesn't count as amusing. As to the font claim, I laugh nefariously at all who don't recognize its beauty.
Anyway, when I asked apoplecticfittz for his sagely advise on how to be more hilarious, he recommended I be more mean as mean is always funny. In response to this peace of "wisdom" I say: "Apoplecticfittz - You are so full of shit. You think you are funny and are one to talk about me? You are not and are instead lame. You do not deserve merriment this holiday season, you deserve to be mutilated by a giant squid. Die plz."
I suppose that was pretty funny. But alas I didn't write that, he did.
Anyway, my grievances against the other people involved were that rote needs to be less menshevik and more bolshevik. Less the creepy idealistic communism and more the bold and spicey realpolitik variety. Embrace the breshnev doctrine comrade. emd, as I said I was traumatized by that phone post you made. Learning you faked it (five months later!) has taken a great burden off my shoulders, but I mean, you don't see apoplecticfittz waxing himself during phone posts do you? And otimus, everyone else gets to make fun of you, but I don't know enough about you to participate. I'm not sure I want to know you better, but I feel I'm missing out. Give me reasons to make fun of you as well.
In conclusion, you should all be forced to date colossal squid. Colossal squid that become extremely irritable if you are not at all times properly waxed (especially you incomple)!
Also I'm about to be deported to the maternal grandparents house in Camarillo for christmas, as usual. Though its been well established that I don't eat sheep as a religious conviction, they are purportedly intent on having lamb for dinner.
Religious conviction you say? "What religion is this" and "I thought you were a fundamentalist agnostic" you might say. Well see, if one does not have arbitrary religious prohibitions, one lacks moral foundation, and might then float freely about in a moral vacuum to be batted at like a pinata by the more principaled. When I was a wee lad these same grandparents tried to feed me their erswhile pet sheep, Blackberry, and I took a solemn vow to never touch the unholy material.