meh..

[emmalabebe]

well it seems some ppl got a lil pissed at my last entry and i ahve to rewrite this one all overa gain cause i was stupid and was on the computer when it was storming and the lights blinked...i am never doin that again..but anyways, this is my journal i can put whatever i want and how i feel i dont care who reads it..and by the way i debated rather or not to say anything like that cause of blaine reading this cause i thought that was a lil wrong to but finally i was like fuck it...and yeah i kno i had a perfect opertuinity w/ blaine but the thing is i really didnt have any feelings for blaine and i realisded that after we kissed and i didnt want that realtionship to be like my first one...and yeah pointless to go on, even though i did try i wanted to make sure there was no feelings for him what so ever and yea i realised there wasnt and blaine im sry, plus it was the friend thing but maily the feelings cause u cant have a realitonship unless both of u have feelings for each other...and whoever told him otherwise is a dick and doesnt know what the fuck they r talkin about..but yea the reason why i said i was lonley in the first place cause i am and cause SO MANY FUCKIN PPL advirstie that they r in love w/ each other..some more than others well more like some over do it completly..and its rather annoying...plus its not like i am used to gettin asked out very often so ya, its like i want a guy who i like/love w/e who feels the same way back and vice versa...and please do not reply to my journal if u do not kno what the fuck ur talkin about esspially if u are NOT one of my friends...and im sure i will get some replys on this thing right here but i dont care like i said b4 this is my journal and i can say whatever i want, its ur choice to get pissed cause its siersuly how i feel yall just read it...

but anyways off that topic what ahave i done since i lost wrote in this thing...abosultly nothing cause i have no life what so ever..except mo did sleep over last night and we didnt really do anything cause i was really mellow (except for like 5 min at midnight), then my dad wanted to kno if i wanted to fly with my mom the next day (which would of been today) to go to NC but that wouldnt of worked out cause Monique was sleeping over and there was no way for her to get inside her hosue and i felt bad all of a sudden change of plans plus it was sudden so ya i never ended up goin. then today we went over to dustins house (he broke his leg motercrossing so he coulnt really walk over to my house =( its gotta suck for him...i feel bad) so he could tune her guitar..and he was showing us some stuff and talked to us about it and stuff...dustin is pretty cool to bad he doesnt go to mandarin..but anyways tomorrow we r gonna go look for a guitar for me..yay lol i am very intrested in it now..my mom is gonna get my lessons in sept. when im done w/ karate (more like when my 6 months r done) so i am excited bout that...im sure b4 i get lessons i can get dustin to show me stuff like he was doin today..ya i acutally understand alot more about it lol even though i still suck but hey lol..ok well i am gonna go...peace