random writings number two.

[emogirly]

instead of reacting,
instead of behaving in the oh so familiar way,

i'm changing.
evolving.

instead of asking,
instead of expecting a lie,

i'm pretending.
dissimulating.

instead of having any hope in you at all.
instead of giving you the benefit of the doubt.
instead of accepting.
instead of trying.
instead of self-doubting
instead of confronting.
instead of depending on my reassuring assumptions:

i'm abandoning ship.
giving up.