i hate the word if
if i could only say what i really felt, would i have any acquiatances?
if i made a different decision, will life be better?
if i listened, will i be happier?
if i gave him my heart, would he still be around?
if i told the truth, will you still be here?
if i gave you my trust, would you abuse it?
if i could hold your forever, will you let me?
if i cried, would you wipe my tears away?
if i decided to leave, will you wish me well?
if i left you without a note, would you worry?
if i never responded, will i still feel this way?
if i didn't kiss you, would you still think about me?
i don't know man, i just don't know anymore. i feel like i'm bring torn apart, not just 2 ways more like 15,000 ways. how can people call me selfish, when have of the things i do is for them, and i still don't want anything in return. how can you think i don't care, when i cry just thinking about what i did? underneath all the make-up, all the clothes, all the hatred, i'm just a human. i have emotions, so what if i don't show them very often..it doesn't mean i don't feel. i wish i can take back what i did. i wish i can take back everything i said to you. i don't know if i really meant what i said, or if it was in the heat of the moment. i want it to rain right now..let it rain, everything else has been raining on me. i still try to be strong, afterall i've been put threw, i am strong. some people would cave with all the pressure put on me. some people even give me their sympathy. listen, i don't want it. whatever i went threw is what made me, me. i know i get sad sometimes, maybe lately it's been all the time but i'll get over it. just like i'll get over you. i've been screwed over soo many times and now people who screw me over aren't in my life anymore. that's the best decision i ever made. maybe it might be the first of many or maybe it could be my last. i know people want me to learn from their mistakes, but i can't. i have to learn from my own mistakes. it's not that i want a challenge, i just need to know why, i'm here on this earth? am i a mistake. no. i'm something. i just don't know what.
if i made a different decision, will life be better?
if i listened, will i be happier?
if i gave him my heart, would he still be around?
if i told the truth, will you still be here?
if i gave you my trust, would you abuse it?
if i could hold your forever, will you let me?
if i cried, would you wipe my tears away?
if i decided to leave, will you wish me well?
if i left you without a note, would you worry?
if i never responded, will i still feel this way?
if i didn't kiss you, would you still think about me?
i don't know man, i just don't know anymore. i feel like i'm bring torn apart, not just 2 ways more like 15,000 ways. how can people call me selfish, when have of the things i do is for them, and i still don't want anything in return. how can you think i don't care, when i cry just thinking about what i did? underneath all the make-up, all the clothes, all the hatred, i'm just a human. i have emotions, so what if i don't show them very often..it doesn't mean i don't feel. i wish i can take back what i did. i wish i can take back everything i said to you. i don't know if i really meant what i said, or if it was in the heat of the moment. i want it to rain right now..let it rain, everything else has been raining on me. i still try to be strong, afterall i've been put threw, i am strong. some people would cave with all the pressure put on me. some people even give me their sympathy. listen, i don't want it. whatever i went threw is what made me, me. i know i get sad sometimes, maybe lately it's been all the time but i'll get over it. just like i'll get over you. i've been screwed over soo many times and now people who screw me over aren't in my life anymore. that's the best decision i ever made. maybe it might be the first of many or maybe it could be my last. i know people want me to learn from their mistakes, but i can't. i have to learn from my own mistakes. it's not that i want a challenge, i just need to know why, i'm here on this earth? am i a mistake. no. i'm something. i just don't know what.