Weekend closure
This weekend was a mess. Yes it was a short one, but still, it shouldn’t have been a mess. But it was.
It felt like every time I finally got myself to doing something, something else went wrong. There was Cora who didn’t want to be by herself. There’s my car and it’s alarm which goes off when the battery dies, which is every 12-18 hours or so. There’s the fact that nobody picks up after themselves… The list goes on…
But now that everyone is asleep and settled, that Ruth’s grill is lit (yest at 11pm), that I know my car will still start in the morning, that I am too tired mentally to start anything anew, that I can finally find some resemblance of peace.
And have some thoughts.
Over the past weeks, I’ve been toying more and more with the idea of working more freelance. My mother would scoff since I still need to finish her store which has been in works for what… 3 years now?
But it is intimidating. After all, what do I have to offer that someone else can’t do better, bigger, cheaper and quicker? It’s a tough sell. But then, it’s like that with everything… there will always be someone. And that has always stopped me. Well, not always, but many a time in my life so far: that I had this feeling of not measuring up.
As I was sitting here at my desk, wallowing in my negativity, I stumbled upon an (old) article which shall remain anonymous and uncredited about the process of a site redesign. And as the author went through the steps… I had to chuckle… That is what one calls a web-designer? It sounded more like a project manager… there was no coding, no drawing, no rendering… It all boiled down to paying someone for a graphic set, pasting it all into frontpage and calling it a day.
Unfortunately most of the images were gone by now, but the “finished product” was still there, seemingly untouched over the last 8 years as the header graphic still fit the description the author had provided.
Sad…
I do make my life and my goals a lot more complicated looking (and feeling!) then they really are.
And I don’t mean to sound condescending towards anyone mentioned above. Far from it. I am sure they all do a great job at what they provide; and that is a different aspect for each of us. Some may be looking for a hand to hold, some may be looking for eye-candy. Some just want to be heard, and some just want it to “work”…
Faith would be something that would help, wouldn’t it? Faith in myself? Faith in that it can be done?
Interesting indeed. It always comes full-circle
Mirrored from z's bubbles 2.