Past, Present, Future.
In the fashion of conformity.
I'm updating.
Well, I graduate in a little over a month and have 16 days of real school left. One of which I will be visiting the lovely and talented Hannah and eight of which I'll sleep through. I think I'll fail Stat. Or at most, get a D.
I'm back to the old me of staying up to ridiculous hours. It's 4. I'm waking up from a sleep I haven't started in 3 hours and 58 minutes. Fun.
I'm just kind of stuck. I can't sleep because I'm thinking about the future and when I submit to the tortures of acknowledging consciousness, I can't get tired because I'm thinking about the past. For the past four hours I have been alternating between laying in bed with my eyes shut and fiddling around on the computer.
I just can't help from thinking that these past four years have completely changed me as a person. And who made me change. It's the most varied group I've ever heard seen, and I miss about half of them because I let them slip away. I'm caught between wanting to Submit to the Cause and contact her, him and them or just letting them go. I know at least one is happy. And I'm not selfish enough to try to blur his now with my past.
Of about half of the people I let slip would like me better now than they did when we were close. Of the half that aren't those, half of those would be hate me and the other half... I have no idea how they would feel.
I'm off to UMBC in a little over 3 months. If I don't like nursing, I'm transfering to Boulder next year. That's my future, in case you were tired of hearing of my past and now.
I'm excited for the summer. I don't feel like I have any reasons to not get my hopes up. I feel like we are all mature enough to not cause meaningless drama. It's what a year of college and a year of feeling isolated (for those of us who stayed back) can do to you. It shall be a summer that rivals the carefree attitude of last summer. Isn't it odd to think that the decadent summer of two years ago is so far in the past? That we have an actual amazing, practically drama free summer to recall on and not feel guilty about?
I haven't done homework this entire semester. I have a b in english and once I take my anatomy test, my 25% will be raised. The rest of the classes, minus stat, I think I have a's in.
With that, I'm done. I'll try again to monopolize the next 3 hours and 46 minutes with sleep. Maybe I'll get an hour in. Or maybe I'll just sleep through the first half of the day for the fourth time this week.
I'm updating.
Well, I graduate in a little over a month and have 16 days of real school left. One of which I will be visiting the lovely and talented Hannah and eight of which I'll sleep through. I think I'll fail Stat. Or at most, get a D.
I'm back to the old me of staying up to ridiculous hours. It's 4. I'm waking up from a sleep I haven't started in 3 hours and 58 minutes. Fun.
I'm just kind of stuck. I can't sleep because I'm thinking about the future and when I submit to the tortures of acknowledging consciousness, I can't get tired because I'm thinking about the past. For the past four hours I have been alternating between laying in bed with my eyes shut and fiddling around on the computer.
I just can't help from thinking that these past four years have completely changed me as a person. And who made me change. It's the most varied group I've ever heard seen, and I miss about half of them because I let them slip away. I'm caught between wanting to Submit to the Cause and contact her, him and them or just letting them go. I know at least one is happy. And I'm not selfish enough to try to blur his now with my past.
Of about half of the people I let slip would like me better now than they did when we were close. Of the half that aren't those, half of those would be hate me and the other half... I have no idea how they would feel.
I'm off to UMBC in a little over 3 months. If I don't like nursing, I'm transfering to Boulder next year. That's my future, in case you were tired of hearing of my past and now.
I'm excited for the summer. I don't feel like I have any reasons to not get my hopes up. I feel like we are all mature enough to not cause meaningless drama. It's what a year of college and a year of feeling isolated (for those of us who stayed back) can do to you. It shall be a summer that rivals the carefree attitude of last summer. Isn't it odd to think that the decadent summer of two years ago is so far in the past? That we have an actual amazing, practically drama free summer to recall on and not feel guilty about?
I haven't done homework this entire semester. I have a b in english and once I take my anatomy test, my 25% will be raised. The rest of the classes, minus stat, I think I have a's in.
With that, I'm done. I'll try again to monopolize the next 3 hours and 46 minutes with sleep. Maybe I'll get an hour in. Or maybe I'll just sleep through the first half of the day for the fourth time this week.