(no subject)
so you know when you find that one song that just fits the best at the exact moment that you need it to... well where the hell is my FUCKING song for how i am feeling now. sorry for the f-word not needed i know just not in the best place in my head right now. which makes me mad bc i have been sooo freaking happy lately but now its like a ton of bricks just hit me but instead of bricks its hurt, sadness, left out, hated, not love, WHY CANT YOU JUST BE DIFFERENT, YOU ARE THE "difficult child", WHY cant everything just go away and leave me the hell alone, i dont mean people at all i love my friends, i mean that i just want my feelings/thoughts in my head to go away for a very very long time!
i love this song....
I never knew there'd be distance between us,
what I've done cannot be repeated...
And I've got scars I'm willing to show you,
you had heart that I'll never see,
..... caldecott tunnel- SOMETHING CORPORATE
i watch DONNY DARKO with friends last night, they make me soooo happy and that movie makes me think, i love movies that make me think. like vanilla sky, i had or have a hole theory to that movie i loved it same with this movie,
you ever notice if you clear your mind long enough the only thoughts that come into it are sad ones or ones that you try to push out, maybe thats why im always doing something bc im afraid if i stop long enough ill remember all the AWFUL thoughts in my mind, that kinda scares me.
i dont like not being myself of feeling like myself . i use to be soo happy all the time, ask david he use to have to ask me to please calm down in the morning bc i would just be so happy and out there but now i wish someone would tell me to be a little more uncalm bc i am too calm (well at times lol) , i dont like it and i try to sit down and collect my thoughts but i cant, bc when i try to i just get even more sad bc i start thinking about all the bad stuff. i hate life sometimes like i know it has to be hard, but i just dont want it to be hard anymore, i want a vacation from a hard life
man am i a cry baby. im going to shut up now, i always talk to much, bye-
i love this song....
I never knew there'd be distance between us,
what I've done cannot be repeated...
And I've got scars I'm willing to show you,
you had heart that I'll never see,
..... caldecott tunnel- SOMETHING CORPORATE
i watch DONNY DARKO with friends last night, they make me soooo happy and that movie makes me think, i love movies that make me think. like vanilla sky, i had or have a hole theory to that movie i loved it same with this movie,
you ever notice if you clear your mind long enough the only thoughts that come into it are sad ones or ones that you try to push out, maybe thats why im always doing something bc im afraid if i stop long enough ill remember all the AWFUL thoughts in my mind, that kinda scares me.
i dont like not being myself of feeling like myself . i use to be soo happy all the time, ask david he use to have to ask me to please calm down in the morning bc i would just be so happy and out there but now i wish someone would tell me to be a little more uncalm bc i am too calm (well at times lol) , i dont like it and i try to sit down and collect my thoughts but i cant, bc when i try to i just get even more sad bc i start thinking about all the bad stuff. i hate life sometimes like i know it has to be hard, but i just dont want it to be hard anymore, i want a vacation from a hard life
man am i a cry baby. im going to shut up now, i always talk to much, bye-